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How To Approach Women Without Being Creepy

How To Approach Women Without Being Creepy

Have you ever seen a creepy guy freak out a woman by simply talking to her? I have seen it many times. Whenever I do, my stomach turns upside down. In fact, not so long ago I was one of those guys. After I had ordered more products on picking up girls than my credit card could deal with, I was excited and motivated to test everything I had learned. I was ready to become one of the greatest seducers of all time. I was ready to be a real life Don Juan. I was ready for it all.

Or, so I thought. Turns out, what I wasn’t ready for was the truth. I thought that my way of approaching women resembled the videos of those guys who did this for a living. However, what I really looked like was an insecure little boy who tried to sell some stuff that he didn’t believe in.

I made every mistake that you can possibly make. I think it goes without saying… but I creeped out a lot of women on my road to dating success. What I also didn’t know back then is that this behavior is completely normal for a lot of guys.

They see something crazy in a YouTube video, expect that it works with every single girl on the planet and they jump right into it, without thinking about whether or not their actions make any sense. Of course you can take the same road as I took and get calibrated after experiencing one rejection after another.

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You can do that, but you can also choose another path. Check out these following five ways that give women the creeps and avoid them like the plague. Allow yourself to take the shortcut to success.

Don’t touch her before she sees you

Approaching women sounds ridiculously easy in theory, but the truth is that you can already make the first big mistake before you even talk to her. You might have seen some crazy pick up artist running up to a girl from behind, touching her neck and getting away with it. However, just because it’s on YouTube doesn’t mean that it is a good idea to do it.

Don’t get me wrong, running up to a girl from behind is absolutely okay. What’s not okay is to touch her before she sees you. When you run up to a girl who is walking in front of you, you have to make sure that she sees your face before you say the first word, and especially before you touch her.

Everything else will most likely scare her so much that the last thing she wants is to go on a date with you. She doesn’t know if you are a thief, a rapist, or just a decent guy who wants to get to know her until she sees your friendly face.

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Respect her private space

What do you do after you showed her that you are just a friendly guy who wants to get to know her? According to a lot of self-proclaimed pick up artists this is the right time to show that you are the strong and aggressive alpha man that can crush a rock with his bare hands. As a result of this delusional obsession with the alpha male archetype, a lot of guys give women the creeps by disrespecting their private space.

I know that the guy in the video course said that you should be as alpha as possible, but that doesn’t mean that you should stand so close to her that she can already smell the haze of your armpits. That’s a bit too alpha.

Instead of scaring her away by standing in front of her like a bouncer, you should rather approach her with a confident but friendly vibe without being too pushy. Give her some air to breathe and she will give you some time to say what you want to say.

Don’t stare at her like a serial killer

Another big mistake that a lot of guys make is to assume that they not only have to look like a strong alpha dude, but that they also have to stare like one. I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy talking to someone who looks as if he wants to rip me into two pieces.

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I’m not saying that you have to put on a fake Hollywood smile to cast a spell over a woman. All I want to say is that staring at her like a serial killer is not particularly helpful. Unless you learn to project your confidence without looking as if you have to battle with really nasty diarrhea, you will always be the guy who gives her the creeps.

Watch your body language

If there is one thing that makes women more uncomfortable than a guy who tries to take being alpha to the next level is a guy who shows that he is extremely nervous. Don’t get this the wrong way. It is absolutely fine to be a bit nervous and to have one or two bloopers.

If you; however, start to speak faster than the road runner says “meep meep” and start swinging your arms as if you were an octopus that swallowed too much ecstasy, you’ll get nowhere fast. You have to calm down. Breathe in, breathe out. Focus all your energy on your body language.

You don’t need the body language of James Bond to impress women. Standing in a relaxed way and controlling your gesticulation is all that is needed. Oh, and stop fumbling around with your zipper.

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Understand when “no” means “no”

The inability (or the unwillingness) to understand that a serious “no” actually means “no” is the fastest way to creep out a woman. I don’t know why, but some guys actually believe that a woman means “yes” when she says “no”.

Well, in some cases this is true, but only if she says it sarcastically with a big smile on her face while she is playing with her hair. When she says it with a serious facial expression and a defensive body language you can be 100% sure that she really means “no”. It is your job to respect her decision.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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