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15 Signs You Have Become More Mature Though You Don’t Even Know It

15 Signs You Have Become More Mature Though You Don’t Even Know It

I’ve always resisted growing up. When I was younger I used to think that, with enough effort, you could preserve the mindset of a child; alas, this isn’t true. I mean, this is a common occurrence among young people—not wanting to grow up—but growing up is a natural thing and believe it or not, it is a good thing. The thing with growing up is that it really creeps up on you, and it happens without you even realizing. It has a lot to do with your ability to introspect and learn from experience, but the result of the process is not always obvious and straightforward.

The thing is, most people in their 20s and 30s don’t really get how far they have grown and how grown up they actually are. Let us open your eyes and show you how far you have actually gotten. The signs are subtle, but they are most definitely there.

1. You take time more seriously.

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    One of the clearest signs that you’re maturing is that you realize that how you manage time is one of the more important aspects of your life. Immature people don’t really think about time, and tend to waste quite a lot of it. They also tend to disregard other people’s time quite often and don’t realize why people get mad when they complain about their tardiness.

    2. You confront responsibilities head on.

    If you no longer have those moments where you keep procrastinating, all the while feeling guilty that you are not paying attention to all those responsibilities waiting for you, then congratulations, you are growing up. A mature person knows that he/she will feel much better if they handle the work first and then relax with a clear conscience.

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    3. You plan things out.

    Impulsivity and spontaneity are things reserved for younger people. I’m not saying that mature people can’t show these qualities, but they don’t usually make life moves based purely on a gut instinct. Making big decisions like that can cause serious trouble for you if they go wrong and the less planning there is in your decision-making process, the more likely something is to go sour. For example a mature person is aware of the potential threats when moving, while an immature one takes the whole thing lightly. Carelessness is something you need to resort to in specific situations, not all the time. This is why a mature person will always have at least a broad plan that includes the goals they wish to reach. It is the only way you progress.

    4. You think about your health more often.

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      Most people will think that this is just because as your body gets older, you automatically start paying more attention to health, but actually there are people out there that are quite old and still disregard their health. This has nothing to do with age; it has more to do with the realization that you are not invincible and that regular check-ups help you remain in good physical as well as mental health. This includes checking your home for health hazards which might not be outwardly apparent, like testing for potential mold that can cause respiratory problems, checking your installations for fire hazards and so on. There are quite a few threats that can skulk around the house without you being aware of them.

      5. You feel uncomfortable doing nothing.

      Wasting time used to be my specialty. Back in the day, I could waste an entire day doing absolutely nothing and even make the day seem short in all that nothingness. These days, things are quite a bit different. I tend to strive to fill every minute of my day with things that I consider either useful or enjoyable—in some cases, even both. Sitting around twiddling my thumbs really annoys me and makes me feel useless. Getting there is a process, but if you notice a slight annoyance when you spend an entire day doing nothing even though you have no obligations, then you are on the right way to maturity.

      6. You have less patience for parties and going out.

      Ah, yes, weekends come and go and you haven’t hit the club for months and you’re not even sorry. It used to be that you really felt bad by missing a chance to go paint the town red during the weekend with you friends, but these days, you are not really impressed by what this kind of lifestyle has to offer. You’d much rather enjoy a quiet evening with a nice dinner and a book or a movie before bed. Even when you decide to go out, the hangover that you get tomorrow really proves that it was not quite worth it. Furthermore, you lost an entire day recovering, which is a pretty steep price for one night of debauchery.

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      7. Your circle of friends is a bit smaller.

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        All relationships require energy and a part of growing up is realizing which relationships in your life truly hold great value and which ones do not require you to invest too much into them. Mature people know to show respect to the people in their life that truly matter and don’t waste too much time on causal relationships.

        8. You rely on yourself more.

        Whether it is parents, friends or a romantic partner, immature people always have a go-to person when they get “in trouble.” If you find that you are solving all your problems by yourself and taking responsibility for your own shortcomings, then you can most definitely call yourself a mature person.

        9. You cherish sleep.

        Having an active day on half batteries is quite stressful. Lack of sleep causes sloppiness due to lack of concentration and irritability, and it is terrible for the immune system. With maturity comes the realization that you have your limits and need a good night’s sleep in order to perform at you maximum in everything that you do. Still, it takes some time to find the best routine for yourself and if you have problems adjusting, you might want to research this subject a bit. It sometimes has nothing to do with maturity but with the way you get organized, but sometimes even some tech assistance isn’t too bad.

