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Harvard Research Finds Working Mothers Raise Successful Daughters And Empathetic Sons

Harvard Research Finds Working Mothers Raise Successful Daughters And Empathetic Sons

There are many posts on the Internet which urge working moms to feel less guilty about how they are raising their kids — they seem to be doing better than some may think. This has been confirmed by a Harvard study which involved 50,000 children of career women from 25 countries. Researchers found that there were considerable benefits for kids raised by working mothers. The study included women who were working part-time in addition to full-time professionals.

The study found that these children were more accepting of non-traditional gender-role models in the home setting. Later, this contributed to daughters being more successful in the workplace in supervisory roles and sons who were more empathetic. Here are six reasons why these sons and daughters are more successful at work and at home.

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1. Sons understand how gender roles have evolved

Both sons and daughters learn that a working mother is perfectly normal and that the woman’s role is not necessarily that of a housewife. In fact, according to the Office of National Statistics in the UK, the number of stay-at-home moms has decreased by more than 33 per cent in the last twenty years. Sons begin to understand that they too have a role to play in the running of the household. Later in life, they contribute more in childcare and in managing the home because of this early life lesson. In fact, the Harvard study shows that these men are spending twice the amount of time on childcare — 16 hours a week compared to the 8.5-hour norm.

2. Sons are likely to be more empathetic

Sons learn from an early age to pitch in and help out with household chores when their mother is away from the home. This makes them more sensitive to the needs of others. They will never wonder what stay-at-home mothers do all day. They are more likely to grow up being empathetic and caring, becoming better partners and parents themselves. There is no need to separate masculine from feminine qualities. A parent will teach their sons that there are only human qualities. The family with a working mom finds it easier to instil empathy in their boys.

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3. Sons are more likely to marry a working mother

Other studies show that sons brought up by working mothering are more likely to have wives who work. The reason behind this is that the sons have a less traditional view of mothering because they grew up in a home where working and mothering was seamless. They are much more likely to be supportive and helpful when their own wives work.

4. Daughters have a positive role model to follow

Instead of worrying obsessively about how much actual time they spend with their daughters, working moms should reflect on how they are setting a positive example of gender equality and success. Daughters are inspired by the example and have no qualms about their own careers when they marry.

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5. Daughters have more supervisory roles

The Harvard study found that daughters of working mothers were more likely to be successful and had more supervisory roles than those women brought up by stay-at-home moms. Twenty-five per cent of daughters of stay-at-home moms were in supervisory roles compared to 33 per cent of daughters of working mothers. These women were much more confident in holding down dual roles than their colleagues. The reason is that they had an excellent example to follow from an early age.

6. Daughters are earning more

The daughters of working mothers earn up to 23 per cent more (in the USA) than their counterparts and are better placed to gain more senior positions. That makes a difference of $7,000 annually in the USA. The reason is that these women are motivated from an early age to follow their own career choices, just like their own mothers. This is a crucial factor in their success.They were also taught to be independent and autonomous from an early age, as their mothers never had the time to indulge in helicopter parenting.

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Long live women’s right to choose when it comes to working or staying at home. If they choose the former, they should relax and know that that their choice will have a beneficial impact on their sons and daughters. It is high time to change the stereotypes and recognize quality parenting is much more complex than many people imagine.

Featured photo credit: Dad helping Ricky while Sara looks on/Joshua Blount via flickr.com

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Robert Locke

Author of Ziger the Tiger Stories, a health enthusiast specializing in relationships, life improvement and mental health.

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Last Updated on July 16, 2019

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

7 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Energy and Become Positive

Negativity affects ourselves and everyone around us. It limits our potential to become something great and live a fulfilling, purposeful life. Negativity has a tangible effect on our health, too. Research has shown that people who cultivate negative energy experience more stress, more sickness, and less opportunity over the course of their lives than those who choose to live positively.

When we make a decision to become positive, and follow that decision up with action, we will begin to encounter situations and people that are also positive. The negative energy gets edged out by all positive experiences. It’s a snowball effect.

Although negative and positive thoughts will always exist, the key to becoming positive is to limit the amount of negativity that we experience by filling ourselves up with more positivity.

Here are some ways to get rid of negativity and become more positive.

1. Become Grateful for Everything

When life is all about us, it’s easy to believe that we deserve what we have. An attitude of entitlement puts us at the center of the universe and sets up the unrealistic expectation that others should cater to us, our needs, and our wants. This vain state of existence is a surefire way to set yourself up for an unfulfilled life of negativity.

