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9 Things To Remember Before You Date An Outgoing Introvert

9 Things To Remember Before You Date An Outgoing Introvert

An outgoing introvert is a rare and special creature. We don’t fall into the specific boundaries of extrovert or introvert – we are a unique mixture of the two. While it may take a little extra effort to understand an outgoing introvert, you will find your life changed for the better when you do. We are definitely puzzles worth solving.

Here are 9 things to remember before you date an outgoing introvert.

1. It takes us some time to find the right words

Our introverted side causes us to live in our heads quite a bit. Our extroverted side wants to talk and share feelings. When you combine the two, you get someone who has really important things to say but may need some time to get the words right. Be patient with us and you will be rewarded with true and meaningful conversation.

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2. We need a little time to ourselves every day

We enjoy your company and love being around others, but we give so much during these encounters that it drains us. We need some time every day to simply be quiet and recharge. This might mean sitting in the sun for ten minutes or taking a yoga class. Either way, give us that space and don’t take it personally. It has nothing to do with you.

3. We try to cancel plans at the last minute

The extrovert in us wants to socialize and be around others, but the introvert gets nervous and bored at the thought of small talk and awkward conversations. Gently remind us what a good time we will have, and know that we will most likely be the life of the party once we arrive.

4. We have a constant inner dialogue with ourselves

We tend to live in our heads, and are even known to talk to ourselves out loud. We are constantly analyzing the past and planning for the future. It’s not that we aren’t enjoying ourselves or having fun. It is just hard to turn off our inner voice. We want someone who can help us get out of our head and really enjoy the present moment.

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5. You can skip the small talk

We want deep and real conversation. We don’t have the patience for small talk or awkward silences. We don’t need your life story in the first date, but get ready to be honest and straightforward and ask interesting questions. If you mention reality tv, the weather, gossip or shopping, don’t expect that call for a second date.

6. Don’t post about our relationship on social media

We are extroverts, so we enjoy the socializing that Facebook and Twitter offer. But remember, we are also introverts, which means we choose to share our lives with just a few very close people. We would much rather receive a heart felt phone call or email from you than see a picture of our first date on Instagram.

7. We want to meet your friends, but not all at once

We want to meet the important people in your life, but only one or two at a time. We become self-conscious in a big group of people we don’t know. We want you to show us off, so please allow us to shine our brightest by saving the introductions for small dinner parties instead of company BBQs.

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8. Be ready to take the reigns

Because we appear outgoing and confident on the outside, people often let us make most decisions on our own. This can be exhausting for us. We occasionally just want to be told where we are going to dinner and what time to be ready, without having to plan everything ourselves.

9. We are different from anyone else you have dated

We are confident, beautiful, fun, creative, independent and grounded. We are also self-conscious, questioning, reserved, introspective and searching. We will make you feel like the most important person in the world, and will support your strengths and dreams. We will also need some extra encouragement during our quiet days.

If you are willing to walk the line between the two, you could find the perfect partner for life.

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Featured photo credit: Thomas Leuthard via flickr.com

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Last Updated on June 26, 2020

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

10 Things To Remember When Everything Goes Wrong

Problems and heartaches in life are inevitable. However, there are some things to remember when you’re right in the thick of it that can help you get through it. When everything seems to be going wrong, practice telling yourself these things.

1. This Too Shall Pass

Sometimes life’s rough patches feel like they’re going to last forever. Whether you’re dealing with work-related issues, family problems, or stressful situations, very few problems last for a lifetime. So remind yourself, that things won’t be this bad forever.

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2. Some Things are Going Right

When things are going wrong, it’s hard to recognize what is going right. It’s easy to screen out the good things and only focus on the bad things. Remind yourself that some things are going right. Purposely look for the positive, even if it is something very small.

3. I Have Some Control

One of the most most important things to remember is that you have some control of the situation. Even if you aren’t in complete control of the situation, one thing you can always control is your attitude and reaction. Focus on managing what is within your control.

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4. I Can Ask for Help

Asking for help can be hard sometimes. However, it’s one of the best ways to deal with tough situations. Tell people what you need specifically if they offer to help. Don’t be afraid to call on friends and family and ask them for help, whether you need financial assistance, emotional support, or practical help.

5. Much of This Won’t Matter in a Few Years

Most of the problems we worry about today won’t actually matter five years from now. Remind yourself that whatever is going wrong now is only a small percentage of your actual life. Even if you’re dealing with a major problem, like a loved one’s illness, remember that a lot of good things are likely to happen in the course of a year or two as well.

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6. I Can Handle This

A lack of confidence in handling tough times can add to stress. One of the best things to remember is that you can handle tough situations. Even though you might feel angry, hurt, disappointed, or sad, it won’t kill you. You can get through it.

7. Something Good Will Come Out of This

No matter how bad a situation is, it’s almost certain that something good will come out of it. At the very least, it’s likely that you will learn a life lesson. Perhaps you learn not to repeat the same mistake in the future or maybe you move on from a bad situation and find something better. Look for the one good thing that can result when bad things happen.

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8. I Can Accept What’s Out of my Control

There are many things that aren’t within your control. You can’t change the past, another person’s behavior, or a loved one’s health issues. Don’t waste time trying to force others to change or trying to make things be different if it isn’t within your control. Investing time and energy into trying to things you can’t will cause you to feel helpless and exhausted. Acceptance is one of the best way to establish resilience.

9. I Have Overcome Past Difficulties

One of the things to remember when you’re facing difficulties, is that you’ve handled problems in the past. Don’t overlook past difficulties that you’ve dealt with successfully. Remind yourself of all the past problems you’ve overcome and you’ll gain confidence in dealing with the current issues.

10. I Need to Take Care of Myself

When everything seems to be going wrong, take care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, get some exercise, eat healthy, and spend some time doing leisure activities. When you’re taking better care of yourself you’ll be better equipped to deal with your problems.

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Featured photo credit: NeONBRAND via unsplash.com

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