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6 Signs That You Are Not Yet Ready For A New Relationship

6 Signs That You Are Not Yet Ready For A New Relationship

For many, the best way to get over a break up and move on is to jump into another relationship. However, this could be a mistake as you are still emotionally vulnerable and could be a victim for a more devastating situation. Carrying on a relationship requires some emotional stability and inner strength to keep on going. As they say, a relationship can never be like being single because it is a full-time job. Don’t sweat it out. Wait and be prepared for the real thing when it comes.

Here are some signs to prove you are not ready for a new relationship since you have not fully recovered from the former.

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1. You are still distorted

You still can’t figure out why your ex left you, or if you want to get back with your ex. You still value and cherish the moments you had so you find it hard to let go. You are seriously considering some breakup sex. That is to say, you are hoping that they will come back. You do not have that clarity yet and truly cannot harness what you feel. Before you get into a new relationship, you really need to be honest with yourself.

2. You are hurt

You still have some bitterness swelling inside you and you simply can’t let go. You wish you could have your vengeance or try to get back at your ex. Sometimes, you cry at your loss and you really can’t come to term with the fact that it is over. All that resentment has to go before you set yourself up for a new relationship.

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3. You are still holding on to something that belongs to them

You have something that kept you and your ex together for a while. It could be the memories, it could be their items, or the envisioned future that you hoped to shared together. You have this thing tucked somewhere in your heart, or in your closet, and you need to let it go before you move on to a new relationship.

4. You are afraid

Fear can be synonymous with love. You are afraid to get hurt again. You think every other person is like your ex and that they are out to break and hurt you. You do not want to risk anything. You aren’t ready to fight for what could be an exciting journey either.

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5. You are angry

It is one thing to be hurt, but it is another thing to be angry and not willing to forgive. You believe you have been wronged and that the Fates have played a fast one on you. Such bitterness won’t allow you to see the possibilities and the beauty that could be waiting for you just ahead. If you want to be happy and enjoy a new relationship, you have to be willing to forgive and be ready to appreciate what you benefited from in your past relationship, rather than what you lost.

6. You are lazy

The act of being broken makes you sort of lazy and weak. A new relationship has to make you feel alive, active, and full of life. You can’t be lazy and have dulled senses to get into something new. Most times, a relationship is meant to unleash our creativity and romantic capacities. If you are lazy and can’t give enough energy into a new relationship it means you have still not gotten over your former relationship. Be willing to give some energy. If you are going into a new relationship, push yourself to making your other half happy.

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Conclusion

Altogether, it does take a while to get out of a broken relationship and fully recover from the emotional pain. It is better and more important for you to fully recover from a broken relationship and face future possibilities in a new relationship. Taking note of these signs could be helpful in determining where you are at the moment.

Featured photo credit: http://www.compfight.com via compfight.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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