Advertising
Advertising

7 Reasons Why You Should Consider Giving Birth At Home

7 Reasons Why You Should Consider Giving Birth At Home

Before hospitals, mothers gave birth in the comfort of their own homes and their babies grew up just fine. Is it safe to do it today? What are the risks? What if there are complications? What if something goes wrong? Is home birth okay for a first-time mum? You obviously have a ton of questions on your mind. As a first-time mum, I had the same questions on my mind before finally giving birth safely to my daughter at home.

Here is why you should consider giving birth at home.

1. The comfort of your home

Unlike a hospital birth, you are not confined to a little space — you have the whole house to yourself. You can wear whatever you feel like wearing that makes you comfortable. It’s your home, every food is allowed and you can eat whatever you want to eat at whatever time. You also have the chance to practice a variety of labour positions to find out what works best for you. For me, lying on the floor and climbing up and down the stairs helped to ease my contractions. I have no idea how I would have done that in the hospital. Hospital births are more controlled. You are usually confined to a bed and your food and fluid intake is limited. At home, you know where the kitchen is in case you are craving for anything. After all, you are only pregnant and not sick.

Advertising

2. Less risk of intervention

Research shows that moms who planned to give birth at home ended up with fewer interventions, such as episiotomies and C-sections, compared with a group of equally low-risk women who had planned hospital deliveries. In my opinion, this is as a result of time management. Instead of letting the birth happen naturally, they want to speed up the process or make it happen at a desirable time for the doctor or mother. Planned home births have been associated with less maternal infection and fewer maternal interventions, including electronic fetal heart rate monitoring and episiotomy, along with fewer third- or fourth-degree lacerations and tears.

During pre-natal care, your health care practitioner will walk you through all the potential “what if’s” and discuss a backup plan with you. They have a good system in place for transfer to a hospital when necessary.

3. No restrictions

A home birth offers you the freedom to choose the number of people you want to share your precious moment with. Your husband can be there, your older children, your mum, siblings, your friends, and even the dog can be there if you like. At the hospital, this can be restricted to two or three people maximum. You can also have a more private birth, without the interruptions of hospital staff, and you won’t have to endure routine medical intervention.

Advertising

4. You are in control

Unlike a hospital birth, your partner is given the opportunity to be involved — he may catch the baby and cut the cord if he likes. You also have the opportunity to hold your baby right from the womb. There is no time constraint, you can hold and bond with your baby as long as you want. In some hospitals, the baby is cleaned and evaluated immediately after delivery, preventing mothers from spending time with the baby right from womb. The first hour after birth is when the baby is most awake and alert. It’s the perfect time to bond by holding your baby skin-to-skin on your chest and to start breastfeeding, which helps the uterus contract and reduces bleeding immediately after delivery.

If you settle with a hospital birth, when writing your birth plan or discussing the delivery with your doctor or midwife, specify how you want it to go. If you want to hold your baby right from the womb before they take him or her away from your sight to clean and evaluate, be sure to let them know. Otherwise, you risk missing out on that precious moment. For a home birth, cleaning and evaluation is done in your arms.

5. You experience a natural labor

If you desire to go through labor in a natural way, with no epidural and pain medications, a home birth should be something to consider. However, if there’s any chance you might want an epidural or other anesthetic pain meds, you won’t be able to order those in at home. If you want to remain in control of your body as much as possible, be an active participant throughout labor, and have minimal routine interventions, such as continuous electronic monitoring, then a natural, unmedicated approach to labor and birth will suit you best. If you choose to go this route, you accept the potential for pain and discomfort as part of giving birth. But that shouldn’t be something you can’t bear. Before epidurals, women gave birth without. Our bodies release endorphins during childbirth which serves as a natural pain relief. With the right preparation and support, mothers often feel empowered and deeply satisfied by natural childbirth. Unlike pain meds, natural childbirth techniques are not invasive, so there’s little potential for harm or side effects for you or your baby.

Advertising

6. You have the midwife all to yourself

During a home birth, you have your health care provider all to yourself. Your midwife is 100% focused on you and your baby. The midwife will be with you to provide support and help you through labor. They carry the same kind of equipment and medication you would find at the birth centre. Your midwife will also follow up to visit you and give you lactation advise after the birth. During the labor, your midwife will periodically monitor your temperature, pulse, blood pressure, and your baby’s heart rate. After the baby arrives, your health care provider will examine your newborn and do all the paperwork while you relax and enjoy your little one.

 7. Giving birth at home means lower cost

A home birth is relatively low-cost compared to a hospital birth.  A planned home birth might cost about one-third of the hospital birth’s cost. You can save a lot of money by choosing a home birth and invest it into baby’s essentials, such as strollers, cribs, clothing, and all the other necessities to make your adorable baby’s life on earth more comfortable.