People living in this sort of entitlement are “energy suckers”–they are always searching for what they can get out of a situation. People that don’t appreciate the nuances of their lives live in a constant state of lacking. And it’s really difficult to live a positive life this way.

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When we begin to be grateful and appreciate everything in our lives–from the small struggles that make us better, to the car that gets us from A to B every day–we shift our attitude from one of selfishness, to one of appreciation. This appreciation gets noticed by others, and a positive harmony begins to form in our relationships.

We begin to receive more of that which we are grateful for, because we’ve opened ourselves up to the idea of receiving, instead of taking. This will make your life more fulfilling, and more positive.

2. Laugh More, Especially at Yourself

Life gets busy, our schedules fill up, we get into relationships, and work can feel task oriented and routine-driven at times. Being human can feel more like being a robot. But having this work-driven, serious attitude often results in negative and performance oriented thinking.

Becoming positive means taking life less seriously and letting yourself off the hook. This is the only life that you get to live, why not lighten up your mood?

Laughter helps us become positive by lightening our mood and reminding us not to take life so seriously. Are you sensitive to light sarcasm? Do you have trouble laughing at jokes? Usually, people who are stressed out and overly serious get most offended by sarcasm because their life is all work and no play.

If we can learn to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes, life will become more of an experiment in finding out what makes us happy. And finding happiness means finding positivity.

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3. Help Others

Negativity goes hand in hand with selfishness. People that live only for themselves have no higher purpose in their lives. If the whole point of this world is only to take care of yourself and no one else, the road to a long-term fulfillment and purpose is going to be a long one.

Positivity accompanies purpose. The most basic way to create purpose and positivity in your life is to begin doing things for others. Start small; open the door for the person in front of you at Starbucks or ask someone how their day was before telling them about yours.

Helping others will give you an intangible sense of value that will translate into positivity. And people might just appreciate you in the process.

4. Change Your Thinking

We can either be our best coach or our best enemy. Change starts from within. If you want to become more positive, change the wording of your thoughts. We are the hardest on ourselves, and a stream of negative self talk is corrosive to a positive life.

The next time you have a negative thought, write it down and rephrase it with a positive spin. For example, change a thought like, “I can’t believe I did so horribly on the test–I suck.” to “I didn’t do as well as I hoped to on this test. But I know I’m capable and I’ll do better next time.”

Changing our self-talk is powerful.

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5. Surround Yourself with Positive People

We become most like the people that we surround ourselves with. If our friend group is full of negative energy-suckers and drama queens, we will emulate that behavior and become like them. It is very difficult to become more positive when the people around us don’t support or demonstrate positive behavior.

As you become more positive, you’ll find that your existing friends will either appreciate the new you or they will become resistant to your positive changes. This is a natural response.

Change is scary; but cutting out the negative people in your life is a huge step to becoming more positive. Positive people reflect and bounce their perspectives onto one another. Positivity is a step-by-step process when you do it solo, but a positive group of friends can be an escalator.

6. Get into Action

Negative thoughts can be overwhelming and challenging to navigate. Negativity is usually accompanied by a “freak-out” response, especially when tied to relationships, people and to worrying about the future. This is debilitating to becoming positive and usually snowballs into more worry, more stress and more freak-outs.

Turn the negative stress into positive action. The next time you’re in one of these situations, walk away and take a break. With your eyes closed, take a few deep breaths. Once you’re calm, approach the situation or problem with a pen and pad of paper. Write out four or five actions or solutions to begin solving the problem.

Taking yourself out of the emotionally charged negative by moving into the action-oriented positive will help you solve more problems rationally and live in positivity

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7. Take Full Responsibility, Stop Being the Victim

You are responsible for your thoughts.

People that consistently believe that things happen to them handicap themselves to a victim mentality. This is a subtle and deceptive negative thought pattern. Phrases like “I have to work” or “I can’t believe he did that to me” are indicators of a victim mentality. Blaming circumstances and blaming others only handicaps our decision to change something negative into something positive.

Taking full responsibility for your life, your thoughts and your actions is one of the biggest steps in creating a more positive life. We have unlimited potential within to create our own reality, change our life, and change our thoughts. When we begin to really internalize this, we discover that no one can make us feel or do anything. We choose our emotional and behavioral response to people and circumstances.

Make positive choices in favor of yourself.

“Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habit. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny” ― Lao Tzu

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Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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