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Advice For Dating A Woman Who’s Used To Being Single

Advice For Dating A Woman Who’s Used To Being Single

Women who are single are used to being independent. They find joy in the things they accomplish alone. Dating independent people like this comes with its own unique set of challenges. It is not as if they do not need companionship. They just might believe in playing their cards their own way, without any external support.

Here are some things you need to remember when you date someone who has always been single and is trying to adjust.

1. She does what she wants without letting you know first

She is so comfortable with being independent. She feels she can do her own thing without letting you know first. She would love to let you know, but she is okay with doing what she wants to do without asking for permission from anyone.

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2. She can be rigid at first

She has always been determined and steadfast on her own while navigating through situations. When you come in it may mean that a little of her territory has been encroached upon. Expect her to be stubborn at first. Although this will fade, be willing and patient to help her realize that you are partner rather than a “stealer” of territory.

3. She will appear tough

She uses a strong appearance to intimidate others and protect herself. Eventually, they could pull down this veil of supposed strength. It is your responsibility to be patient and understanding. They know what they want. This characteristic they possess could help them filter through the process.

4. She will have overprotective friends

Her friends will be a shield for a while. They will be suspicious of you at first, although they only want to be protective of her. It is just that they are not used to seeing her with someone special. They just want to be certain that she is going out with the right person.

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5. She will want to take things slowly

She is so used to being with herself that she wants to take things slowly, rather than dive right into a serious relationship. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t like you, it’s just that she’s slowly absorbing the idea and trying to figure out a way to plug herself into the relationship.

6. She will have a hard time letting you do things for her

She is used to taking care of herself. It isn’t likely that she’ll see you being some sort of Superman coming to her rescue. She has lived so long in her single world that she would find it difficult to have someone else simply looking out for her. So don’t take it personally.

7. She can be afraid

Beyond the tough persona there is some fear and caution that exists within her. She is afraid of being loved. and being in love. She may have been hurt before, and just might be afraid of being hurt again.

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8. She will question your motives

She wants to get into your thoughts. She would love to know why you do the things you do for them. Since she is used to figuring things out by herself, she will like to figure you out whether you are real deal or not.

9. She will need her space sometimes

You may consider this strange, but she will need her space sometimes. She is used to spending most of her time alone in solitude. Such space and time allows her to think independently and figure things out. And this space makes her see you in a clearer light.

10. She will be reserved

She won’t want to reveal everything important about her life to you right away. It may take some time, especially for her to share the things that matter most and are dearest to her. She will want you to wait for such vital information. Perhaps when you do get to know her better, she will open up the raw version of her beautiful self for you to discover. It will be well worth the wait.

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Featured photo credit: http://www.flickr.com via flickr.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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