Hurt people hurt people.
I recently read this and it really struck a cord with me. When I read that statement and let the meaning really sink in, I felt myself being lifted to a higher level of understanding. I felt my heart open up and compassion flow through me because I realized, aren’t we all in our essence scared little children who are trying to protect ourselves? Haven’t we all been hurt in some way or another?
If someone hurts you, instead of reacting right away, pause and consider, WHY are they hurting you. Any anger, criticism, or judgment comes from a deeper, underlying fear. We have a choice on how to react to any situation. We ARE in control…if we choose to be. That means becoming more aware and pausing before going for that immediate reaction.
Eckert Tolle talks about the “pain body” that we all have. Some have a much larger pain body than others. This is the collection of all hurts, sorrows, anger, and fears in an energetic field around your body. It’s your baggage that you haven’t dealt with and continue to carry around. The pain body requires more pain to expand and therefore we end up experiencing automatic reactions to situations that become even more painful.
Compassion helps to melt away those pains. Quite honestly, if you take the time to really look at the pain you’ve experienced, is it serving you now? Yes, it may have been fine for a while to protect you from dangerous situations. An abused child needs to be protected and will naturally create ways of dealing with the pain. But as an adult, when the threat or danger is no longer there, the programming of the pain often still is! We are living our lives on programming that is no longer necessary—but we don’t know how to change that.
Just like computers need updating and new, improved software to function well, we do too! If you are running on old programs in your subconscious, then perhaps it’s time to upgrade. How do you know if you have old programs? Just look at the results you have in your life. Are you where you want to be? Are you living your dream life? If not, only YOU can change that.
We are in the process of discovering wonderful methods to heal ourselves. We have ways to free our hearts. It may be hard to think in terms of love if you’ve been hurt so badly. But forgiveness is something you can do to open the door to love, to compassion, and to free you own heart! Our world is so full of violence, anger, injustice, and hate. We each have a responsibility in our own lives to raise ourselves above that darkness, to choose to see love over the fear.
In the past year, I’ve been learning so much about natural healing modalities that can bypass those old programs in your system. Bruce Lipton, a renowned cell biologist, gives a great list on his website of all sorts of ways you can bypass the old and reprogram yourself naturally. Our brains are truly amazing and have huge capabilities to change and improve. The desire needs to start from within. This is why I think more and more people are finding themselves on a journey, dealing with huge crisis in their lives, and finding ways to overcome challenges. Become proactive about your life, the way you choose to live it, and that starts with being aware of how you are choosing to react to situations.
The next time someone hurts you, pause before you respond and think about what the underlying message may be. You may find that the real reason is that person is hurting as well. It may open up the communication if you can recognize that person’s pain and help them see where they are hurting. I am willing to bet it will improve the relationship. And those things that we can do on a small level in our own lives, are things that will work on a bigger level too.
Here is an experiment I challenge you to take on: make a conscious choice to be more compassionate, both with yourself and with others, and see what happens. One week, try it…you have nothing to lose. You can make a difference in the world—just start with yourself first!
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