Advertising
Advertising

10 Sympathy Cards That Don’t Suck

10 Sympathy Cards That Don’t Suck

Let’s face it.

Sympathy cards suck.

They’re sure no fun to give. They’re torturous to buy. And they’re even worse to receive.

If you suffer from a serious illness (or have in the past), you know that the whole scenario can go badly.

When faced with someone else’s illness, normally intelligent and capable humans turn into awkward, foot-in-mouth, ridiculous-card-giving morons.

Not fun.

Advertising

Thankfully, one incredibly talented and empathetic artist has done something about it.

Emily McDowell’s cards have been getting a lot of attention these days. That’s because she knows what needs to be said and how to say it. And she has put her words together with her art on these incredibly beautiful, sometimes humorous and always caring post cards.

Card1

    The friend who gives this knows that scouring the Internet will not relieve the pain, stress or fear that illness brings with it. Just plain care and understanding cure more than Google ever will.

    Card2

      Beautiful and honest. Even though good can often be found on the other side of crisis, it doesn’t take away the pain of the struggle. So why talk about it?

      Advertising

      Card3

        While trite words aren’t helpful, cruises could be exactly what the doctor ordered!

        Card4

          Most people truly want to say something comforting and supportive. Thankfully, the artist wrote it out very artfully on this card.

          Card5

            Beautiful. This card doesn’t even have to be kept for a time of crisis. Who wouldn’t like to hear these words?

            Advertising

            Card6

              Illness is lonely. This card could help a well meaning friend who has dropped the ball reconnect gracefully.

              Card7

                This card is proof that there are reasons to celebrate everywhere. A chemo session ending is a perfect excuse to rejoice.

                Card8

                  Just a simple message that says your friend is there to do whatever you need them to do. Beautiful!

                  Advertising

                  Card9

                    Emily says, as a cancer patient, she never connected with jokes about being bald or getting a free boob job. Sometimes, there is nothing helpful to be said.

                    Card10

                      Last but not least, calling out what doesn’t help can sometimes be the best thing a friend can do.

                      Emily McDowell has given a great alternative to substandard sympathy greetings for ill or struggling friends.

                      Who do you know who needs visually pleasing words that actually help?

                      Featured photo credit: The Silent Hospital by Ryan McGuire via imcreator.com

                      More by this author

                      Proof you have more positive relationship power than you think 3 Relationship “Truths” That Are Actually Dangerous Lies 4 Vital Ways Your Friends Make You a Better Spouse 10 Sympathy Cards That Don’t Suck

                      Trending in Communication

                      1 5 Things to Do If You Don’t Want to Get Back to Work 2 Take Back Control of your Life with Positive Emotions 3 Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again 4 I Don’t Know What to Do With My Life! 5 Steps to Get Unstuck 5 This Is How Mentally Strong People Deal With Guilt

                      Read Next

                      Advertising
                      Advertising
                      Advertising

                      Last Updated on October 14, 2020

                      Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

                      Had a Bad Day? 7 Ways to Rebound From It and Feel Good Again

                      Today didn’t turn out as you planned, but it doesn’t mean you’re weak. It simply means that you’re human, and you’re not bad just because you had a bad day.

                      “Not everyday is a good day but there is something good in every day.” -Alice Morse Earle

                      It’s not the end of the world when you find yourself thinking “I had a bad day,” but it can feel like it. You may have had plans that fell apart, experiences that set you back, and interactions that only did harm.

                      You may have started the day thinking you could take on it all, only to find you could hardly get out of bed. When you have a bad day, you can forget to look at the good.

                      Sometimes, self-care helps us to remember why we are worth it. It helps us to recharge and reset our mindset. It helps us to know that there are still options and that the day isn’t over yet.

                      Love yourself today, no matter how hard it’s been. That’s the way to find yourself amidst the hardships you have. That’s how you center yourself and regain focus and live a more meaningful life. Give yourself some credit and compassion.

                      Here are 7 ways to rebound from a bad day using self-compassion as a tool. If you had a bad day, these are for you!

                      1. Make a Gratitude List

                      In a study on gratitude, psychologists Dr. Robert A Emmons and Dr. Michael E. McCullough conducted an experiment where one group of people wrote out gratitude lists for ten weeks while another group wrote about irritations. The study found that the group that wrote about gratitude reported more optimistic mindsets in their lives[1].

                      Overall, having a gratitude list improved well-being and made one truly grateful by counting the blessings in their lives.

                      Write a list of what you are grateful for if you had a bad day. Make it as long as you like, but also remember to note why you’re grateful for each thing you write.

                      What has given you the most joy? What has set you up for better days? Keep a tally of triumphs in mind, especially when you do have the bad days.

                      Advertising

                      The day doesn’t define you, and you still have things of value that surround you. These could be material things, spiritual connections and experiences, relationships, basic needs, emotional and mental well-being, physical health, progress towards hopes and dreams, or simply being alive.

                      Here are some other simple ways to practice gratitude.

                      2. Write in a Journal

                      Journaling affects your overall mental health, which also affects physical health and aids in the management of stress, depression, anxiety, and more[2].

                      All you need is a pen and paper, or you could do an online, password-protected journal such as Penzu. The key is to get started and not pressure yourself on how polished or perfect it is. You don’t need to have prior experience to start journal writing. Just start.

