Advertising
Advertising

Is There Any Way to Predict When You’re Giving Birth?

Is There Any Way to Predict When You’re Giving Birth?

When you find out you’re pregnant, all you want is to meet your bundle of joy as soon as possible. In movies, it’s simple and easy: A woman experiences contractions, goes into labor, and voila — the baby is there. In reality, it’s not that simple.

So, is there a way to predict when you’ll actually give birth?

When you browse for this topic online, you usually come across various pages and websites that will give you information about your week by week pregnancy and claim you can predict when you will go into labor. Some websites even offer a wide range of tests you can do in order to see whether you’re near labor or not. However, doctors agree about one thing — it’s not actually possible to know exactly when you will give birth. Experts still don’t fully understand what triggers the onset of labor. Your body starts preparing for labor up to a month before you give birth.

Some women aren’t even aware of this “preparing process”. But if you’re nearing the time of giving birth, pay special attention to the following signals.

1. Your baby “drops”.

The technical term is dropping or lightening, and it refers to the point when your baby drops lower in the belly and settles deep in your pelvis. For first time mothers, lightning usually occurs at the end of the third trimester, while mothers who have given birth previously may feel dropping just a few hours before they the baby arrives.

Advertising

So, how do you recognize lightening? You might have a sensation of heaviness in the pelvis and notice that pressure below your ribcage lowered. You will also notice that you can catch your breath easier than you used to, and heartburn occurs less frequently. On the other hand, increased pressure on your bladder will make you urinate more often. Some pregnant women feel pressure on pubic bones and are able to see in the mirror that their belly was lowered; others may not notice the difference at all.

2. You notice Braxton Hicks contractions.

Before your labor begins, you may experience false labor pains that are also known as Braxton Hicks contractions. These contractions are your body’s way to get ready for the labor, but you should bear in mind that occurrence of Braxton Hicks contractions doesn’t mean your labor has begun. You might feel these contractions in the third trimester, or even as early as the second trimester. According to experts, Braxton Hicks contractions are perfectly normal, and you have nothing to worry about. As for how you can differentiate them from real labor, Braxton Hicks contractions:

  • aren’t usually painful
  • don’t happen at regular intervals
  • don’t get closer together
  • don’t increase when you walk
  • don’t last longer as they go on
  • don’t become severe over time

Some pregnant women describe these contractions as tightening in the abdomen that often comes and goes. Most women also report that false contractions feel like menstrual cramps. When you experience false contractions, you usually don’t have to do anything. If they make you feel uncomfortable, here is what you can do to feel better:

  • Take a walk (they usually disappear when you change position or move)
  • Get some rest
  • Listen to music or take a warm bath to relax
  • Get a pregnancy massage

3. Your cervix changes.

This is also called ripening or effacement. It’s defined as a process by which the cervix prepares for delivery. After lightening, your baby gets closer to the cervix that gradually softens and becomes thinner. By the time you’re about to give birth, your cervix will change from 1 inch in width to paper thinness. Your healthcare practitioner might check for signs of cervical change with vaginal exams during your last two months of pregnancy. Effacement is measured in percentages, e.g. 0% means no effacement while 100% means the cervix is fully effaced.

4. Your cervix dilates.

Before giving birth, your cervix starts to dilate or open up. Dilation of the cervix is checked during a pelvic exam and is measured in centimeters. For example, 0 cm means there is no dilation while 10 cm means you are fully dilated. At first, this cervical change happens slowly, but you should expect it to dilate quickly in the active stage of labor.

Advertising

5. Your vaginal discharge increases. 

Between week 37 and 40 of your pregnancy, you might spot vaginal discharge that is pink or bloody. This is also known as bloody show. During the pregnancy, a thick plug of mucus blocks the cervical opening in order to prevent bacteria from entering the uterus and harming the baby. When your cervix becomes thinner and starts to dilate, this plug may fall out. Losing the mucous is, in most cases, one of the best indicators of labor (but it’s not a guarantee). In some cases, labor could still be days or weeks away.

NOTE: Bloody show isn’t dangerous. However, if the vaginal bleeding is as heavy as bleeding during your normal menstrual cycle, you should contact your doctor because that would be a sign of a problem.

6. You feel energetic.

You might wake up in the morning and feel energetic, eager to do something. This is known as nesting. Although it’s not quite sure why women feel this sudden outburst of energy, it is assumed it’s due to the primal instinct that leads us back to the times when physical preparations were necessary before labor.

When you start feeling energetic, you should do something: Take a walk, go to a nearby store, etc. Just make sure you don’t wear yourself out. Nesting can begin a few months before the due date, but it is the strongest just before delivery.

