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How To Approach Women Without Being Creepy

How To Approach Women Without Being Creepy

Have you ever seen a creepy guy freak out a woman by simply talking to her? I have seen it many times. Whenever I do, my stomach turns upside down. In fact, not so long ago I was one of those guys. After I had ordered more products on picking up girls than my credit card could deal with, I was excited and motivated to test everything I had learned. I was ready to become one of the greatest seducers of all time. I was ready to be a real life Don Juan. I was ready for it all.

Or, so I thought. Turns out, what I wasn’t ready for was the truth. I thought that my way of approaching women resembled the videos of those guys who did this for a living. However, what I really looked like was an insecure little boy who tried to sell some stuff that he didn’t believe in.

I made every mistake that you can possibly make. I think it goes without saying… but I creeped out a lot of women on my road to dating success. What I also didn’t know back then is that this behavior is completely normal for a lot of guys.

They see something crazy in a YouTube video, expect that it works with every single girl on the planet and they jump right into it, without thinking about whether or not their actions make any sense. Of course you can take the same road as I took and get calibrated after experiencing one rejection after another.

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You can do that, but you can also choose another path. Check out these following five ways that give women the creeps and avoid them like the plague. Allow yourself to take the shortcut to success.

Don’t touch her before she sees you

Approaching women sounds ridiculously easy in theory, but the truth is that you can already make the first big mistake before you even talk to her. You might have seen some crazy pick up artist running up to a girl from behind, touching her neck and getting away with it. However, just because it’s on YouTube doesn’t mean that it is a good idea to do it.

Don’t get me wrong, running up to a girl from behind is absolutely okay. What’s not okay is to touch her before she sees you. When you run up to a girl who is walking in front of you, you have to make sure that she sees your face before you say the first word, and especially before you touch her.

Everything else will most likely scare her so much that the last thing she wants is to go on a date with you. She doesn’t know if you are a thief, a rapist, or just a decent guy who wants to get to know her until she sees your friendly face.

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Respect her private space

What do you do after you showed her that you are just a friendly guy who wants to get to know her? According to a lot of self-proclaimed pick up artists this is the right time to show that you are the strong and aggressive alpha man that can crush a rock with his bare hands. As a result of this delusional obsession with the alpha male archetype, a lot of guys give women the creeps by disrespecting their private space.

I know that the guy in the video course said that you should be as alpha as possible, but that doesn’t mean that you should stand so close to her that she can already smell the haze of your armpits. That’s a bit too alpha.

Instead of scaring her away by standing in front of her like a bouncer, you should rather approach her with a confident but friendly vibe without being too pushy. Give her some air to breathe and she will give you some time to say what you want to say.

Don’t stare at her like a serial killer

Another big mistake that a lot of guys make is to assume that they not only have to look like a strong alpha dude, but that they also have to stare like one. I don’t know about you, but I don’t enjoy talking to someone who looks as if he wants to rip me into two pieces.

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I’m not saying that you have to put on a fake Hollywood smile to cast a spell over a woman. All I want to say is that staring at her like a serial killer is not particularly helpful. Unless you learn to project your confidence without looking as if you have to battle with really nasty diarrhea, you will always be the guy who gives her the creeps.

Watch your body language

If there is one thing that makes women more uncomfortable than a guy who tries to take being alpha to the next level is a guy who shows that he is extremely nervous. Don’t get this the wrong way. It is absolutely fine to be a bit nervous and to have one or two bloopers.

If you; however, start to speak faster than the road runner says “meep meep” and start swinging your arms as if you were an octopus that swallowed too much ecstasy, you’ll get nowhere fast. You have to calm down. Breathe in, breathe out. Focus all your energy on your body language.

You don’t need the body language of James Bond to impress women. Standing in a relaxed way and controlling your gesticulation is all that is needed. Oh, and stop fumbling around with your zipper.

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Understand when “no” means “no”

The inability (or the unwillingness) to understand that a serious “no” actually means “no” is the fastest way to creep out a woman. I don’t know why, but some guys actually believe that a woman means “yes” when she says “no”.

Well, in some cases this is true, but only if she says it sarcastically with a big smile on her face while she is playing with her hair. When she says it with a serious facial expression and a defensive body language you can be 100% sure that she really means “no”. It is your job to respect her decision.

