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A Short Story About A Blind Man And A Window, The Ending Will Strike You

A Short Story About A Blind Man And A Window, The Ending Will Strike You

Most of us are imperfect. Some of us have the good sense to know this. Then there are some of us who transcend this. This is not to say that they are perfect, but they can see things much clearer than most of us. Such was the case with the blind man in this story. Though his physical vision was gone, he saw things that some of us never see. He saw the need that his friend had for happiness in his life and he provided this happiness. He saw that he had the unique opportunity to bring moments of happiness to a man who was unable to see what he saw. Rather than disappoint him with the truth, he fed his friend the happy visions of love and beauty that he so badly needed.

This happens in day to day life on a smaller scale. The situation is not always as impactful as this one was, but conceptually it is more or less the same. When your significant other comes to you and asks “How does this shirt look?” You understand that you are in the unique position to possibly determine the type of day this person may have. I’m not saying that we lie, but generally we will respond favorably. You and I both know this.

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As you walked to the bus or train station this morning, that person you smiled at and said good morning to, they were positively affected by your kind gesture. A good morning can go a long way for someone who is having a rough start at the day. Perhaps they had a rough night, and your “good morning” reminds them of the good in the world. Never underestimate the power of a kind gesture.

The story of the blind man comes in two flavors. The video version which will be discussed henceforth talks of a man who apparently has loss his sight. His roommate at the hospital is on a bed by the window and he spends his time sharing all of the amazing things that he sees outside with his blind friend. He brings joy to his buddy day in and day out by describing in depth, and with some humor the antics of a young couple outside and much more.

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The storyteller is seriously ill and requires some surgery or procedure. Sadly once they say goodbye, it is their final goodbye. The storyteller doesn’t make it, and his blind friend is left alone in the room. The nurse arrives and delivers the sad news. However, the blind man asks her to please tell him what she can see outside the window. She looks out and is confused, she then proceeds to tell him that there is nothing there but a wall. The blind man then realizes that his friend was lying to him the entire time, and he laughs to himself as if to say “You got me man.”

Deep down inside I know that he was happy and grateful for what his friend did for him. In life we all need friends like that guy to share happiness with us. There is so much struggle and negativity in the world today. A friend like his is priceless. Do your best to surround yourself with great people that care about you. People who are interested in making you happy, even if they have to transform a wall into a park, and a couple, and ducks, and water.

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As friends, we are obligated to be honest. This post isn’t meant to encourage deceit or lying, but if you do have the opportunity to help someone be happy without hurting them, then why not exercise it? That is of course assuming that the circumstances do not hurt or endanger anyone else either. This story was heart warming, touching, and the fib didn’t hurt anyone. In this case I can support the fib, but please use your common sense, we are trying to spread happiness, not pain or deceit!

Featured photo credit: Virginia Artaza via flickr.com

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Last Updated on October 14, 2020

The Art of Humble Confidence

The Art of Humble Confidence

To be confident or not to be confident, that is the question. I’m not sure about you, but I’ve been a bit confused about all this discussion about the subject of confidence. Do you really need to be more confident or should you try to be more humble? I think the answer is both – you just have to know where to use it.

East VS West – Confidence, It’s a Cultural Thing

In typical Western countries, the answer to the confidence debate is obvious – more is better. Our heros are rebellious, independent and shoot first, ask questions later. I think this snippet of dialog from The Matrix sums it up best:

Agent Smith – “We’re willing to wipe the slate clean, give you a fresh start. All that we’re asking in return is your cooperation in bringing a known terrorist to justice.”
Neo – “Yeah. Well, that sounds like a pretty good deal. But I think I may have a better one. How about, I give you the finger”
[He does]
Neo -“ …and you give me my phone call.”

In Eastern countries, the tone is often considerably different. Elders are supposed to be revered not dismissed. The words ‘guru,’ meaning a teacher, and the philosophy of dharma, loosely translated to mean ‘duty,’ come from here. In Eastern cultures humility and respect are more important than confidence.

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These perspectives are generalizations, but it shows how the confidence debate goes back deep into our culture. I think that both extremes of pure confidence or pure humility are misguided. Instead of rectifying this situation by simply blending the two: becoming somewhat humble, somewhat confident all the time, I believe the answer is to know when to be confident and when to be humble.

Humble Confidence – Know When to Use It

I’m going to make another broad generalization. I believe that virtually every relationship you are going to have is going to fit into one of two major archetypes, either master or student. In peer relationships this master/student role may switch frequently, but it is extremely rare that the relationship never leans to one side.

In the master role, you are displaying confidence to get what you want. This is public speaker, leader or seducer. Being the master has advantages. You have more control and ability to influence from this role.

The student role is the opposite. You are intentionally displaying humility. This is the student, disciple or follower. Being the student has advantages too. You can learn a lot more in this role and are more likely to win the trust of the other person.

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Know When to Shut Up and Learn

If you are a typical Westerner, you are probably already thinking about which role you prefer. Being the leader is great. You get respect and a higher status. Most of all you get a greater degree of control.

But the problem is that you can’t and shouldn’t always try to be the leader. Trying to assume that role without the skills, resources or status to back it up will lead to conflict. More importantly, there are many times when you purposely want to display humility. Some of the benefits to the student role include:

  • You learn more.
  • Smooths relationships.
  • Makes others more willing to lend a helping hand.

Knowing when taking the humble route is to your advantage. It is far easier to get mentors and advisors if you use humility rather than arrogance. A small sacrifice to your ego can open up the potential to learn a lot.

Confidence to Persuade, Humility to Learn

In reality almost no relationship is as clearly defined as master/student. Within our connections, people have overlapping areas of expertise. I might be an expert in blogging to a non-blogger, but they might be an expert in finance. In each area there are different roles to take.

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Before any interaction ask yourself what the purpose is. Are you trying to learn or persuade?

Persuasion requires confidence. If you are trying to sell, instruct or lead you need to display the confidence to match your message. But learning requires humility. You won’t learn anything if you are constantly arguing with your professors, mentors or employers. Taking a dose of humility and temporarily making yourself a student gives you the opportunity to absorb.

Persuade Less, Learn More

Persuasion is great for immediate effect, but learning matters over the long-haul. Instead of washing over all your communication with pure confidence, look for opportunities to learn. Persuading someone to follow you may give you an immediate boost of satisfaction, but it doesn’t last. Learning, however, is an investment for the future.

Whenever I make a connection with someone and realize they have a skill or understanding I want, I am careful to express humility in that area. That means listening with what they say even if I don’t immediately agree and being patient with their response. This method often drastically cuts down the time I need to spend on trial and error to learn by myself.

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Confidence/Humility Doesn’t Replace Communication Skills

This approach of selectively using confidence and humility for different purposes doesn’t replace communication skills. Humility isn’t going to work if the other person thinks you’re an irritating whiner. Confidence won’t work if the entire room thinks you are an arrogant jerk. Knowing how to display these two qualities takes practice.

The next time you are about to enter into an interaction ask yourself why you are doing it. Are you trying to persuade or learn? Depending on which you can take a completely different tact for far better results.

Featured photo credit: BBH Singapore via unsplash.com

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