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What People With Anxiety Want Their Loved Ones To Say

What People With Anxiety Want Their Loved Ones To Say

People who suffer with anxiety are having a constant battle because, for them, anxiety is one of those things that is ever present. We have our good days and we have our bad days. When we have those bad days, we look for comfort from those who are closest to us.

Here are some of the things we want the people we love to say to us when we feel anxious:

1. If you can go, that’s great- but if you can’t, that’s okay too.

We don’t like feeling forced into anything. It makes the anxiety worse. We like having the option to back out if we don’t feel right, which helps us to feel less trapped. It calms us down knowing that we can choose whether or not we want to do something.

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2. Take your time.

Our biggest fear is that we are wasting your time. We constantly feel like we are inconveniencing everyone around us by feeling the way we do. When you let us know that time is not an issue, we find it easier to calm down as we don’t have that added worry.

3. We are proud of you for doing this.

Certain things that may seem simple can require a lot of thought and energy for us to accomplish. When we do things that may seem insignificant to you, it might be a big deal for us. We like to hear that you are proud of us when we try our best to do things that we find challenging. It lets us know that you understand how difficult it was for us to persevere.

4. I understand it’s something that you can’t control.

The worst thing we can hear is someone telling us to control ourselves and get over it. We want people around us to acknowledge that we cannot control the anxiety when it shows up, or how intense it gets. It makes us feel at ease knowing that you understand.

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5. I know that you are trying.

We like knowing that you understand that we are trying. Sometimes we feel like people think that we are lazy or we aren’t trying. It’s nice to know that people really understand that we are persevering, despite it not being easy for us.

6. What can I do to make you feel better?

When we start feeling anxious, it helps if you ask us what you can do to help. Most of the time we just have to sit there and wait for the anxiety to pass or go get some fresh air. We appreciate it when you ask because it makes us feel like you care about what we are going through.

7. You’re fine, everything’s fine.

We like to be reassured that everything around us isn’t falling apart. When our anxiety comes along, we can’t always pinpoint why it showed up. Sometimes we like being reminded that nothing terrible is going on.

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8. Let’s go get some fresh air.

This is the best thing that you can say to us when we are anxious. Nothing helps anxiety more than being in an open area with fresh air. We are able to feel less trapped and we are given space to sort through our emotions.

9. You’re not bothering us at all.

This ties into how we feel like we are wasting people’s time. We hate feeling like a burden when we are out with friends and family. It reassures us when you tell us that we aren’t troubling you when we start to feel anxious.

10. Let’s sort through this together.

Sometimes it feels good to talk through it. It feels reassuring when you sit with us and talk through what is worrying us, potentially allowing us to figure out what prompted the anxiety to intensify.This can help to reduce our feelings of fear, apprehension, and panic. It also feels great to let it all out with someone you love.

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Featured photo credit: eflon via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 15, 2019

How to Tap Into the Power of Positivity

How to Tap Into the Power of Positivity

As it appears, the human mind is not capable of not thinking, at least on the subconscious level. Our mind is always occupied by thoughts, whether we want to or not, and they influence our every action.

“Happiness cannot come from without, it comes from within.” – Helen Keller

When we are still children, our thoughts seem to be purely positive. Have you ever been around a 4-year old who doesn’t like a painting he or she drew? I haven’t. Instead, I see glee, exciting and pride in children’s eyes. But as the years go by, we clutter our mind with doubts, fears and self-deprecating thoughts.

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Just imagine then how much we limit ourselves in every aspect of our lives if we give negative thoughts too much power! We’ll never go after that job we’ve always wanted because our nay-saying thoughts make us doubt our abilities. We’ll never ask that person we like out on a date because we always think we’re not good enough.

We’ll never risk quitting our job in order to pursue the life and the work of our dreams because we can’t get over our mental barrier that insists we’re too weak, too unimportant and too dumb. We’ll never lose those pounds that risk our health because we believe we’re not capable of pushing our limits. We’ll never be able to fully see our inner potential because we simply don’t dare to question the voices in our head.

But enough is enough! It’s time to stop these limiting beliefs and come to a place of sanity, love and excitement about life, work and ourselves.

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So…how exactly are we to achieve that?

It’s not as hard as it may seem; you just have to practice, practice, practice. Here are a few ideas on how you can get started.

1. Learn to substitute every negative thought with a positive one.

Every time a negative thought crawls into your mind, replace it with a positive thought. It’s just like someone writes a phrase you don’t like on a blackboard and then you get up, erase it and write something much more to your liking.

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2. See the positive side of every situation, even when you are surrounded by pure negativity.

This one is a bit harder to put into practice, which does not mean it’s impossible.

You can find positivity in everything by mentally holding on to something positive, whether this be family, friends, your faith, nature, someone’s sparkling eyes or whatever other glimmer of beauty. If you seek it, you will find it.

3. At least once a day, take a moment and think of 5 things you are grateful for.

This will lighten your mood and give you some perspective of what is really important in life and how many blessings surround you already.

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4. Change the mental images you allow to enter your mind.

How you see yourself and your surroundings make a huge difference to your thinking. It is like watching a DVD that saddens and frustrates you, completely pulling you down. Eject that old DVD, throw it away and insert a new, better, more hopeful one instead.

So, instead of dwelling on dark, negative thoughts, consciously build and focus on positive, light and colorful images, thoughts and situations in your mind a few times a day.

If you are persistent and keep on working on yourself, your mind will automatically reject its negative thoughts and welcome the positive ones.

And remember: You are (or will become) what you think you are. This is reason enough to be proactive about whatever is going on in your head.

Featured photo credit: Kyaw Tun via unsplash.com

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