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Every Couple Should Never Forget To Do These 10 Things No Matter How Long They’ve Been Together

Every Couple Should Never Forget To Do These 10 Things No Matter How Long They’ve Been Together

True love lasts forever, doesn’t it? Well, at least the majority of people believe so. However, it is not only the love itself that makes a relationship work for years; it is also about the people and what they do to make it work.

Just being together and being in love may be enough for the first year, but then you will need to try harder. Here are some things for couples to do in every stage of their relationships.

1. Go on dates

Whether you’ve just started dating or have been married for years, it is always great to go out together. Dress up and go to a restaurant, to the theater or just for a walk around a park.

If it is true love, you’ll always have something to talk about, from how both of your days were, to the deepest thoughts and feelings.

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2. Travel together

Nothing brings people closer than traveling. You make plans together, you see new exciting views, you get great memories to remember for years and, most importantly, you overcome difficulties together.

With age, people tend to travel less, finding many excuses not to go far away from home. Don’t be those people! Travel to a new place every year; that will definitely be beneficial for your relationships.

3. Do things together

It is very important to spend quality time together, whether you prefer watching TV together, working out, taking cooking or dancing classes, going for a walk or just staying up all night talking. The most important thing is to enjoy each other’s company.

4. Have your own hobbies as well

No matter how much you love your partner, being together all the time and doing every single thing together can be quite difficult sometimes. Having separate hobbies is a great thing in every stage of the relationship.

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One person can play video games, while the other one draws, for example. It will give you satisfaction from doing the thing you love and will actually make you miss your partner.

5. Have traditions

Traditions are a great part of every community, big or small. Traditions in a family are also very important.

Traditions can be different, starting from the more common ones such as celebrating big holidays and inviting all the relatives, to the small personal ones such as cooking pancakes for each other every weekend.

6. Hug and kiss every day

Many happy couples kiss and hug every day. Psychologists say that thanks to such personal contact, couples develop devotion and affection towards each other; it improves their spirit and they trust one another and feel safe.

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Such intimacy is crucial for every relationship.

7. Do the small things for each other

Surprising each other and making each other feel special is a must for any relationship. Paying a compliment, giving flowers, cooking his or her favorite dish, writing a love letter (or sending a love text if you must, but an actual letter is preferable), and bringing coffee to bed are all the great things to surprise your partner with.

Be creative and don’t forget to please your beloved all the time.

8. Share your responsibilities and help each other

The times when men were responsible for financial stability and women for household only are long over. Now, often both spouses work and provide for the family.

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Household responsibility should be shared as well. If you see that your beloved one is especially tired today, take his or her household responsibilities this time. They’ll surely exchange the favor in the near future.

9. Always be honest

Always tell your partner the truth, even if it is not very pleasant. Don’t let your loved one doubt your honesty. Distrust is one of the main reasons of losing the harmony in relationships.

Happy couples value honesty and are always sincere with each other.

10. Make love and talk about it

Physical love is as important as emotional love in a relationship. If there are both of these components, it is magical. Have sex regularly and talk about things you like and don’t like in bed.

Being open here is very important. Spice things up once in a while too, and do something different to make it more interesting for the two of you.

Featured photo credit: Beach Couple/Nick Page via flickr.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

Reference

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