Be mindful that home birth is not right for everyone. Your health care provider will caution against a home birth if you have diabetes, chronic hypertension, a seizure disorder, or any chronic medical condition. If you previously had a C-section or have developed a pregnancy complication, such as preeclampsia, or if you are pregnant with multiples or your baby is in breech position, a home birth might not be right for you.

Advertising

If you’re not sure whether you have medical or obstetrical problems that would keep you from having a home birth, contact a home birth provider and share your concerns over the phone. If there are no obvious reasons to rule out a home birth, you can make an appointment for a first prenatal visit. At that visit, the caregiver will do a detailed history and physical exam, as well as the usual set of lab tests. They’ll continue to assess your situation throughout your pregnancy and during labor, birth, and the postpartum period. If you’re a healthy expectant mother having a normal pregnancy and you have no medical or obstetrical risk factors, giving birth at home may be something to consider.

Featured photo credit: New born baby Leo via flickr.com

More by this author

8 Things That Will Happen If You Break Up With Social Media Little Things You Can Change For A Happier And Fulfilled Life 7 Things That Will Prevent You From Being Successful 7 Reasons Why You Should Consider Giving Birth At Home

Trending in Parenting

1 11 Smart Pieces of Advice to Help You Thrive as a Single Mother 2 12 Tips for Parenting the Strong Willed Child in a Compassionate Way 3 Coparenting 101: 17 Helpful Strategies for Divorced Parents 4 19 Youtube Children’s Videos That Will Help Make Your Kid Smarter 5 15 Insightful Parenting Books That Help Your Kids Start off a Healthy Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Published on September 21, 2018

11 Smart Pieces of Advice to Help You Thrive as a Single Mother

11 Smart Pieces of Advice to Help You Thrive as a Single Mother

Becoming a mother is one of the most difficult challenges a woman can take on in her life. Whether this happens the “natural” way, with the help of science, or through adoption, being in charge of nurturing another human being is a herculean task to take on.

Typically, when we think about parenthood, we imagine two parents sharing the responsibility and having each other to lean on. However, according to the 2016 U.S. Census Bureau, 1 in 4 children under the age of 18 are being raised by a single mother.[1] This is a significant portion of the population that often gets overlooked.

If you are one of these mothers raising your children on your own, you are undoubtedly aware of the additional challenges that motherhood has placed upon you, including the constant struggle to find sufficient time, energy, money, and support.

For single mothers who find themselves bogged down by their daily responsibilities and struggle to stay afloat, don’t be fooled by the belief that you have to do all. It is possible to thrive and live as a single mother if you take advantage of all available resources and adjust your priorities based on your situation.

1. Find your community and ask for help

As the sole caretaker of your kids, going through the successes and struggles of parenthood can feel isolating and lonely. You have probably developed a strong sense of independence because you’ve had to go at it alone.

Being self-reliant is necessary in many situations that you have to face, but do not fool yourself into thinking that you don’t need support from others. If you have family nearby, strengthen your relationship with them by visiting and talking more often. Find time to catch up with old friends or co-workers, and don’t assume they don’t want to hang out if they are not parents themselves.

Would you prefer finding mom friends[2] who have more in common with you? Use resources like apps, Facebook groups, and community events to meet local moms in your area.

After you have established a support group that you can depend on, don’t be afraid to ask for help. It is NOT a sign of weakness or incompetency to admit you can’t do it all, and others are probably more willing to lend a hand than you think.

If you feel uncomfortable burdening others, suggest trading favors such as taking turns babysitting. Because after all, helping is each other is what community is all about.

Advertising

2. Make peace with the past

Before you can move forward, you must make peace with your past and not let it define you or rule your life. Whether your journey to single motherhood was through divorce, death, or never having a relationship the father, it is crucial that you leave behind the feelings of abandonment or betrayal you may be struggling with.

You cannot change the past and the hurt you had to endure, but you can use the strength that you gained from overcoming those obstacles to work towards making the best life for yourself and your child. Learn from the past but live in the present and look towards the future.

3. Make plans and set goals

The daily repetition of trying to balance work and home life can make you feel like you are on operating on autopilot. However, it is imperative to set goals for yourself and to keep working towards self-improvement.

In your personal life, you can set a fitness goal (train for a 5k), a reading goal (read 20 books in a year), or a travel goal (take a trip to Europe). At your job, you can set career goals such as gain leadership experience, get a promotion, or earn a degree or certificate.

Spend time creating a realistic plan to on how you can go about achieving these goals. Not only will working towards these goals make you a more well-rounded and successful person, they will bring more purpose and fulfillment to your life.