7. Your water breaks.

You probably won’t have the Oh my God, my water just broke moment from movies. Instead, when the sac of amniotic fluid that surrounds and protects the baby breaks, it’s more likely to leak from the vagina in a gentle trickle. If you’re uncertain whether the fluid that leaks is water, urine or something else, it is advised to consult with your health care provider or head to your delivery facility right away. Some women experience contractions before the water breaks, but in some cases the water breaks first. When this happens, labor follows soon, and you should call your doctor or midwife.

Advertising

8. You experience contractions.

This is one of the most obvious signs of labor. During your pregnancy, you have probably experienced false contractions that slowly prepared your body for the big day. It was already mentioned above how you can differentiate real from false contractions. However, most women usually recognize they are dealing with real contractions because they become longer and more severe as they go on. Most doctors create a “plan” for when you will call or head to the delivery room (for example, if contractions last for around one minute, etc.).

When should you call your doctor or midwife?

Toward the end of your pregnancy, your health care provider will give you clear guidelines for when to let him or her know about your contractions or at what point you should go to the hospital. These instructions depend on your condition, and they vary from mother to mother. However, if you suspect there’s a problem with your baby, you should also make sure you call your doctor.

For example, call your doctor right away if:

  • your baby is less active
  • your water breaks
  • you experience heavy vaginal bleeding, in some cases coupled with fever and abdominal pain
  • you experience signs of preterm labor
  • you experience vision changes, headaches, pain in upper abdomen or other symptoms of preeclampsia.

Conclusion

Although it’s not quite possible to predict when you will give birth, there are some signs that will indicate the big day is near. In the meantime, all you can do is rest and prepare for the arrival of your child.

Advertising

References

http://www.webmd.com/baby/tc/pregnancy-dropping-lightening-topic-overview

http://www.babycenter.com/0_signs-of-labor_181.bc?showAll=true

http://www.webmd.com/baby/guide/true-false-labor

http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/labor-and-delivery/in-depth/signs-of-labor/art-20046184?pg=2

https://www.consumerhealthdigest.com/pregnancy-center/

Featured photo credit: Shutterstock via shutterstock.com

More by this author

Evlin Symon

Evlin Symon is a health and wellness expert specialized in fitness, weight loss, pregnancy, nutrition and beauty.

The Truth Behind Keto Weight Loss: Does This Diet Plan Actually Work? 15 Most Effective and Nutritious Healthy Foods to Lose Weight Is Saturated Fat Bad for Your Health? (And How to Eat Healthy Fat) 15 of the Best Fruits for Weight Loss and How to Enjoy Them Daily 10 Things You Should Know In 18th Week of Pregnancy

Trending in Parenting

1 How to Raise a Confident Child with Grit 2 An Expert Parenting Guide to Dealing with Toddler Tantrums 3 How to Enjoy Parenting Teens and Help Your Kids Thrive 4 What Makes A Great Place to Work Whilst Pregnant 5 How to Support a Working Mother as a Working Father

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on May 24, 2019

How to Raise a Confident Child with Grit

How to Raise a Confident Child with Grit

My husband and I facilitate a couple’s marriage and parenting group. Recently, the group discussed qualities, characteristics, and traits we wanted to see our children develop as they grow up. One term that came up that all parents seemed to upon agree as a highly valued trait was that of grit. The question from our group was:

“Can grit be taught to our children?”

The answer is, yes. Parents can help their child develop grit.

What is grit? Dr. Angela Duckworth is the top researcher on this subject and wrote the book Grit. She defines grit as “passion and perseverance for long term goals”. This new buzz word is popular in the adult realm, but what about our developing children? What if we could help our children develop grit as young children.

Grit is more crucial to success than IQ. Duckworth, through her research at Harvard, found that having grit was a better predictor for an individual’s success than IQ. This means having the smartest kid in the room doesn’t ensure any level of success in their future. They can be brilliant, but if they aren’t properly intrinsically motivated, they won’t be successful.

Grit determines long term success. If a child can’t pick themselves up and try again after a failure, then how are they going to be able to do it as adult?

What a gift it would be to our children to engage them in a manner that helps them recognize their passions, talents, and develop a persevere to purse their goals. Below are some tips on how to raise a confident child with grit.

1. Encouragement is Key

When a child wants to learn how to ride a bike, do they keep going after they fall down or do they quit after the first fall?

If they aren’t encouraged to get up and try again, and instead are coddled and told they can try again some other day, then they are being taught to play it safe.

Safe and coddled don’t exactly go hand-in-hand with building up grit. The child needs to be encouraged to try again. This can be a parent saying “you can do it, I believe in you” and “I know that even if you fall again you will try again and eventually you will get the hang of it”.

Encouragement to keep trying so that they can build up perseverance is very helpful in building a child’s confidence. This confidence is what will help them strike out and try again.