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Last Updated on July 3, 2020

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

30 Small Habits To Lead A More Peaceful Life

In today’s world, true peace must come from within us and our own actions. Here are 30 small things you can do on a regular basis to increase your overall sense of harmony, peace, and well-being:

1. Don’t go to every fight you’re invited to

Particularly when you’re around those who thrive on chaos, be willing to decline the invitation to join in on the drama.

2. Focus on your breath

Throughout the day, stop to take a few deep breaths. Keep stress at bay with techniques such as “square breathing.” Breathe in for four counts, hold for four counts, then out for four counts, and hold again for four counts. Repeat this cycle four times.

3. Get organized and purge old items

A cluttered space often creates a cluttered spirit. Take the time to get rid of anything you haven’t used in a year and invest in organizational systems that help you sustain a level of neatness.

4. Stop yourself from being judgmental

Whenever you are tempted to have an opinion about someone else’s life, check your intentions. Judging others creates and promotes negative energy.

5. Say ‘thank you’ early and often

Start and end each day with an attitude of gratitude. Look for opportunities in your daily routine and interactions to express appreciation.

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6. Smile more

Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” there are many scientific benefits of smiling and laughing. Also, pay attention to your facial expression when you are doing neutral activities such as driving and walking. Turn that frown upside down!

7. Don’t worry about the future

As difficult as this sounds, there is a direct connection between staying in the present and living a more peaceful life. You cannot control the future. As the old proverb goes, “Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it won’t get you anywhere.” Practice gently bringing your thoughts back to the present.

8. Eat real food

The closer the food is to the state from which it came from the earth, the better you will feel in eating it. Choose foods that grew from a plant over food that was made in a plant.

9. Choose being happy over being right

Too often, we sacrifice inner peace in order to make a point. It’s rarely worth it.

10. Keep technology out of the bedroom

Many studies, such as one conducted by Brigham and Women’s Hospital, have connected blue light of electronic devices before bed to adverse sleep and overall health. To make matters worse, many people report that they cannot resist checking email and social media when their cell phone is in reach of their bed, regardless of the time.

11. Make use of filtering features on social media

You may not want to “unfriend” someone completely, however you can choose whether you want to follow their posts and/or the sources of information that they share.

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12. Get comfortable with silence

When you picture someone who is the ultimate state of peace, typically they aren’t talking.

13. Listen to understand, not to respond

So often in conversations, we use our ears to give us cues about when it is our turn to say what we want to say. Practice active listening, ask questions, process, then speak.

14. Put your troubles in a bubble

Whenever you start to feel anxious, visualize the situation being wrapped in a bubble and then picture that sphere floating away.

15. Speak more slowly

Often a lack of peace manifests itself in fast or clipped speech. Take a breath, slow down, and let your thoughtful consideration drive your words.

16. Don’t procrastinate

Nothing adds stress to our lives like waiting until the last minute.

17. Buy a coloring book

Mandala coloring books for adults are becoming more popular because of their connection to creating inner peace.

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18. Prioritize yourself

You are the only person who you are guaranteed to live with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life.

19. Forgive others

Holding a grudge is hurting you exponentially more than anyone else. Let it go.

20. Check your expectations

Presumption often leads to drama. Remember the old saying, “Expectations are premeditated resentments.”

21. Engage in active play

Let your inner child come out and have some fun. Jump, dance, play, and pretend!

22. Stop criticizing yourself

The world is a hard enough place with more than enough critics. Your life is not served well by being one of them.

23. Focus your energy and attention on what you want

Thoughts, words, and actions all create energy. Energy attracts like energy. Put out what you want to get back.

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24. Assign yourself “complaint free” days.

Make a conscious decision not to complain about anything for a whole day. It might be harder than you think and the awareness will stick with you.

25. Surround yourself with people you truly enjoy being in the company of

Personalities tend to be contagious, and not everyone’s is worth catching. Be judicious in your choices.

26. Manage your money

Financial concerns rank top on the list of what causes people stress. Take the time each month to do a budget, calculate what you actually spend and sanity check that against the money you have coming in.

27. Stop trying to control everything

Not only is your inner control freak sabotaging your sense of peace, it is also likely getting in the way of external relationships as well.

28. Practice affirmations

Repeat positive phrases that depict the life and qualities you want to attract. It may not come naturally to you, but it works.

29. Get up before sunrise

Personally witnessing the dawn brings a unique sense of awe and appreciation for life.

30. Be yourself

Nothing creates more inner discord than trying to be something other than who we really are. Authenticity breeds happiness.

Featured photo credit: man watching sunrise via stokpic.com

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