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10 Things Only People Who Sweat A Lot Would Understand

10 Things Only People Who Sweat A Lot Would Understand
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On even a fairly warm summer day, do you sweat so much that you resemble a champagne bottle that has been taken right out of the cooler and left to condense? Do you look like Queen Latifa after a mile long run, even though you just walked out the door? Do you look like someone who’s been doing her collage paper at a place where there’s no air conditioning? Can do people have trouble figuring out if you just came right out of the shower or out the gym?

For people who sweat a lot, life can be difficult. These circumstances can be embarrassing. While people smile and welcome a sunny day in the month of May, you cheerfully wave it goodbye until August slowly – and thankfully – comes to an end.

They say, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” But what if we sweat everything – all the time. Big, small, long, short, hot, cold, good day, bad day… I mean: ALL THE TIME!

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Here are ten things only people who are prone to perspire would understand.

1) You Fear the White T-Shirt

Thanks to your pit-stain problems, you dread the white T-shirt more than any other color. They won’t last a day, much less a week when it comes to “being spot-less”. The only white shirts you own are either huge mistakes or not-so-welcome gifts. With so much whites in your closet, you must own a bottle of bleach. And of course, if you don’t have the time to bleach away the yellows from the whites, you’d much rather throw away the shirt. Unless of course, you prefer to show off the size and color of your stains.

2) You Have Unsuccessfully Tried Too Many Antiperspirants

The deodorant manufacturers talk about the “aluminum salts” that are believed to magically cure perspiration. You know it’s a sham, but you will still give it a try. No, not just one kind. You have tried, tested, and failed with several kinds. The roll-ons, the sprays, the cream-ish ones, and what-not. Yep, you’ve tried everything that should work to seal the sweat. What makes it even worse is when someone ever-so-kindly advises you try a product you are positive doesn’t work on you. Unfortunately, it doesn’t.

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For you “anti” with “perspire” is like “life” with “easy”. Is life ever easy? Thought so. Okay, let’s be thankful of the fact it helps mingle the smell with your own reek. At least, it works to conceal the secretions in its own deceptive ways, right?

3) You Envy Models with Everlasting Makeup

It’s baffling how make-up can actually stick to the face. Your face? Not suited to make-up at all. The only thing that sticks to you is your own salts. Being a Sweaty Betty has caused you to hate makeup altogether. Black eyes, under eye circles, smeared lipstick, and a melting foundation – you end up looking worse than you did in the morning, thanks to a layer of powders lathered onto your face. You wonder how the head-banging punk-rock female celebrities (Britney-types) manage to keep their face looking pretty throughout their stage performance. You know all there is to know about “melt-proof makeup”. However, even with that mascara and liner they promised wouldn’t “bleed”, you’re still crying black in no time.

4) You Never Raise Your Hand High Up

Waving your hand high up in the air like a brainy Hermione is out of question for you. For you, flying a hand straight up towards the roof means revealing the sweat-soaked under arms. Except for in front of cab drivers – who are probably too busy wondering how much you’ll pay them to get out of sun-struck agony. Let’s be optimistic. Let’s hope that’s all they care about and not their brand-new seat covers.

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You also avoid flailing arms at all costs. To be nice to yourself and others, you keep the arms low. Better safe than sorry.

5) You Shower A Great Portion of the Day

You envy anyone who speaks of showering only once a day – and means it. God gave them compassionate sweat glands, unlike your own. Stressful situation or not, you are likely to “break a sweat” at any time or place and in any manner. Showering to rid yourself of that stinky situation is your only chance of seeming “calm”. You shower before work, you shower after work, you shower before bed, and (quite possibly) wherever you find a shower. A great portion of your day is comprised of showering and worrying when on earth you’ll get the chance to do so.

6) You Have Never Been Known to Sunbathe… Except Everyday

For you, it would be a pleasure to heavily lather a sun tan lotion, lay on a deck chair, and give yourself a “sunbathe” like every other normal person out on the beach on a fine summer day. Unfortunately, you can’t sunbathe because you know you’ll drown in your own sweat within the first few minutes of “sunbathing”. Your sunny friend won’t let you get tanned. Oh no, my friend, you only get to bathe in your own sweat every time your sunny friend is around.

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7) You Dread a First Date

You sincerely hope that your date would either be the understanding type, or much like you, they also have a serious sweat problem. Nervousness and all, you’re always worried about your first dates turning out to be one of your worst sweat-soaking episodes. Checking your arms to see how much you’ve perspired is going to be tricky. If your date is not perceptive enough, expect them to ask you why you,occasionally peer into your arms.

8) You are Often Asked About Being Nervous

Even on a normal day and in a very normal situation, you run the risk of looking like a nervous wreck. Thanks to your sweaty palms and sweat-dripping forehead, you are often approached and questioned about your not calm composure. People tell you to relax or ask you if you’re okay. You are okay, of course – except for the perpetual and unconditional physiological response of sweating.

9) You Don’t Dress to Impress at a Night Club

Hey, a sleeve-less tank top would do. The last thing you want to do is wear a full sleeve shirt to a night club where even practically bare outfit would get you sweating in no time. Moving while you’re grooving and being the life of the party is great. But once the sweat starts to drip on the dance floor, you’re glad the lights aren’t bright enough to display your sticky condition. Dirty Dancing anyone? For a crazy sweater, out of question. Unless of course, your partner suffers from the same blessing.

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10) You Get a Damp Ass from Sitting

Sitting on your butt on a warm, sunny day can be quite bothersome – and embarrassing too. The last thing you want to sit up from is a damp-ass, sweat-soaked seat that you sat on for too long. To save yourself from the embarrassment of questionably sopping up a chair, you prefer walking around every once in a while and cooling off your rear. Not only is it unpleasant to let your sweat make a crime scene-like chalk outline complimenting your butt size, but it’s also inconsiderate to leave behind a swamp for the next person willing to sit on the chair.