        10. You focus on self-improvement.

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          It has nothing to do with ambition but with the effort of making your own life better. The more things you know and can do, the better person you become and the easier your life gets. You enjoy progressing and opening up new opportunities and situations for yourself. Experience is key and boredom is the enemy, and a mature person realizes that the more you work on your skillset, the more options you have!

          11. You respect people who make an effort.

          Immature people tend to consider responsible and diligent individuals uptight or overly serious. As you mature, you begin to realize how much passion and energy this kind of devotion actually requires. Furthermore, you want to hear about everyone’s experiences in order to improve yourself. There are tons of things you can learn by simply being patient and listening.

          12. You respect yourself more.

          Mature people have a more stable personality which isn’t rattled by other people’s opinions. If the time when other people’s approval or disapproval could impact your opinion on your decisions is behind you, then you have grown quite a bit.

          13. You have learned to focus more easily.

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            There is a subtle difference between being a day dreamer and letting your mind wander from your tasks. The former is a part of a creative process while the latter is more of an escape from your obligations. If you tend to zone out when bored by your work or other obligations, then you still have some way to go until you reach maturity. If you have managed to find that “On switch” in your mind that let’s you focus instantly, then don’t worry: you are already there.

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            14. You respect your work time.

            Being lazy during the work hours does nothing for you except that it allows work to leak through into your leisure time. This is quite frustrating since you are constantly under the impression that you need to sit down to take care of your work and you can’t ever really relax. Maturity is knowing that you need to keep work and leisure time separate.

            15. You allow yourself to have fun guilt-free.

            Finally, the thing that you realize as a mature person is that the best kind of fun comes out of those times when you are really free to enjoy yourself. No nagging voice inside your head is telling you that you shouldn’t be doing something. You are free to relax and enjoy your free time and let yourself go.

            Maturity is having control over yourself and your life, taking action and being respectful to others no matter your difference of opinion, religion and other things that seem to outwardly divide people. It has nothing to do with age; it has to do with the mindset of a person and his/her desire to grow and become the best version of him/herself. It is a thing a lot of people don’t achieve their entire lives and is something you need to work on actively.

            Reaching maturity is not a moment, it is more of a process and it takes time to get there, but the benefits are pretty good. Don’t overdo it though!

            Featured photo credit: meditation by Elissa Eikelboom via Flickr via flickr.com

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            Aleksandar Ilic

            Blogger, Social Media Butterfly, Guitarist

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            Last Updated on April 6, 2020

            10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

            10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

            Most discussions on positively influencing others eventually touch on Dale Carnegie’s seminal work, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written more than 83 years ago, the book touches on a core component of human interaction, building strong relationships. It is no wonder why.

            Everything that we do hinges on our ability to connect with others and formulate deep relationships. You cannot sell a house, buy a house, advance in most careers, sell a product, pitch a story, teach a course, etc. without building healthy relationships. Managers get the best results from their teams, not through brute force, but to careful appeals to their sensibilities, occasional withdrawals from the reservoir of respect they’ve built. Using these tactics, they can influence others to excellence, to productivity, and to success.

            Carnegie’s book is great. Of course, there are other resources too. Most of us have someone in our lives who positively influences us. The truth is positively influencing people is about centering the humanity of others. Chances are, you know someone who is really good at making others feel like stars. They can get you to do things that the average person cannot. Where the requests of others sound like fingernails on a chalkboard, the request from this special person sounds like music to your ears. You’re delighted to not only listen but also to oblige.

            So how to influence people in a positive way? Read on for tips.

            1. Be Authentic

            To influence people in a positive way, be authentic. Rather than being a carbon copy of someone else’s version of authenticity, uncover what it is that makes you unique.

            Discover your unique take on an issue and then live up to and honor that. Once of the reasons social media influencers are so powerful is that they have carved out a niche for themselves or taken a common issue and approached it from a novel or uncommon way. People instinctually appreciate people whose public persona matches their private values.

            Contradictions bother us because we crave stability. When someone professes to be one way, but lives contrary to that profession, it signals that they are confused or untrustworthy and thereby, inauthentic. Neither of these combinations bode well for positively influencing others.

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            2. Listen

            Growing up, my father would tell me to listen to what others said. He told me if I listened carefully, I would know all I needed to know about a person’s character, desires and needs.

            To positively influence others, you must listen to what is spoken and what is left unsaid. Therein lies the explanation for what people need in order to feel validated, supported and seen. If a person feels they are invisible, and unseen by their superiors, they are less likely to be positively influenced by that person.

            Listening meets a person’s primary need of validation and acceptance.

            Take a look at this guide on how to be a better listener: How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

            3. Become an Expert

            Most people are predisposed to listen to, if not respect, authority. If you want to positively influence others, become an authority in the area in which you seek to lead others. Research and read everything you can about the given topic, and then look for opportunities to put your education into practice.

