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10 Things You Can Learn From World’s Highly Successful Individuals

10 Things You Can Learn From World’s Highly Successful Individuals

We all dream of becoming a successful person one day. This specific thought of “becoming a successful individual” has been instilled in our minds ever since we were children. And as we grow up, it seems that our main focus, or target narrows down to this particular concept. We try hard to achieve our goal. We really try hard. But is it really that hard to become a successful person?

Why is it that we see a certain group of people as highly prosperous, while others are considered unfortunate? In order to flourish, you live, make mistakes, and you observe others. The good thing about observing others is, if you are surrounded by that group of successful people, you are likely to have the opportunity to pick their brains. Well, here are 10 skills to aid anyone in becoming a successful person. If you can follow these rules, one day your name will be up there in the ‘hall of successful individuals’.

1. They teach you empathy.

First thing you require is empathy. “To be a great leader is to be a great listener instead of a talker”, says Gary Vaynerchuk, a CEO. In an article The Most Valuable Skill Every Recruiter Overlooks, he writes about the number one skill every employee needs to have. He says, it is not about being organized– the secret lies in being empathy. Empathy provides room for friendship, understanding, rapport, and host of other things that help to build real and lasting relationships within a company.

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2. They want you to “steal” from the greats.

Pablo Picasso once said, “Great artists copy. Great artists steal.” One of the users of Quora, a question-answer based online forum, believes so too. In a recent thread on Quora, Martin Armstrong said that it actually helps to get attached to a great person, whom you look to as a role model. He states, “If you want to be successful, you must learn to steal!” It is not like stealing every idea or every concept from your “model”, but to follow them, to figure out what your model does to make them successful. Follow their footstep, and it will lead you to a path where you have a better future.

3. They teach you to be self-disciplined.

In order to be successful, you must learn the art of self-discipline. Why? Because “without self-discipline, success is impossible”, according to Lou Holtz.

As Brian Tracy, top sales training and personal success authority, and author of more than 60 books, explained in his article, Successful People Are Self Disciplined self discipline is vital in order to prosper in life. Disciplining oneself is a hard task. But it is achievable. And through personal discipline and perseverance, you can obtain any skills.

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4. They wish to be a charismatic person.

Being charismatic can add a great advantage to your life. You don’t have to look like Barbie or Ken, you don’t have to be Richie Rich, and you don’t have to be Dexter– if you have the ability to make people love you naturally, then you have a good chance of becoming successful. Another Quora user, Michael Graham, has written that charismatic people are easily recognized even if they are broke, unintelligent, foolish, and unattractive. According to him, a charismatic person can successfully make other people feel better about themselves, and they have an extraordinary ability to inspire trust around them, amongst other skills.

5. They make you understand that schools don’t guarantee success.

Getting first hand experience rather than depending on what others teach you is often a smart move. In simple words, it’s a faster approach, and a highly effective way to learn things for yourself. Gaining higher education is good. But it can sometimes be overrated too. Erika Andersen wrote an article titled Do You Really Need To Go To College? She wrote about whether a college certificate is essential for success. All in all, success totally depends on you, and you only.

6. They encourage single-tasking.

We all know how much we look up to a person who multi-tasks. Whether that person is your official boss, or your own family member, or your best friend– regardless, we all go, “Oh look! That person is so successful in life because that person does so many things at the same time. What genius!”

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Wrong. In fact, people who multi-task are not being more productive at all. Dr. Jim Taylor of University of San Francisco wrote an article called Multitasking is Out, Single Tasking is In. He elaborated on the fact that single-tasking requires more focus and attention, which eventually makes a person more committed, focused, and disciplined. And these factors play a key role in making one successful.

7. They teach you how to turn hurdles into opportunities.

We face different kinds of obstacles in different stages of life. Many take this as a negative sign. But if you stay negative throughout your journey, you will never reach your destination. Be positive. Survive the storm, turn your hurdles into opportunities. Atul Pradhananga, for example, believes that success lies in how we perceive the obstacles, how we react to them, and how we keep our composure during those times.

8. They make you an expert in saying “no”.

If there is a problem, or something you are disliking, be honest, and say “no”. “No” is a negative term, but if you can master the art of politely saying “no, thanks”, it will be better for both you and your people. Remember, individuals are not emotionally attached to you, so they would prefer honesty over dishonesty. A review by Harvard Business found that part of success lies in saying “no”. It is believed that people who always say “yes” to everything are either afraid to say “no”, or not sure of what they want. And these kind of people usually don’t success in life.

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9. They want a sense of humor.

Success needs three bones: wishbone, backbone, and funnybone” – Unknown.

Forbes magazine published an article on 10 Reasons Why Humor Is A Key To Success At Work. There, they mentioned how tasteful humor is important in a workplace. The majority of people tend to take everything, including themselves, seriously. This article focuses on the differences between a very serious workplace, and an office where humor plays a role of some sort. Humor can make people feel encouraged and comfortable, which is a marvelous art. People who can make a person laugh without hurting that person can tackle any situation, and thus can become successful in life.

10. They teach you patience and confidence.

Besides acquiring a sense of humor, another very significant skill to become successful is having patience, and confidence. Success doesn’t come overnight. It requires plenty of time. You can not simply stop in the middle of the route and give up. You need patience. You also need self motivation to keep you going. And you need confidence. Research shows that a confident person is willing to learn new things and experiment. Therefore, in order to be successful, one must learn to project confidence.

There are no shortcuts to success. Becoming a millionaire by buying lottery tickets can happen once in a million times. So there’s no point in wasting time in buying lottery tickets, and praying for a jackpot. Go out there, move with the pace every successful person is moving with, make mistakes, learn from them, teach yourself skills, and conquer the world. No, don’t do that. Just conquer your world, be successful, and be content.

