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12 Signs That You’re In Love With A Narcissist

12 Signs That You’re In Love With A Narcissist

For some reason, we’re incredibly attracted to people with deep, persisting flaws. For many, narcissists are one the most attractive types of people, even though they’re some of the worst people to be around. Are you in love with one? Find out by reading this list of common traits amongst narcissists.

1. They can’t or won’t admit when they’re wrong

A narcissist will not accept the idea that they could have been wrong about something. If someone you love argues intensely about something as innocuous as whether or not they took out the trash, you might want to watch your step.

2. They’re jealous all the time

Envy is almost synonymous with narcissism. If your significant other is scared of you even getting in the car with someone of the opposite sex, they could be a narcissist.

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3. They control the conversation

Conversations should be a give-and-take. If someone is always leading the conversation and consistently making it about themselves, chances are high that they’re a narcissist.

4. They’re too pretty for their own good

Beauty is often associated with narcissism. This doesn’t mean that if you’re in love with a very attractive person then you’re in love with a narcissist, but it is definitely a possible warning sign. If enough of the other traits on this list match the person you love, they might be a narcissist.

5. They think that kindness equates to weakness

Kindness in the face of adversity requires an inner strength, but a narcissist will argue that displaying kindness shows that you are weak. Someone who believes this is not worth being with.

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6. They think they’re the smart one and you’re the dumb one

A narcissist is often convinced that they’re a genius and you are not. Even if you both take an IQ test and you score higher, they’ll insist that there was something wrong with the test. No matter how much evidence is stacked against them, a narcissist will never accept that they’re not the smartest person in the room.

7. They get really angry

Anger is a clear giveaway of a narcissist, especially if the anger is over relatively inconsequential things. For example, if your loved one is mad at you for being a few minutes late to something, you better watch out.

8. They’re not grateful

Check out this list of thank you quotes. If the person you love is a narcissist, they won’t understand any of them. If you can’t get them to grasp the concept of gratitude, there’s not much hope for a healthy relationship.

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9. They don’t understand or accept boundaries.

If your loved one feels the need to be with you at all times, not giving you any time to yourself, they might be trouble. When you feel invaded, set clear boundaries. If they’re still ignored, narcissism might be the reason why.

10. They’re TOO honest

Narcissists are generally blunt bordering on rude. If someone always has to tell you the truth, even when it’s hurtful or especially when it’s hurtful, then they might be suffering from some significant character flaws.

11. They remember what you did wrong and forget what you’ve done right

A narcissist is often someone who’s keeping score. They compare the good things you’ve done to the bad, constantly looking for reasons to criticize. Even worse, they’re not counting properly. If someone you love only recollects the problematic things you’ve done in the past instead of all the good, they’re probably a narcissist.

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12. They never change

You might argue that nobody ever changes, but narcissists especially won’t budge from who they are. If you’ve deduced that you’re in love with a narcissist, don’t hold out too much hope that you can get them to become the person you need them to be.

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Matt OKeefe

Freelance Writer, Marketer

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Last Updated on January 18, 2019

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

7 Ways To Deal With Negative People

Some people will have a rain cloud hanging over them, no matter what the weather is outside. Their negative attitude is toxic to your own moods, and you probably feel like there is little you can do about it.

But that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

If you want to effectively deal with negative people and be a champion of positivity, then your best route is to take definite action through some of the steps below.

1. Limit the time you spend with them.

First, let’s get this out of the way. You can be more positive than a cartoon sponge, but even your enthusiasm has a chance of being afflicted by the constant negativity of a friend.

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In fact, negativity has been proven to damage your health physically, making you vulnerable to high levels of stress and even cardiac disease. There’s no reason to get hurt because of someone else’s bad mood.

Though this may be a little tricky depending on your situation, working to spend slightly less time around negative people will keep your own spirits from slipping as well.

2. Speak up for yourself.

Don’t just absorb the comments that you are being bombarded with, especially if they are about you. It’s wise to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but being too quiet can give the person the impression that you are accepting what’s being said.

3. Don’t pretend that their behavior is “OK.”

This is an easy trap to fall into. Point out to the person that their constant negativity isn’t a good thing. We don’t want to do this because it’s far easier to let someone sit in their woes, and we’d rather just stay out of it.

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But if you want the best for this person, avoid giving the false impression that their negativity is normal.

4. Don’t make their problems your problems.

Though I consider empathy a gift, it can be a dangerous thing. When we hear the complaints of a friend or family member, we typically start to take on their burdens with them.

This is a bad habit to get into, especially if this is a person who is almost exclusively negative. These types of people are prone to embellishing and altering a story in order to gain sympathy.

Why else would they be sharing this with you?

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5. Change the subject.

When you suspect that a conversation is starting to take a turn for the negative, be a champion of positivity by changing the subject. Of course, you have to do this without ignoring what the other person said.

Acknowledge their comment, but move the conversation forward before the euphoric pleasure gained from complaining takes hold of either of you.

6. Talk about solutions, not problems.

Sometimes, changing the subject isn’t an option if you want to deal with negative people, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still be positive.

I know that when someone begins dumping complaints on me, I have a hard time knowing exactly what to say. The key is to measure your responses as solution-based.

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You can do this by asking questions like, “Well, how could this be resolved?” or, “How do you think they feel about it?”

Use discernment to find an appropriate response that will help your friend manage their perspectives.

7. Leave them behind.

Sadly, there are times when we have to move on without these friends, especially if you have exhausted your best efforts toward building a positive relationship.

If this person is a family member, you can still have a functioning relationship with them, of course, but you may still have to limit the influence they have over your wellbeing.

That being said, what are some steps you’ve taken to deal with negative people? Let us know in the comments.

You may also want to read: How to Stop the Negative Spin of Thoughts, Emotions and Actions.

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