            You can argue over opinions. You cannot argue, or it is unwise to argue, over facts and experts come with facts.

            4. Lead with Story

            From years of working in the public relations space, I know that personal narratives, testimonials and impact stories are incredibly powerful. But I never cease to be amazed with how effective a well-timed and told story can be.

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            If you want to influence people, learn to tell stories. Your stories should be related to the issue or concept you are discussing. They should be an analogy or metaphor that explains your topic in ordinary terms and in vivid detail. To learn more about how to tell powerful stories, and the ethics of storytelling, take a look at this article: How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

            5. Lead by Example

            It is incredibly inspiring to watch passionate, talented people at work or play. One of the reasons a person who is not an athlete can be in awe of athletic prowess is because human nature appreciates the extraordinary. When we watch the Olympics, Olympic trials, gymnastic competitions, ice skating, and other competitive sports, we can recognize the effort of people who day in and day out give their all. C

            ase in point: Simone Biles. The gymnast extraordinaire won her 6TH all-around title at the U.S. Gymnastics Championships after doing a triple double. She was the first woman to do so. Watching her gave me chills. Even non-gymnasts and non-competitive athletes can appreciate the talent required to pull off such a remarkable feat.

            We celebrate remarkable accomplishments and believe that their example is proof that we too can accomplish something great, even if it isn’t qualifying for the Olympics. To influence people in a positive way, we must lead by example, lead with intention and execute with excellence.

            6. Catch People Doing Good

            A powerful way to influence people in a positive way is to catch people doing good. Instead of looking for problems, look for successes. Look for often overlooked, but critically important things that your peers, subordinates and managers do that make the work more effective and more enjoyable.

            Once you catch people doing good, name and notice their contributions.

            7. Be Effusive with Praise

            It did not take me long to notice a remarkable trait of a former boss. He not only began and ended meetings with praise, but he peppered praise throughout the entire meeting. He found a way to celebrate the unique attributes and skills of his team members. He was able to quickly and accurately assess what people were doing well and then let them and their colleagues know.

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            Meetings were not just an occasion to go through a “To Do” list, they were opportunities to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small they are.

            8. Be Kind Rather Than Right

            I am going to level with you; this one is tough. It is easy to get caught up in a cycle of proving oneself. For people who lack confidence, or people who prioritize the opinions of others, being right is important. The validation that comes with being perceived as “right” feeds one’s ego. But in the quest to be “right,” we can hurt other people. Once we’ve hurt someone by being unkind, it is much harder to get them to listen to what we’re trying to influence them to do.

            The antidote to influencing others via bullying is to prioritize kindness above rightness. You can be kind and still stand firm in your position. For instance, many people think that they need others to validate their experience. If a person does not see the situation you experienced in the way you see it, you get upset. But your experience is your experience.

            If you and your friends go out to eat and you get food poisoning, you do not need your friends to agree that the food served at the restaurant was problematic for you. Your own experience of getting food poisoning is all the validation you need. Therefore, taking time to be right is essentially wasted and, if you were unkind in seeking validation for your food-poison experience, now you’ve really lost points.

            9. Understand a Person’s Logical, Emotional and Cooperative Needs

            The Center for Creative Leadership has argued that the best way to influence others is to appeal to their logical, emotional and cooperative needs. Their logical need is their rational and educational need. Their emotional need is the information that touches them in a deeply personal manner. The cooperative need is understanding the level of cooperation various individuals need and then appropriately offering it.

            The trick with this system is to understand that different people need different things. For some people, a strong emotional appeal will outweigh logical explanations. For others, having an opportunity to collaborate will override emotional connection.

            If you know your audience, you will know what they need in order to be positively influenced. If you have limited information about the people whom you are attempting to influence, you will be ineffective.

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            10. Understand Your Lane

            If you want to positively influence others, operate from your sphere of influence. Operate from your place of expertise. Leave everything else to others. Gone are the days when being a jack of all trades is celebrated.

            Most people appreciate brands that understand their target audience and then deliver on what that audience wants. When you focus on what you are uniquely gifted and qualified to do, and then offer that gift to the people who need it, you are likely more effective. This effectiveness is attractive.

            You cannot positively influence others if you are more preoccupied by what others do well versus what you do well.

            Final Thoughts

            Influencing people is about centering your humanity. If you want to influence others positively, focus on the way you communicate and improve the relationship with yourself first.

            It’s hard to influence others if you’re still trying to figure out how to communicate with yourself.

            More Tips About Making Influence

            Featured photo credit: Wonderlane via unsplash.com

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