Featured photo credit: Quinn Dombrowski via flickr.com

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

Habits are hard to kill, and rightly so. They are a part and parcel of your personality traits and mold your character.

However, habits are not always something over-the-top and quirky enough to get noticed. Think of subtle habits like tapping fingers when you are nervous and humming songs while you drive. These are nothing but ingrained habits that you may not realize easily.

Just take a few minutes and think of something specific that you do all the time. You will notice how it has become a habit for you without any explicit realization. Everything you do on a daily basis starting with your morning routine, lunch preferences to exercise routines are all habits.

Habits mostly form from life experiences and certain observed behaviors, not all of them are healthy. Habitual smoking can be dangerous to your health. Similarly, a habit could also make you lose out on enjoying something to its best – like how some people just cannot stop swaying their bodies when delivering a speech.

Thus, there could be a few habits that you would want to change about yourself. But changing habits is not as easy as it seems.

In this article, you will learn why it isn’t easy to build new habits, and how to change habits.

What Makes It Hard To Change A Habit?

To want to change a particular habit means to change something very fundamental about your behavior.[1] Hence, it’s necessary to understand how habits actually form and why they are so difficult to actually get out of.

The Biology

Habits form in a place what we call the subconscious mind in our brain.[2]

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Our brains have two modes of operation. The first one is an automatic pilot kind of system that is fast and works on reflexes often. It is what we call the subconscious part. This is the part that is associated with everything that comes naturally to you.

The second mode is the conscious mode where every action and decision is well thought out and follows a controlled way of thinking.

A fine example to distinguish both would be to consider yourself learning to drive or play an instrument. For the first time you try learning, you think before every movement you make. But once you have got the hang of it, you might drive without applying much thought into it.

Both systems work together in our brains at all times. When a habit is formed, it moves from the conscious part to the subconscious making it difficult to control.

So, the key idea in deconstructing a habit is to go from the subconscious to the conscious.

Another thing you have to understand about habits is that they can be conscious or hidden.

Conscious habits are those that require active input from your side. For instance, if you stop setting your alarm in the morning, you will stop waking up at the same time.

Hidden habits, on the other hand, are habits that we do without realizing. These make up the majority of our habits and we wouldn’t even know them until someone pointed them out. So the first difficulty in breaking these habits is to actually identify them. As they are internalized, they need a lot of attention to detail for self-identification. That’s not all.

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Habits can be physical, social, and mental, energy-based and even be particular to productivity. Understanding them is necessary to know why they are difficult to break and what can be done about them.

The Psychology

Habits get engraved into our memories depending on the way we think, feel and act over a particular period of time. The procedural part of memory deals with habit formation and studies have observed that various types of conditioning of behavior could affect your habit formations.

Classical conditioning or pavlovian conditioning is when you start associating a memory with reality.[3] A dog that associates ringing bell to food will start salivating. The same external stimuli such as the sound of church bells can make a person want to pray.

Operant conditioning is when experience and the feelings associated with it form a habit.[4] By encouraging or discouraging an act, individuals could either make it a habit or stop doing it.

Observational learning is another way habits could take form. A child may start walking the same way their parent does.

What Can You Do To Change a Habit?

Sure, habits are hard to control but it is not impossible. With a few tips and hard-driven dedication, you can surely get over your nasty habits.

Here are some ways that make use of psychological findings to help you:

1. Identify Your Habits

As mentioned earlier, habits can be quite subtle and hidden from your view. You have to bring your subconscious habits to an aware state of mind. You could do it by self-observation or by asking your friends or family to point out the habit for your sake.

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2. Find out the Impact of Your Habit

Every habit produces an effect – either physical or mental. Find out what exactly it is doing to you. Does it help you relieve stress or does it give you some pain relief?

It could be anything simple. Sometimes biting your nails could be calming your nerves. Understanding the effect of a habit is necessary to control it.

3. Apply Logic

You don’t need to be force-fed with wisdom and advice to know what an unhealthy habit could do to you.

Late-night binge-watching just before an important presentation is not going to help you. Take a moment and apply your own wisdom and logic to control your seemingly nastily habits.

4. Choose an Alternative

As I said, every habit induces some feeling. So, it could be quite difficult to get over it unless you find something else that can replace it. It can be a simple non-harming new habit that you can cultivate to get over a bad habit.

Say you have the habit of banging your head hard when you are angry. That’s going to be bad for you. Instead, the next time you are angry, just take a deep breath and count to 10. Or maybe start imagining yourself on a luxury yacht. Just think of something that will work for you.

5. Remove Triggers

Get rid of items and situations that can trigger your bad habit.

Stay away from smoke breaks if you are trying to quit it. Remove all those candy bars from the fridge if you want to control your sweet cravings.

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6. Visualize Change

Our brains can be trained to forget a habit if we start visualizing the change. Serious visualization is retained and helps as a motivator in breaking the habit loop.

For instance, to replace your habit of waking up late, visualize yourself waking up early and enjoying the early morning jog every day. By continuing this, you would naturally feel better to wake up early and do your new hobby.

7. Avoid Negative Talks and Thinking

Just as how our brain is trained to accept a change in habit, continuous negative talk and thinking could hamper your efforts put into breaking a habit.

Believe you can get out of it and assert yourself the same.

Final Thoughts

Changing habits isn’t easy, so do not expect an overnight change!

Habits took a long time to form. It could take a while to completely break out of it. You will have to accept that sometimes you may falter in your efforts. Don’t let negativity seep in when it seems hard. Keep going at it slowly and steadily.

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Featured photo credit: Mel via unsplash.com

Reference

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