Advertising
Advertising

Why Hopeless Romantics Are Actually The Most Hopeful Ones In Love

Why Hopeless Romantics Are Actually The Most Hopeful Ones In Love

Often labelled as foolish, irrational, indecisive and unrealistic, the hopeless romantic is often thought of as the hapless romantic; the ill-fated lover wearing rose colored glasses, and constantly burdened by that crazy thing called love.

But behind all those rather unfair descriptions lies a solid and steadfast heart of gold; one of strength, that refuses to allow the ills of the world to taint their hopes. They may be romantics, dreamers and idealists, but they are far from hopeless. Instead, their true identity lies within the ‘hope-full’.

So here are 10 examples why these guardians of love should be treasured!

Advertising

They hope for the best.

True optimistics, they are a glass-half-full bunch, who rather than becoming cynical after heartbreak, choose to believe everything happens for a reason, or a season. Sure it probably hurts like nothing else, and they deal with that hurt accordingly, but once they’ve gotten over the pain, they get right back up, as hopeful and as positive as ever.

They are determined.

There’s nothing like the belief they have in love that spurs them on. To most, love is just a romanticized notion, but to the hopeless romantic, love represents so much more. The determination they have to acquire love results in a strong willed personality, that helps them fight through the day-to-day, hoping for something great and wonderful. This means they don’t buckle at the first hurdle, persevere and put their whole being into making things work. These guys are in it for the long-haul.

They are problem solvers.

In a relationship, they want to make it all better. They wish they can take your pain away, and will do the utmost to make sure you don’t suffer. As a friend, the hopeless romantic is your go-to for advice (and hugs!) Their ability to find solutions where others cannot is extremely impressive and makes the hopeless romantic, as a partner and friend, the person everyone should have in their corner.

Advertising

They know when to give you space.

They understand all too well the matters of the heart, and appreciate all aspects of love, especially those that require the need for alone time to mend. They’re not into pressuring you or trying to hurry the process of recovery, or forgiveness. Instead, they allow time, and love, to do their work, knowing that soon your heart will mend and you’ll be ready to fight again.

They offer a different perspective.

As a friend, they’ll suggest you see things from the other persons point of view, asking you to be totally honest with yourself, which in turn does wonders in helping you to move on from heartbreak. As a partner, they’ll encourage you to speak your mind while they try to see things from your side. This balanced approach not only makes for darn good therapy, but also aids healing.

They know what they’re looking for.

Being hopeful allows them to tap into that side of themselves that refuses to settle for less than what they deserve. They are extremely decisive about what they want, but most importantly, what they don’t want. They are assured in their quest for the real thing, and refuse to waste time with a ‘maybe’. They’ll hold true to their desires if it means they get to live out life with their soul mate. Settling is not an option.

Advertising

They’ll fight when you can’t.

As a friend, they understand why you may want to opt out of the whole love thing, or why you’ve put up that protective layer (read: wall!) to keep out people from trampling all over your heart again, but they are also aware that wall may also be keeping out your soul mate. So they work with you, side by side, day and night to create a little side door that only true love is allowed to pass through. And while you recuperate, they”ll stand guard against the baddies who may be trying to scale the wall. You’ve been warned!

They are not superficial.

Contrary to popular belief, they are not shallow. In fact, their need for real love, rather than flings, puts them in an ideal position to look beyond the surface of a potential mate and see the beauty that lies beneath. This ability also holds them well when it comes to determining whether of not the potential love is indeed right for them. Being able to distinguish and decipher the reality from the fiction is what allows them to seek out that true love, where others may be confused by it all. Beyond the cosmetic, they can delve deep enough to discover the real person.

They’re honest about who they are and what they want.

They don’t feel they have to hide their true feelings from you. They see no problem in vulnerability – it’s their strength, and they respect themselves enough to not have to lie about what they truly want from a relationship. There’s no pretending they’re okay with just hooking up when what they really want is an exclusive relationship, or pretending they’re cool with just living together when they really want to get married.

Advertising

They don’t hold back.

They’ll tell you they love you, and mean it. They’ll treat you like the precious gift you are, and you won’t have to ask. They’ll dote on you. There’s no end to how special they want to make you feel. With them, you’ll feel totally and completely loved and adored. When they are with you, they are with you.

The best part: it’s all genuine with this not so hopeless romantic. What else could be better!

Featured photo credit: Man with a Bouquet of Roses/Viktor Hanacek via picjumbo.com

More by this author

Patricia C. Osei-Oppong

Writer, Poet, Marketer

15 Tell-Tale Signs You’re an Old Soul and Think Differently 11 Signs That Your Job Is Not Suitable For You What Does It Mean to Be an Extroverted Introvert? Toxic Behaviors That Are Making You Unhappy (And You Don’t Even Notice) If You Want A Long-Lasting Relationship, You Should Keep Doing These 10 Things

Trending in Communication

1 7 Ways To Deal With Negative People 2 How to Talk to Strangers Without Feeling Awkward 3 What Are Interpersonal Skills? Master Them for Better Relationships 4 How To Stop Negative Thoughts from Killing Your Confidence 5 This 4-Year Old Girl’s Explanation On the Problem with New Year’s Resolutions Is Everything You Need

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

Advertising

In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

Advertising

But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

Advertising

5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

Advertising

You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

Read Next