If they feel that they can’t do it or shouldn’t do it, then they won’t. The mind is a powerful thing. If a child believes that they can’t be successful in doing something, then they won’t be successful. Part of building that mentality of believing in themselves comes from encouragement from their parents, care givers, and teachers.

Cheer Them On

How many times have you heard a story of success that someone had in life that all began because someone believed in that person?

Advertising

A coach, a mom, a teacher can have a huge impact by believing in the child’s ability to be successful and voicing that encouragement to them. Words are powerful. Use them to build up a child, by telling them that they can do it even if they have try again and again.

Be their support system by being their cheerleader. Cheerleaders don’t just cheer when the team is winning. They cheer words of encouragement to keep the team going.

The same goes with children. We need to cheer for their successes, but also cheer for them to keep going and fighting the fight when life gets tough!

You Can’t Force Them

Keep in mind that you can’t force a child to keep trying. They have to do it themselves.

For example, when my daughter was learning to tie her shoes, it was a real struggle. She gave up. I couldn’t make her want to try to do it again. She had to take a break from the struggle for a few months and then try again.

She was more successful the second time around, because she had matured and her fine motor skills had improved. It would have been ridiculous for me to force her to practice tying her shoes for the three or four months in between, with tears and arguing taking place.

No, instead we took a break. She tried again later. Forcing her to learn something that she wasn’t ready to learn would have pit us against one another. That would have been a poor parenting move.

There are boundaries that parents can set though in some cases. For example, if your child begins an activity and wants to quit mid-season because they are terrible at the sport, you have the opportunity to keep them in the sport through the end of the season to show them that quitting is not an option.

Although they may not win another tennis match the rest of the season or win another swimming race all year long, finishing the commitment is important. It will help with the development of grit by teaching them to persevere through the defeat. It is character building.

If your child is great at all things all the time, they will not develop grit. They need to try things that challenge them. When they aren’t the best at something, or for that matter, the worst, it creates an opportunity for them feel real struggle. Real struggle builds real character.

2. Get Them out of Their Comfort Zone

My daughter wanted to try cheerleading this past fall. She has never done this activity in the past, nor is she particularly coordinated (sorry sweetie). For that matter, she couldn’t even do a cartwheel when cheer season began.

However, we signed up because she was so excited to become a cheerleader. I signed up to coach because there was a need for more cheer coaches. We were all-in at that point.

Once the season began, I quickly realized that cheerleading was far outside my daughter’s comfort zone. The idea of cheerleading was great in her mind. The reality of memorizing cheers and learning physical skills that were hard for her made the experience a struggle. She wanted to quit. I said to her “no, you were the one who wanted to do this, so we finish what we started.” I had to say this more than once. I don’t think anyone on the squad knew this was the case, because she kept at it.

Advertising

She kept practicing those cheers every evening. It did not come naturally to her at first, so it was uncomfortable. She always seemed to be half a beat behind the other cheerleaders, which made it very awkward and uncomfortable for her. However, letting her know that quitting mid-season was not an option made her try harder. She wanted to learn the cheers so she wouldn’t stand out on the squad as the girl who didn’t know what she is doing.

By the end of the season, she became a decent cheerleader. Not the best, but she was no longer half a beat behind the rest. She learned skills that were hard for her to conquer. Now that she felt success in achieving something that was uncomfortable and hard for her. She knows she has it in her to do that in other areas of life.

That is why it’s ok for us as parents to let our kids feel the struggle and be uncomfortable. If they don’t experience it when they are young, they will as adults, but they won’t be equipped with the perseverance and inner-strength built from years of working hard through smaller struggles as they grew up.

Allowing our children to struggle helps them build that skill of perseverance, so that they have the grit to achieve hard things in life that they really desire to accomplish.

3. Allow Them To Fail

Your child will fail at things in life. Let them. Do not swoop in and rescue your child from their personal failures. If they don’t fail, then they don’t have the opportunity to pick themselves up and try again.

If I had pulled my daughter from cheerleader once I realized that it was going to be a real struggle, she wouldn’t have experienced failure and struggle. Letting her have this small failure in life taught her lessons that can’t be taught in a classroom. She learned about the power she has within herself to try harder, to practice in order to make change happen, and to push through it even when you feel like giving up because it is embarrassing.

Failure is embarrassing. Learning to handle embarrassment is taking on a fear. When kids learn to do this at a young age, it is practice for adult life. They will experience failure as an adult. They will be better equipped to handle life’s disappointments and failures if they have learned to handle the fear of embarrassment and failure when they are young.

Practice builds up the skill. Processing and handling fear, embarrassment, and failure are skills.

If I had pulled my daughter from cheer and allowed her to quit, I would have taken from her the opportunity to learn how to process and handle the embarrassment and failure she was experiencing at each practice and games. She learned to keep trying and that practicing the skills would lessen the embarrassment and feelings of failure.

