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10 Mind-Blowing TED Talks On How To Be Confident, Gorgeous- And A Better Person

10 Mind-Blowing TED Talks On How To Be Confident, Gorgeous- And A Better Person

1. Your Body Language Influences the Way You Feel

In this video, social Psychologist Amy Cuddy discusses research that shows how body language shapes your reality. Our posture and nonverbal communication not only influences how others perceive us – they actually change our body chemistry. Controlling your posture and training yourself in ‘power posing’ significantly increase your chances of success. You’ll not only seem confident, but actually be more confident! Try her tips and see for yourself.

2. Love What You Do


In this funny and audacious talk, Larry Smith, a professor of economics at the University of Waterloo in Canada, explains why you will fail to get a great career. He bluntly reveals the absurd excuses provided by people who are afraid to look for and pursue their true passions. In Smith’s words, “Wasted talent is a waste I cannot stand.”

3. Trust Your Feelings

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In this video, brain scientist Jill Bolte Taylor describes her experience of a massive stroke. Because she is a scientist with a vast knowledge of how the human brain works, she was able to observe her loss of body functions: speech, motion, and logical thinking. After losing touch with her rational mind, Jill experienced the ‘right-side’ brain- the purely emotional part of her brain- which she describes in her talk. It’s a fascinating story!

4. You Can Be Happy, No Matter What Life Circumstances You Face

Dan Gilbert, Harvard psychologist and author of Stumbling on Happiness, explains why most of us do badly in our lifelong pursuit of happiness. In his talk, he uses clinical research from psychology and neuroscience to prove we can be happy – even if everything goes totally wrong. He also says that getting things you want can give you exactly the same amount of happiness as not getting them at all. Check out his advice on how you can use the “psychological immune system” inside your brain to create your own happiness.

5. Embrace Your Vulnerabilities

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Brené Brown, a research professor at the University of Houston, offers deep insights from her 10 years of study into human emotions in this talk. She shares her personal quest to explain that embracing your vulnerabilities is the key to finding inner peace. In a funny way, she explains why accepting your imperfections, loving with your whole heart, practicing gratitude, not being afraid to apologize for your mistakes, and believing that you are enough are the major components of creating a better humanity.

6. Confidence Stems From the Belief That What You Do Is Right

Dr. Ivan Joseph, Athletic Director and Head Coach of the Ryerson University Varsity Soccer team explains in this talk why confidence is the most important skill in life. You need to practice confidence and be aware that you’re good at what you do. With this belief (and persistence), you can achieve anything. Joseph demonstrates the importance of self-affirmation, interpreting reality correctly, and accepting feedback positively.

7. Looks Aren’t Everything

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Cameron Russell, a gorgeous model, gives an honest talk about how superficial physical appearance is and how easily it can be transformed. She says that everyone is just a human being with their own struggles, whether you’re a model who won the “genetic lottery” or an obese man going bald. Everyone has to learn how not to feel judged. You should not feel overwhelmed by interactions with people who seem more attractive or powerful than you because every single person in the world has their own insecurities.

8. You Are What You Eat

Dr. Terry Wahls, a clinical professor of medicine at the University of Iowa, discussed how she used the lessons she learned about cells to cure her multiple sclerosis. She shows how she used her diet to help her deal with multiple sclerosis, which had led her to using a wheelchair. In her talk, she shows the importance of eating real, unprocessed foods and getting more of the vitamins, minerals, and essential fats our mitochondria need to thrive. In the talk she also discusses why she opposes the sugary, white flour-based products that fatigue us instead of giving us the energy to live.

9. Emotional Hygiene Is Essential

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Psychologist Guy Winch explains in this talk how neglected emotional pain can dramatically influence our happiness, success, and life expectancy. He explains that people go to the doctor when they experience certain types of pain, but neglect their emotional states (even though these can lead to serious medical conditions). Winch shows that changing your responses to failure, battling your negative thoughts, taking action when you feel lonely, and practicing emotional hygiene should be the start of your quest to reach your highest potential!

10. You’re the Only Person Who Can Define Yourself

Lizzie Velasquez, a 26-year-old motivational coach and the author of 3 books, was born with a rare disease which makes it impossible for her body to create fat. She describes the day when (as a 17-year-old girl) she discovered a YouTube video with 4 million views and thousands of mean comments naming her the “World’s Ugliest Woman.” In her talk, Velasquez gives her honest and powerful opinions on why you are the only person with the power to define who you really are.

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The Gentle Art of Saying No

The Gentle Art of Saying No

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

  1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
  2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
  3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
  4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
  5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
  6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
  7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
  8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
  9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
  10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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