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7 Dating Habits All Mature Men Definitely Need To Leave Behind

7 Dating Habits All Mature Men Definitely Need To Leave Behind

Maturity demands an improvement in attitude and expectations. Perhaps when we were growing up we achieved certain goals by being immature. But when you’re a grown man approaching dating seriously, maturity demands that some habits just need to be thrown out the window. We want to be respectable, appealing, and the kind of person a future partner can be proud of. This is what maturity means.
When we improve our habits and mature, we are more likely to attract a great romantic relationship.

Here are 7 dating habits all mature men should definitely leave behind:

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1. Having someone talk to the person you are interested in for you

This is so lame. If you like someone you need to go and reach out to that person for yourself. Let them know your feelings and that you are willing and ready to go. It is cowardly to have a friend or someone else take that bold move for you. It isn’t just a sign of maturity to be the one to tell the other person how you feel, it is also the responsible thing to do as it gives you the best chance to make the relationship work.

2. Pretending to be who you are not

You find someone and you like them so much that you decide to pretend to be like someone else, thinking this will make a great impression. The truth is that there is no point acting quiet, serious, and careful when you are an exuberant, humorous, and impulsive person. Dates should be an opportunity for you to give the other person a heads up on who you are- and that means being genuine, real, and authentic. If you are a Christian, Muslim, or Jewish, let the other person know. You are being respectful by presenting yourself honestly and maturely.

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3. Letting your friends’ opinions determine who you date

Who you date is entirely up to you. You should know for yourself what you want from a possible partner. Rather than be indecisive about what actions you will take and inviting your friends to have a say on who you date, do the responsible thing and make decisions for yourself.

4. Discussing with others how your present relationship compares to other relationships you’ve had

Whether discussing how your relationship compares to your friend’s relationship, or how your current partner compares to past partners- making these kinds of comparisons is so lame. Every relationship is unique. Understanding this will leave you better prepared to handle the challenges that come with being in a relationship.

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5. “I will wait 3 days to call”

Perhaps this was a rule you and your friends followed when you were younger. Perhaps you feel that you have to step back and wait some time after a date to show your feelings to the other person, because you don’t want to appear needy. The thing is that following this conventional rule may leave you looking immature. If you are mature you understand that there are no rules or regulations when it comes to calling or texting someone you are really interested in romantically.

6. Ignoring someone you went on a date with because you’re not interested

You go out on a date with someone and you find out that the person doesn’t meet your standards. Instead of being honest about your feelings toward the other person you just start ignoring their calls and messages. It isn’t respectful to just grow cold on someone. Burning bridges after a date is not maturity. It is best for you to be respectful and tell the other person you are not interested. This offers them information that will help them to move forward with finding a partner, rather than being stuck speculating  about what to make out of your complete silence following the date.

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7. Secretly going through your partner’s phone

You may feel the other person is not telling you enough and getting the information you want is likely to be best achieved by going through their phone, email, or other password-protected accounts. Perhaps you did this while growing up and it gave you what you wanted to know once or twice. But maturity means showing trust, respect, and having the courage to love the other person even when you feel vulnerable.

Featured photo credit: http://www.flickr.com via flickr.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 26, 2020

How Relationships Building Helps Achieve Career Success

How Relationships Building Helps Achieve Career Success

As playwright Wilson Mizner supposedly said all the way back in the 1930s,

“Be kind to everyone on the way up; you will meet the same people on the way down.”

The adage is the perfect prototype for relationship building in 2020, although we may want to expand Mizner’s definition of “kind” to include being helpful, respectful, grateful, and above all, crediting your colleagues along the way.

5 Ways to Switch on Your Relationship Building Magnetism

Relationship building does not come easily to all. Today’s computer culture makes us more insular and less likely to reach out—not to mention our new work-from-home situation in which we are only able to interact virtually. Still, relationship building remains an important part of career engagement and success, and it gets better with practice.

Here are five ways you can strengthen your relationships:

1. Advocate for Other’s Ideas

Take the initiative to speak up in support of other team members’ good ideas. Doing so lets others know that the team’s success takes precedence over your needs for personal success. Get behind any colleague’s innovative approach or clever solution and offer whatever help you can give to see it through. Teammates will value your vote of confidence and your support.

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2. Show Compassion

If you learn that someone whom you work with has encountered difficult times, reach out. If it’s not someone you know well, a hand-written card expressing your sympathy and hopes for better times ahead could be an initial gesture. If it’s someone with whom you interact regularly, the act could involve offering to take on some of the person’s work to provide a needed reprieve or even bringing in a home-cooked dish as a way to offer comfort. The show of compassion will not go unnoticed, and your relationship building will have found a foothold.

3. Communicate Regularly

Make an effort to share any information with team members that will help them do their jobs more effectively. Keeping people in the loop says a lot about your consideration for what others need to deliver their best results.

