Recently I had the opportunity to sit down with Jacqueline Novogratz, founder and CEO of The Acumen Fund. She is one of the most innovative and interesting philanthropists in the world today. Her non profit has taken on the world’s poverty problem by directly investing capital in developing world businesses that have the potential to deliver critical goods and services like health, water, housing and energy.
Jacqueline Novogratz
More than anything, Jacqueline is a very likable person. She’s funny and light and her self deprecation is genuine. We had a great conversation and I gathered some great quality of life practices for my book and site.
One of the most interesting areas she went into was the enrichment and quality of life factor of being open to others.
Here is a 90 second excerpt in which Jacqueline discusses this perspective:
novogratz-open-to-others (MP3 download)
I think the first takeaway is simply that arrogance is anti-life. When we are shut off from people because we think we are better in some way, or we just don’t think they are worth our time, we miss out on all that life has to offer. When you realize that you are no better than anyone else (and of course the flip side that no one is better than you), a world of enriching experiences and opportunities opens up.
As Jacqueline put it, “Every person out there has a story.” And when you are open to others, life becomes richer. [Look, it goes without saying that there are nuances and exceptions with anything. And in this case one can still have boundaries in life while being “open to others.”]
I also like how Jacqueline mentions it’s not just about opening up to the man in the mud hut but also the king. Oftentimes, we become overly judgmental of those “above us”, whether leadership wise or socio economic wise. And she points out the folly in this mindset. That there is also a trove of learning experiences from these types if we open up.
It seems it’s not just about being open but also pro actively seeking to learn from the many people around us that have wisdom and experience to impart. I was getting my haircut a few weeks ago and was talking with my barber Bill. We were talking about having kids and he talked about his challenges in raising a teenage daughter. I remember my instinct, which was to relate it to me and say something in response. And then I had this thought… “Why don’t I just ask him open-endedly what he has learned on the parenting front.” When I did, he gave me a great wisdom bit that I was able to chew on. He said, “Now is the time to nip negative behaviors in the bud. If you have a four year old that has a complaining habit, do not think you can teach him out of it later. Now is the time to deal with it.”
Three weeks later over another haircut, Bill was telling me how he is divorced and now back in the dating scene. I asked him, “What is something you learned along the way with marriage?” Bill took a few seconds, then said, “A husband might think there is a better someone out there when the going gets tough. But if you have someone you love, and they love you, stick with it. Because I can tell you, I’ve been single for ten years and I haven’t found anyone close to measuring up to my ex-wife.”
Man, those were two pretty good life bites, no?
I guess the point is how much upside there is to taking advantage of learning opportunities out there, as well as the general enjoyment of hearing other people’s stories. And that a precursor for all of this is an understanding that while you might be good at something, or accomplished in some way, or have amassed some material gain — that does not make you better than anyone else, or is anyone else better than you.
It also seems clear from this interview the relation between openness to others and an ability to connect with people in general. When you have the qualities that Jacqueline is talking about, people notice the way you carry yourself, that look in your eyes. The two qualities go hand in hand it seems.
I guess the main point is that getting away from arrogance is an important step in getting the most that life has to offer.
What are your thoughts on this subject? Are there other ways we should look at this?
Wow,
amazing advice. Some of the best I’ve ever read and I had thought I’d read it all. I especially like the idea that it’s omnidirectional. Sometimes we may be able to open ourselves to the wisdom of a certain swath of people, but to be open to the wisdom of all people is a big paradigm shift for me.
Excellent article! The quality of our life is determined by the quality of our relationships. And it all comes back to how we are being in our day to day dealing with other people.
One suggestion I always make is to get to know the names of the people who make your daily life so easy e.g. your postman, dustmen, shop assistants etc.
Try this today and watch how richer these relationships become.
That is one profound article. I really loved the part about asking someone what they’ve learned. The next time I’m around someone I don’t know very well or someone really different from myself, I plan to ask them what they’ve learned about whatever topic we’re discussing. Truly fantastic advice.
It’s so interesting to me to hear each person’s relation to this post.
Donovan: Totally agree. I hope it came across appropriate what a work-in-process this is. Plus I’d rather not be perfect but just enjoy the benefits of learning more and enjoying the journey.
Arvind: I like your micro suggestion a lot. Actually my 4 yr old son just recently started asking to know the names of waiters etc. So it’s not just cliche how we learn from our kids!
Catherine: Thanks for the feedback. I noticed I didn’t get as many comments on this article as others. So if you like the format and structure, please help spread the word.
All best, good night from California….
Great post. I recently have gone through my wife’s departure from me and I had similar thoughts to find a better fit. But I do realize my problem is not opening my heart. This post reaffirm my confidence in remaining the courage to love and to be loved. Thank you.
Thanks for sharing the views about this important topic. Openness opens the various door of getting knowledge through different channels.