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8 Ways For Empaths To Avoid Drowning In Others’ Sadness

8 Ways For Empaths To Avoid Drowning In Others’ Sadness

Empathy is a value we wish to instill in our children from a very young age, but it’s important that we realize that it’s possible to be too empathetic at times. Many times, empaths find themselves putting others before themselves to the point that they feel emotionally and physically uncomfortable for absolutely no reason. Empaths carry other people’s burdens with them wherever they go, and find it hard to shrug these feelings off even when they become overwhelming. If you ever feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders, there are steps you can take to alleviate the problem before it becomes too much to handle.

1. Evaluate your feelings

Empaths tend to take other people’s feelings on as their own, and find it hard to separate themselves from the feeling once it takes hold of them. It’s important for you to be able to evaluate whether what you’re feeling is due to an internal or external stimulus, and act accordingly. Realizing you’re getting worked up over something that doesn’t directly affect you is the first step toward alleviating those dreadful feelings.

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2. Distance yourself

Once you realize the external source of your distress, move away from it physically and emotionally. If a couple begins arguing in a public place and you find yourself getting anxious, find another place to continue whatever activity you were engaged in. If a friend is going through a tough time, it’s definitely okay to help them out, but remember that it’s not your problem to deal with. Of course, you’ll feel bad for your friend, but you also need to watch out for your own well-being as well. There’s no sense in both of you being dragged down.

3. Know your vulnerabilities

It’s important that you know you’re an empath in order to avoid putting yourself in emotionally-driven situations that can be detrimental to your overall well-being. Also, take notice of where you physically start to ache when you start feeling emotionally overwhelmed. Some people get butterflies in their stomach, others get migraine headaches. Whatever the case may be, be sure to notice when this happens so you are able to immediately distance yourself from a stressful situation the second it becomes too much to handle.

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4. Concentrate on your breathing

Remind yourself that the problem around you is not your problem by focusing on your own breathing. Taking controlled, even breaths will help realign your mindset, and help you realize you don’t need to be involved in the situation at hand. After you’ve regained control, you’ll be able to remove yourself from the situation to avoid any further panic.

5. Set boundaries

As an empath, you obviously care deeply for those around you. But you still have to look out for number one. Set physical and emotional boundaries when you start to feel overwhelmed. Don’t be afraid to say “no” to an invite to coffee if you know it will result in the other party laying out their troubles in front of you. Don’t feel like you need to pick up the phone every time someone needs something from you. You want to be a good friend, but you shouldn’t do so at the expense of your own well-being.

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6. Visualize boundaries

When you do choose to be the shoulder for a friend to cry on, you also need to visualize symbolic boundaries between the two of you. Create an imaginary wall that allows you to see and hear your friend’s plight, but keeps you from taking on their problems as your own. Remind yourself that no matter how much you help, you can only do so much for them. It’s up to them to truly take the reins and solve their own problems.

7. Focus on own emotions

It’s okay to feel bad for a friend, but remember: you’re feeling bad for a friend, not for yourself. Don’t let their troubles ruin the rest of your day. You can empathize with them while you’re spending time with them, but once you leave the situation, you should also leave the feelings behind as well. Like I said before, there’s no point in both of you feeling down. If your friend drags you into a pit of despair with them, it becomes impossible for either of you to help each other out of it.

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8. Do whatever calms you

We all have coping mechanisms for when we’re upset for legitimate reasons. When you find yourself emotionally distressed for any reason at all, do whatever it is that helps you get back to baseline. Take a long bath, hit some golf balls at the driving range, eat some ice cream. Treat yourself! Focusing on pleasure will almost certainly alleviate any sympathy pains you’ve been feeling for a friend.

Featured photo credit: New York City | NYC | June 2010 / Nan Palmero via farm5.staticflickr.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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