Featured photo credit: Drops of Perspiration via flickr.com

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Last Updated on July 12, 2021

100 Incredible Life Hacks That Make Life So Much Easier

100 Incredible Life Hacks That Make Life So Much Easier
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Want to learn some quick and easy life hacks that are easy to do, low cost and saves you time?

By tweaking little things in your daily life, it can make your life much more convenient!

Here’re 100 of the most practical life hacks so you can just pick up any of them right away!

83 tie a small piece of bright colored fabric

    84 write random letter

      85 use a rubberband

        86 dorm smell bad

          87 lean your phone on your sunglassess

            89 how to waterproof your shoes

              90 take a picture of the name card

                91 iron inside out

                  92 old newspaper

                    93 tumble try shoes

                      keep a card like this

                        SONY DSC

                          94 soap bar

                            95 make a hole

                              96 drop the battery

                                97 use a coozie

                                  98 when taking a picture

                                    use a clean dust pan

                                      try a pants hanger

                                        use your cellphone light

                                          use a spring from an old pen

                                            quick and easy iphone speaker

                                              user binder clips

                                                wrap a wet paper towel around your beverage

                                                  put pancake mix in a ketchup bottle

                                                    clean out an old lotion bottle for your beach

                                                      use a muffin tin to serve condiments at a bbq

                                                        doritos are great for kindling

                                                          use nail polish to identify different keys

                                                            use a hanging shoe rack to store cleaning supplies

                                                              freeze grapes to chill white wine without

                                                                use paper clips to organize your cables

                                                                  almost finished your jar of nutella

                                                                    sick of having a box full of tangled

                                                                      unroll the rim to increase the capacity

                                                                        cut open toilet paper rolls and use as a cuff

                                                                          remove the stem from strawberries

                                                                            turn an old bottle into a simple little cord holder

                                                                              for iced coffee and iced cappuccino, use frozen coffee cubes

                                                                                how to fold a fitted bed sheet

                                                                                  tired of snoozing past your alarm

                                                                                    place a rubber band around an open paint can to wipe your brush on

                                                                                      ut a wooden spoon across a boiling pot

                                                                                        use bread clips to save flip-flops

                                                                                          take pictures of friends holding items

                                                                                            how i always know which headphone is the left one

                                                                                              put a stocking over the end of a vacuum

                                                                                                How to make sure you drink enough water

                                                                                                  user a can opener to open blister

                                                                                                    good sandwich guide

                                                                                                      turn your muffin pans upside down

                                                                                                        50 pounds of groceries and living on the 5th floor

                                                                                                          the right way to make a blt

                                                                                                            add one teaspoon of baking soda

                                                                                                              38

                                                                                                                hair straighteners equals to collar irons

                                                                                                                  stack your clothes vertically to see them all

                                                                                                                    the right way to make cookies in the summer

                                                                                                                      how to clean a blender

                                                                                                                        the right way to eat a popsicle

                                                                                                                          use bread clips to label and organize power cords

                                                                                                                            to get the built up residue off of your shower head

                                                                                                                              user a hair clip to orgainize long wires

                                                                                                                                a frozen saturated sponge in a bag

                                                                                                                                  rub stuck zipper teeth with a graphite pencil

                                                                                                                                    use a soda pop tab

                                                                                                                                      50

                                                                                                                                        51 How to multiply large numbers in your head.

                                                                                                                                          52 How to open a bottle if you dont have a corkscrew.

                                                                                                                                            rub a walnut on damaged wooden furniture

                                                                                                                                              kids fall out of bed

                                                                                                                                                use toothpaste to clear up hazy car

                                                                                                                                                  58

                                                                                                                                                    59 keep pizza out while driving home

                                                                                                                                                      60 put your straw through the tab to keep it from rising

                                                                                                                                                        hold oreos with a fork so your fingers

                                                                                                                                                          Never lose your remotes again

                                                                                                                                                            hiding your emergency money

                                                                                                                                                              use a bread tab to hold your spot on a roll

                                                                                                                                                                if you are at a hotel and run out of chargers

                                                                                                                                                                  keep a square of cardboard in a ziplock bag

                                                                                                                                                                    If you need to pee or smoke at a bar

                                                                                                                                                                      drill holes in the bottom of your garbage

                                                                                                                                                                        use an accented letter as your passcode

                                                                                                                                                                          use a squeeze ketchup bottle top with your shopvac

                                                                                                                                                                            do something unusual when locking the door

                                                                                                                                                                              when heating leftovers space out a circle in the middle

                                                                                                                                                                                dont burn yourself in those hard to reach candles

                                                                                                                                                                                  put a small amount of water in a glass when you microwave your pizza

                                                                                                                                                                                    75 use a piece of paper to organize

                                                                                                                                                                                      use half a pool noodle

                                                                                                                                                                                        pencil case to store cables

                                                                                                                                                                                          78 clothespin to hold nail

                                                                                                                                                                                            79 make blts

                                                                                                                                                                                              80 take a picture of your fridge

                                                                                                                                                                                                81 fill plastic water bottles

                                                                                                                                                                                                  82 right ways to eat chips

                                                                                                                                                                                                    99 if your plug keeps failing

                                                                                                                                                                                                      100 put the banana on the wire

                                                                                                                                                                                                        88 before you throw away a post it

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Source: Reddit LifeProTips

                                                                                                                                                                                                          There you go, 100 awesome life hacks that you can try right now to make your life a lot easier!

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