Learning the value of practice and how to preserve through the fear and failure are priceless lessons. We may want to rescue our children because we want them to be successful at the things that they do, but how will they be successful in this competitive world as adults if they are provided with only opportunities in which they succeed?

Failure is needed to learn to thrive. Success in adulthood does not come easy to children who are protected from failure because they haven’t built up the ability to persevere.

Perseverance comes when they have learned time and time again how to take the fear of embarrassment and failure head on and practice to get better.

4. Teach Them to Try Again

Encourage your child to try again. Don’t let them quit on the first try.

Advertising

Life is hard. If we quit the first time we tried at things, we would never amount to anything in life. We need to teach our children that trying again is simply part of life.

Help them to give it a go by providing encouragement and support. Offer to practice with them, provide them with tutoring or coaching if necessary — whatever it takes to get them back on the proverbial horse and trying again.

Break it Down

Sometimes failure occurs because they are trying something all at one time and they haven’t mastered the smaller components.

For example, a math student isn’t going to jump into calculus as their first high school math course. No, of course not. They build on their skills. They begin with basic math, then algebra, geometry, trigonometry, and pre-calculus to then they get to the calculus level.

If they are thrown into the deep end by taking on calculus before the foundation of their math skills are built, they will fail.

Help your child try again by breaking down what it is they are trying to achieve.

Going back to my cheer example… my daughter was not the best at learning the cheers when we began. It then dawned on me that we needed to break down each cheer phrase by phrase. Once we learned the phrase and movements that went with it, we could then learn the next one. Once these were learned, we could combine the phrases, practice them together, and then try to move to learn the next phrase in the cheer. It was a tedious process, but it worked.

Not all skills come easy for kids. Helping them learn the skill of breaking things down into manageable tasks is another way we teach them about grit. They are learning to build skills by persisting, practicing, and building upon previous experience, knowledge, and skills.

Grit is put into practice in childhood when they learn how to break down large tasks into smaller achievable tasks in order to build toward a greater goal.

5. Let Them Find Their Passion

Your child may be a wonderful pianist. However, if they aren’t passionate about the skill, then they likely won’t be happy or fulfilled in becoming a concert pianist.

It’s great to help your child discover their talents, but also let them discover what they are passionate about in life.

True success will come because they are passionate about the activity, not because they are the best. The best usually become that way because they are passionate first. Therefore, let your child experience a variety of activities and interests so that they can discover what they love to do.

6. Praise Their Efforts, Not the Outcome

Praising their efforts keeps them motivated and trying. If you focus on outcome, then when they fail, they will become defeated and discouraged.

Advertising

Focusing on the fact that they tried hard and pointing out specific ways that they did well in terms of effort will support them in trying again. When you make a habit of focusing on outcome, then failures are avoided at all costs, including taking risks.

Risks are needed in order to become successful. Therefore, make a habit of praising their efforts, even when the outcome is not what they had hoped and tried for, because eventually, if they keep trying their efforts will result in success.

7. Be a Model of Grit

If you are a parent or a caregiver for a child, then you are a model to that child. Children naturally look up to the adults in their life that are closest to them, especially their parents. They will look at your ability to persevere and achieve. Your grit will show.

Your children are watching. They may not know the term grit, but they will learn about working hard, not giving up, trying again after failure, and all that grit entails from your actions.

How you handle life is being watched by your children. You can work on your own grit by reading Angela Duckworth’s book Grit .

Develop a Growth Mindset

Helping your child develop a growth mindset is also helpful to your child in their development of grit. Dr. Dweck, author of Growth Mindset and researcher at Stanford, developed a theory of fixed versus growth mindset.

Basically, what it means is that if you have a fixed mindset, you will fear failure and easily give up. Someone with a growth mindset believes that their talents, skills, and abilities can be improved with hard work and learning. Parents and caregivers can help with the development of a growth mindset.

    Some of the ways that a growth mindset can be developed include:

    • Teaching your child how the brain works: neuron connections, right brain versus left brain.
    • Teach them to set goals.
    • Teach them to have a “can do” attitude.
    • Teach them to develop a strategy when they want to achieve something.
    • Teach them that mistakes are an opportunity to learn.
    • Teach them that failure is a normal part of life.
    • Teach them about self talk: Self Talk Determines Your Success

    There are a great deal of activities and materials online for helping your child develop a growth mindset including these resources below (each site contains at least some free content):

    The Bottom Line

    Grit is not just for adults, it is something we can help our children develop. Grit is more critical to success than IQ, so we should be helping our children develop this quality early in life.

    As a parent, being a model of grit, is one of the first ways to help our children become “gritty”.

    Featured photo credit: Gabriela Braga via unsplash.com

    Read Next