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8 Proven Indicators Someone is Lying To You

8 Proven Indicators Someone is Lying To You

There’s a good chance that anyone reading this has told a lie at least once in their life. Whether it was a little white fib or a convoluted, George Costanza-esque whopper of a tale, stretching the truth is something the majority of us do from time to time.

But would you tell so many lies if you knew how easy it is for others to tell you’re lying? Believe it or not, your body gives off a number of telltale signs when you’re lying- most commonly without you even realizing it.

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If the person you’re talking to exhibits any of the following, you might want to take their words with a grain of salt:

1. They quickly change their head position

When a person is asked a question and they’re preparing to lie when they respond, they’ll often move their head in an unnatural and uncomfortable manner. Whether they retract or jerk their head back, or bow it down, it will often be a sudden movement that contrasts with their previous body language. In doing so, they may be trying to avoid eye contact, and also reacting nervously to a question they don’t have a good answer to.

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2. They change their breathing pattern

When a person is lying, they become hyper-aware of the situation which forces their heart rate and blood flow to change. This tension also causes their breathing to become very heavy and labored. Watch out for them taking deep breaths, and listen to their voice, which will get more and more shallow as their breathing gets heavier. Such an involuntary, and otherwise unprovoked, change in their breathing pattern is a surefire way to tell someone isn’t telling the truth.

3. They stand completely still

You’ve probably heard of your body’s primitive ‘fight or flight’ mechanism. Liars who stand perfectly still are exhibiting the ‘fight’ defense, as they feel as if they’re holding their ground. During normal conversations, most people are relaxed and fluid in their movement. However, when lying, we often enter a rigid physical state because we feel as if we need to prove something. It’s a sign that we’re on guard, aware of every minute movement we’re making in front of someone we’re lying to.

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4. They repeat words or phrases

Liars will often repeat themselves ad nauseam when telling a half-truth or a complete falsehood. This is done for three reasons. First, they will repeat a lie over and over in order to solidify the ‘facts’ in their mind, so they can stick to their story. Secondly, they’re trying to convince you that they’re telling the truth by solidifying their words in your mind. Lastly, they repeat themselves in order to buy time to come up with the next part of their story. If they were telling the truth, they’d be able to recall everything without thinking about it.

5. They cover their mouth

When a person covers their mouth while speaking, they’re more than likely hiding something. Subconsciously, they’re putting a barrier between themselves and the person they’re talking to. It’s as if they’re shielding themselves from being heard, or making it seem as if they’re not actually saying the words that are coming out of their mouth. If a person puts their hand over their mouth while answering a question, they might be withholding information from you. Lies by omission are lies nonetheless.

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6. They cover vulnerable body parts

When a liar covers their neck, head, or chest, they’re exhibiting the ‘flight’ mechanism I mentioned earlier. Contrasted with the ‘fight’ response, being in ‘flight’ mode means a person does not want to be in the current situation they’re in. They feel physically uncomfortable and exposed, and are instinctively protecting the most important parts of their body. Watch for what a person does with their hands while they’re talking, and you might be able to catch them in a lie.

7. They shuffle their feet

Not only should you watch a person’s hands while they’re speaking, but also check their feet during the conversation. This also has to do with the ‘flight’ instinct, as shuffling feet is a sure sign a person wants to bolt from their current situation. According to behavioral analyst and body language expert Dr. Lillian Glass, shuffling feet is “one of the key ways to detect a liar.”

8. They babble

When a person gives too much information when questioned, it’s because they have rehearsed in their head exactly what to say, and exactly how to say it. They also feel that if they’re able to give a full story, they’re more likely to be believed. However, this often just shows they’ve anticipated what the other person will say next, and jump right into answering subsequent questions before the questions have even been asked. If someone seems to immediately have every answer for all the questions you have for them, they’ve most likely constructed a huge lie in their head and are ready to stick to it no matter what.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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