Try to discover the preferred mode of communication for each team member. Some people are fine relying on emails; others like to have a phone conversation. And once we can finally return to working together in offices, you may determine that face-to-face updates may be most advantageous for some members.

4. Ask for Feedback

Showing your willingness to reach out for advice and guidance will make a positive impression on your boss. When you make it clear that you welcome and can accept pointers, you display candor and trust in what opinions your superior has to offer. Your proclivity towards considering ways of improving your performance and strengthening any working interactions will signal your strong relationship skills.

If you are in a work environment where you are asked to give feedback, be generous and compassionate. That does not mean being wishy-washy. Try always to give the type of feedback that you wouldn’t mind receiving.

5. Give Credit Where It’s Due

Be the worker who remembers to credit staffers with their contributions. It’s a surprisingly rare talent to credit others, but when you do so, they will remember to credit you, and the collective credit your team will accrue will be well worth the effort.

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How Does Relationship Building Build Careers?

Once you have strengthened and deepened your relationships, here are some of the great benefits:

Work Doesn’t Feel So Much Like Work

According to a Gallup poll, when you have a best friend at work, you are more likely to feel engaged with your job. Work is more fun when you have positive, productive relationships with your colleagues. Instead of spending time and energy overcoming difficult personalities, you can spend time enjoying the camaraderie with colleagues as you work congenially on projects together. When your coworkers are your friends, time goes by quickly and challenges don’t weigh as heavily.

You Can Find Good Help

It’s easier to ask for assistance when you have a good working relationship with a colleague. And with office tasks changing at the speed of technology, chances are that you are going to need some help acclimating—especially now that work has gone remote due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

Much of relationship building rests on your genuine expressions of appreciation toward others. Showing gratitude for another’s help or for their willingness to put in the extra effort will let them know you value them.

Mentors Come Out of the Woodwork

Mentors are proven to advance your professional and career development. A mentor can help you navigate how to approach your work and keep you apprised of industry trends. They have a plethora of experience to draw from that can be invaluable when advising you on achieving career success and advancement.

Mentors flock to those who are skilled at relationship building. So, work on your relationships and keep your eyes peeled for a worthy mentor.

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You Pull Together as a Team

Great teamwork starts with having an “abundance mentality” rather than a scarcity mentality. Too often, workers view all projects through a scarcity mentality lens. This leads to office strife as coworkers compete for their piece of the pie. But in an abundance mentality mode, you focus on the strengths that others bring rather than the possibility that they are potential competitors.

Instead, you can commit relationship building efforts to ensure a positive work environment rather than an adversarial one. When you let others know that you intend to support their efforts and contribute to their success, they will respond in kind. Go, team!

Your Network Expands and So Does Your Paycheck

Expand your relationship building scope beyond your coworkers to include customers, suppliers, and other industry stakeholders. Your extra efforts can lead to extra sales, a more rewarding career, and even speedy professional advancement. And don’t overlook the importance of building warm relationships with assistants, receptionists, or even interns.

Take care to build bridges, not just to your boss and your boss’s boss but with those that work under you as well. You may find that someone who you wouldn’t expect will put in a good word for you with your supervisor.

Building and maintaining good working relationships with everyone you come in contact with can pay off in unforeseen ways. You never know when that underling will turn out to be the company’s “golden child.” Six years from now you may be turning to them for a job. If you have built up a good, trusting work relationship with others along your way, you will more likely be considered for positions that any of these people may be looking to fill.

Your Job Won’t Stress You Out

Study shows that some 83 percent of American workers experience work-related stress.[1] Granted, some of that stress is now likely caused by the new pandemic-triggered workplace adjustments, yet bosses and management, in general, are reportedly the predominant source of stress for more than one-third of workers.

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Having meaningful connections among coworkers is the best way to make work less stressful. Whether it is having others whom to commiserate with, bounce ideas off, or bring out your best performance, friendships strengthen the group’s esprit de corps and lower the stress level of your job.

Your Career Shines Bright

Who would you feel better about approaching to provide a recommendation or ask for promotion: a cold, aloof boss with whom you have only an impersonal relationship or one that knows you as a person and with whom you have built a warm, trusting relationship?

Your career advancement will always excel when you have a mutual bond of friendship and appreciation with those who can recommend you. Consider the plug you could receive from a supervisor who knows you as a friend versus one who remains detached and only notices you in terms of your ability to meet deadlines or attain goals.

When people fully know your skills, strengths, personality, and aspirations, you have promoters who will sing your praises with any opportunity for advancement.

Final Thoughts

At the end of the day, it is “who you know” not “what you know.” When you build relationships, you build a pipeline of colleagues, work partners, team members, current bosses, and former bosses who want to help you—who want to see you succeed.

At its core, every business is a people business. Making a point to take the small but meaningful actions that build the foundation of a good relationship can be instrumental in cultivating better relationships at work.

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Featured photo credit: Adam Winger via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] The American Institute of Stress: 42 Worrying Workplace Stress Statistics

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