4. Look for role models

A great way to jump start your plans for the future is to find a role model or mentor who is further along in their life or career experience. This person can be a great resource when you need guidance on what types of goals to set for yourself and how to achieve them.

It’s also important to have people to turn to for encouragement during difficult seasons of life. Someone who has been through it before can provide the most genuine reassurance that tough times will get better and that staying positive is best approach.

5. Rethink your priorities

Single parents have twice as many responsibilities to take care of, so priorities and expectations must be adjusted accordingly.

Know that you are not superwoman and striving for a perfectly clean home, no dirty laundry, and home-cooked meals for your kids every day is not a reasonable expectation. It’s okay to take shortcuts sometimes, like serving your kids cereal for dinner or waiting until the next day to wash the dishes.

Advertising

Don’t compare yourself to anyone else and let go of the guilt that you feel for being the only parent that your kids can count on. Give yourself a break and don’t sweat the small stuff.

6. Make time for me time

Even though it can be difficult to find, making time for yourself is critical to maintaining your sanity and well-being. Without a built-in partner to take over, finding time to be away from the kids must be done intentionally and planned in advance.

If you are sharing custody, use the time away from your kids not only doing productive things but also making sure you are taking care of yourself. Sleep, exercise, and balanced diet are not things that can get pushed to the bottom of the priority list. Also make time for fun activities, such as hobbies and creative outlets.

Even though being a mother is the most important job you have, don’t let it be the only thing that defines you. Time for yourself is more difficult to find if you are the sole caretaker of your kids.

Use the resources that you have to devote time to self-care, and you and your kids will thank you for it in the long run.

7. Stay organized

With so many things to juggle, great organizational skills are an absolute must in order to keep everything moving smoothly. Use apps such as Mint for your finances, Mealime for meal planning, and Cozi as a family organizer for everything from appointments and shopping lists to after school activities.

Maintain constant contact if you are sharing custody so that it is clearly communicated who will be responsible for what when it comes to your kids. Follow consistent routines in the morning and nighttime so that your kids also know what to expect on a daily basis.

8. Be flexible (Don’t be a control freak)

Although it is important to be prepared and stay organized, things don’t always go according to plan.

When kids get sick and have to stay home or babysitters cancel at the last minute, allow for flexibility by having a contingency plan for childcare and with your employer.

Advertising

For example, make a list of people you can call when you need last minute childcare, or talk to your boss in advance about working from home when emergencies come up.

Most of all, don’t let unexpected changes stress you out and ruin your day.

9. Learn to say no (Don’t feel guilty)

Single mothers have limitations in time, energy and resources that families with two parents wouldn’t be able to understand. Because of these circumstances, it’s important you let go of feelings of guilt and stop trying to do everything and be everywhere.

You don’t have to say yes to every single birthday party your child is invited to. Your kids don’t have to be involved in sports and extracurricular activities every night of the week.

Limit the things you do to only the ones that are the most enjoyable and meaningful for you and your family. Doing more things does not make you a better mother; simply a more tired one.

10. Live within your means

When you have to raise your family on a single income, budgeting and spending within your means becomes more important than ever.

If you have outstanding debt that is accruing interest, make it a priority to pay those off as soon as possible. Outlining a budget is the best way to visualize how much money is being spent every month on various things and what is left over.

Find ways to save money on the necessities by looking for sales at the grocery store, buying some things secondhand, planning out meals.

After the necessary bills are paid, determine how much can be spent on luxury items such as eating out, vacations, and going to the movies.

Advertising

Don’t let finances be a source of anxiety for you and your family. Keep your bank account in good shape while teaching your kids how to spend money responsibly at the same time.

11. Spend quality time with your kids

The time you spend with your kids is so precious and much more limited as a single mother. Make the time that you spend with your kids count.

Rather than sitting in front of the TV, take them on fun and budget-friendly outings to the park, the playground, or a museum. Use meal times as the perfect excuse to ask them about what they are learning in school and the friends they spend time with.

When your kids ask you to play with them, look at it as a privilege and an opportunity to bond with them, rather than a distraction or waste of time. Be present when you are with them, with no work or multitasking on your mind. Your relationship with your kids will absolutely reap the benefits.

Final thoughts

Being a single mother is not an easy job. That’s why it’s important to use all the resources available to you in order to make this job a little bit easier.

Using technology, an organization system and a supportive community are just a few examples of things you should utilize to your benefit. It’s also important to shift your mindset and be more practical when it comes to things like priorities and finances.

Most of all, don’t forget about your own self care. Only when you take care of yourself can you best take care of the people you love.

Single mothers are some of the most hard-working people out there, and you deserve to have a happy and fulfilling life.

Featured photo credit: Alvaro Reyes via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next