                      Write out everything that is bothering you for 15 minutes. This helps with rumination, processing problems, and can even aid with brainstorming solutions.

                      However you approach it, you can find patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and start to transform your overall mental state. This will impact all areas of your life and is a great coping skill.

                      3. Meditate

                      Meditation can help you overcome negative thought patterns, worrying about the future, dwelling on the past, or struggling to overcome a bad day[3]. It shifts your mentality and helps you focus on the present or any one thing you truly want to focus on.

                      Here is an example of a meditation you can do:

                      Get into a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Rest your body, release tension, and unclench your jaw. Tighten and release each muscle group in a body scan for progressive muscle relaxation.

                      Focus on your breath, taking a few deep breaths. Let your belly expand when you breathe in for diaphragmatic breathing. Empty yourself completely of air, then return to normal breathing.

                      Next, focus on the idea of self-love and let it erase negative thoughts. Think about the ways you’ve been judging yourself, with the narratives coming up that your mind may create.

                      Advertising

                      Give yourself unconditional love and release judgment. Take your time meditating on this because you matter. This is particularly important if you had a bad day.

                      Check out this article for more on how to get started with a meditation practice.

                      4. Do Child’s Pose

                      Yoga Outlet says:

                      “Child’s Pose is a simple way to calm your mind, slow your breath, and restore a feeling of peace and safety. Practicing the pose before bedtime can help to release the worries of the day. Practicing in the morning can you help transition from sleeping to waking.”[4]

                      When you do Child’s Pose, it can be between difficult positions in yoga, or it can be anytime you feel you need a rest. It helps you recover from difficulties and relax the mind.

                      It also has the physical health benefits of elongating your back, opening your hips, and helping with digestion[5].

                      To do Child’s Pose, rest your buttocks back on your feet, knees on the floor. Elongate your body over your knees with both arms extended or tucked back, with head and neck resting on the floor[6].

                      Had a bad day? Try Child's Pose.

                         

                        Do this pose as a gift to yourself. You are allowing yourself to heal, rest, get time for yourself, recover, and recharge. When you’ve had a bad day, it’s there waiting for you.

                        5. Try Positive Self-Talk

                        Engage in positive self-talk. This is essentially choosing your thoughts.

                        Advertising

                        When you have a negative thought, such as “I can’t do this,” replace it consciously with the thought “I can do this.” Give yourself positive affirmations to help with this.

                        Negative self-talk fits into four general categories: personalizing or blaming yourself, magnifying or only focusing on the negative, catastrophizing or expecting the worst to happen, and polarizing or only seeing back and white[7].

                        When you stop blaming yourself for everything and start focusing on the positive, expecting things to work out, and seeing the areas of grey in life, you reverse these negative mindsets and engage in positive self-talk.

                        When you speak words of kindness to yourself, your brain responds with a more positive attitude. That attitude will affect everything you do. It’s how you take care of yourself if you had a bad day.

                        Check in with yourself to know when you are having negative self-talk. Are you seeing patterns? When did they start to become a problem? Are you able to turn these thoughts around?

                        6. Use Coping Skills and Take a Break

                        Use your coping skills. This means not letting your thoughts take control of yourself.

                        You can distract yourself and escape a bit. Do things you love. You can exercise, listen to music, dance, volunteer or help someone, be in nature, or read a book.

                        It isn’t about repression. It’s about redirection. You can’t stay in thoughts that are no longer working for you.

                        Sometimes, it’s okay to get out of your own way. Give yourself a break from the things going on in your head. You can always come back to a problem later. This may even help you figure out the best course of action as sometimes stepping away is the only way to see the solution.

                        If you had a bad day, you may not feel like addressing what went wrong. You may need a break, so take one.

                        7. If a Bad Day Turns Into Bad Days

                        “I believe depression is legitimate. But I also believe that if you don’t exercise, eat nutritious food, get sunlight, get enough sleep, consume positive material, surround yourself with support, then you aren’t giving yourself a fighting chance.” –Jim Carrey

                        If you’ve been feeling out of control, depressed, or unstable for more than a few weeks, it’s time to call a mental health professional. This is not because you have failed in any way. It’s because you are human, and you simply need help.

                        You may not be able to quickly rebound from a bad day, and that’s fine. Feel what you feel, but don’t let it consume you.

                        When you talk to a professional, share the techniques that you have already tried here and whether they were helpful. They may tell you additional ideas or gain insights from your struggles of not being able to rebound from a series of bad days.

                        If you’re having more than just a bad day, they will want to know. If you don’t have the answers, that’s okay, too. You just need to try these tools and figure out how you’re feeling. That’s all that’s required of you.

                        Keep taking care of yourself. Any progress is progress, no matter how small. Give yourself a chance to get better by reaching out.

                        Final Thoughts

                        If you had a bad day, don’t let it stop you.

                        Know this: It’s okay not to be okay. You have a right to feel what you feel. But there is something you can do about it.

                        You can invest in yourself via self-care.

                        You are not alone in this. Everyone has bad days from time to time. You just need to know that you are the positive things you tell yourself.

                        More Things You Can Do If You Had a Bad Day

                        Featured photo credit: Anthony Tran via unsplash.com

                        Reference

                        Read Next