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12 Signs That You’re In Love With A Narcissist

12 Signs That You’re In Love With A Narcissist

For some reason, we’re incredibly attracted to people with deep, persisting flaws. For many, narcissists are one the most attractive types of people, even though they’re some of the worst people to be around. Are you in love with one? Find out by reading this list of common traits amongst narcissists.

1. They can’t or won’t admit when they’re wrong

A narcissist will not accept the idea that they could have been wrong about something. If someone you love argues intensely about something as innocuous as whether or not they took out the trash, you might want to watch your step.

2. They’re jealous all the time

Envy is almost synonymous with narcissism. If your significant other is scared of you even getting in the car with someone of the opposite sex, they could be a narcissist.

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3. They control the conversation

Conversations should be a give-and-take. If someone is always leading the conversation and consistently making it about themselves, chances are high that they’re a narcissist.

4. They’re too pretty for their own good

Beauty is often associated with narcissism. This doesn’t mean that if you’re in love with a very attractive person then you’re in love with a narcissist, but it is definitely a possible warning sign. If enough of the other traits on this list match the person you love, they might be a narcissist.

5. They think that kindness equates to weakness

Kindness in the face of adversity requires an inner strength, but a narcissist will argue that displaying kindness shows that you are weak. Someone who believes this is not worth being with.

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6. They think they’re the smart one and you’re the dumb one

A narcissist is often convinced that they’re a genius and you are not. Even if you both take an IQ test and you score higher, they’ll insist that there was something wrong with the test. No matter how much evidence is stacked against them, a narcissist will never accept that they’re not the smartest person in the room.

7. They get really angry

Anger is a clear giveaway of a narcissist, especially if the anger is over relatively inconsequential things. For example, if your loved one is mad at you for being a few minutes late to something, you better watch out.

8. They’re not grateful

Check out this list of thank you quotes. If the person you love is a narcissist, they won’t understand any of them. If you can’t get them to grasp the concept of gratitude, there’s not much hope for a healthy relationship.

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9. They don’t understand or accept boundaries.

If your loved one feels the need to be with you at all times, not giving you any time to yourself, they might be trouble. When you feel invaded, set clear boundaries. If they’re still ignored, narcissism might be the reason why.

10. They’re TOO honest

Narcissists are generally blunt bordering on rude. If someone always has to tell you the truth, even when it’s hurtful or especially when it’s hurtful, then they might be suffering from some significant character flaws.

11. They remember what you did wrong and forget what you’ve done right

A narcissist is often someone who’s keeping score. They compare the good things you’ve done to the bad, constantly looking for reasons to criticize. Even worse, they’re not counting properly. If someone you love only recollects the problematic things you’ve done in the past instead of all the good, they’re probably a narcissist.

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12. They never change

You might argue that nobody ever changes, but narcissists especially won’t budge from who they are. If you’ve deduced that you’re in love with a narcissist, don’t hold out too much hope that you can get them to become the person you need them to be.

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Matt OKeefe

Matt is a marketer and writer who shares about lifestyle and productivity tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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