Just Listen To Yourself
How often do you have a really strong gut instinct and it proves to be wrong? How often do you override that instinct and then kick yourself later on? My guess would be that if you’re anything like the people that come to me for life coaching the answers are hardly ever and always.
Everybody knows intuitively that they have solid instincts. I have never met anybody either professionally or socially that says. “My gut feeling is terrible, I’m always getting in a mess by listening to myself, what can I do about it?” How weird is that? It seems to me it’s a universal truth.
Although at this point I have to confess I only know a small percentage of people when we look at it from a global perspective. In fact, we are probably talking about 0.000005% of the population; so statistically speaking it’s about as accurate as a blind baseball pitcher with Meniere’s disease.
Having said that, I’m prepared to bet that you don’t disagree with me. In fact, I’ll go as far to say that if you can honestly say you believe your gut instinct lets you down on a regular basis, drop me an e-mail and I’ll mail you a copy of my book with instructions on how to operate it, because you’re going to need them.
The conscious human mind can only deal with 7 + or – 2 pieces of information at once. Until you read this sentence you almost certainly aren’t aware of your left foot. But hey, presto, now you are! Way to go on shifting your awareness like a Zen Master. If you lost your foot in a freak fairground accident last week I apologize for my lack of tact. I hope you can forgive me and please accept my best wishes for a speedy recovery hoppy.
The fact is, you have to constantly delete information from your conscious mind, otherwise you’d go into sensory overload. Try and do it now if you have any doubt. Place your awareness in your right hand, now your left hand too. Now move to your feet and remain aware of your hands. Easy? Maybe, but that’s still only 4, so try thinking about what your lower back feels like without letting your attention move from your hands. By now you will be starting to struggle, but if you’re not keep going and you soon will be.
Think of your conscious mind as being like the RAM on your computer. It does lots of good stuff and it’s nice to have around and all that, but hey c’mon, it’s no hard drive! That is like the difference between your conscious and unconscious mind.
Your unconscious mind can do lots of stuff easily without you ever having to intervene. I presume your heart is beating, your food is being digested, and you do not have to remember to blink your eyes or maintain your blood pressure, right? If not you maybe dead, so stop reading now and call for an ambulance and/or an undertaker.
What happens when you get a strong gut feeling is that your unconscious mind is trying to tell you what it thinks in the only way it knows how, with feelings. It can’t talk to you because it’s unconscious, hence the rather obvious name. It has done lots of calculations, looked at all the permutations, given it serious consideration and is now shouting “Whoa there big fella, it aint a great idea to poke that skunk with a stick” Of course the ‘shout’ can manifest itself in any number of ways. You may get sweaty palms, a nauseous feeling or just a sense of something not being quite right.
So what do most people do when they get a strong gut feeling?
That’s right, they override it. Because it doesn’t make logical sense on the surface, skunk poking notwithstanding, it tends to get dismissed. A feeling is just that, a feeling, it can be hard to put into words. When we can’t explain logically why we think something is a bad or even for that matter a good idea, we can tend to either ignore it completely or use faulty logic to dismiss it out of hand.
Some people (kinesthetics) find to very easy to tune into their feelings, but truly kinesthetic people account for less than 15% of the population. If you’re not one of the lucky few then you’ll have to pay extra special attention. Tune in to your body more often and start to recognize the patterns an when it’s trying to tell you something.
If your unconscious is saying don’t take that job, go on that date, poke that skunk – take heed. It knows what it’s talking about and it has your best interests at heart. The alternative it to disregard it as some weird nebulous feeling that’s come out of nowhere and almost certainly live to regret it.
WRITER'S BIOGRAPHY
Tim Brownson
Tim Brownson is a UK qualified professional life coach and author. He works one on one with people either in person or via the telephone across the US and UK. Primarily he helps people maximize their potential, be more successful and achieve more out of life.
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Comments
Jonathan says on November 17th, 2008 at 6:12 pm
Nice article. The unconscious mind is a crazy thing. Being a Martial Arts student/instructor I’m constantly working to hone the mental and physical ‘built-in’ responses, which are almost always nearly as effective as anything I’ve learned/can teach.
Andrew says on November 17th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
Actually, I find that my unconscious mind brings forth worries galore, and only by suppressing them and thinking rationally can I avoid them.
For instance, yesterday I saw my girlfriend for the second time in four weeks, on a day marking the end of over four months of seeing her reasonably infrequently. I decided to surprise her by meeting her at the airport, but I had a consistent feeling that it would be intrusive, that she’d be too tired, et cetera. Well, I ended up doing it after all, and got lots of big hugs for my trouble.
Tim Brownson says on November 18th, 2008 at 8:03 am
@ Andrew – The unconscious mind cannot talk to you, it’s unconscious. What it sounds like you’re referring to a conversations at a conscious level involving ‘parts’. One part of you wants one thing, one part another.
It was probably your unconscious mind that actually drove you to go rather than all the analysis you were doing.
Laurie | Express Yourself to Success says on November 18th, 2008 at 10:40 am
Good article. I try to follow my gut feeling but sometimes run into difficulty when working with others on a project. It’s hard to convince a group that my vote on a particular subject is because my gut doesn’t agree! However, like I said, I try to follow my gut and I have from time to time voted against or for according to it – and have said so. Generally, and sometimes surprisingly, people do understand. Others start asking question after question and sometimes I’m able to find the answer and articulate my gut. It’s an interesting process.
Melissa says on November 18th, 2008 at 4:16 pm
*crosses arms* But I get my kicks from poking skunks with a stick….
It is very hard to just let yourself feel and not misinterpret what that feeling is saying to you.
Dr. Joe Hornback says on November 18th, 2008 at 7:05 pm
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Deshawn says on November 18th, 2008 at 11:49 pm
Very interesting!
I also think that it helps when we give our body downtime to be able able to recharge and become more centered. Because we get the rest we need and make relaxation a priority in our life, we are abundantly peaceful. My tranquility surrounds my life and I am better able to handle all situations that come my way.
I learn these interesting tips from inspirational and motivational book summaries from http://www.bestsum.com.
sam says on November 21st, 2008 at 10:28 pm
Well I am sure that I am not the only person to have found my gut instinct unreliable and have only begun to grow as I’ve confronted this reality. (if I could find Tim’s email I’d take him up on his offer)
The problem is as other have said, is that our gut comes from the subcoscious, which is just a collection of beliefs we’ve collected over our lives. Some useful some not. It is not a door to universal truth/god/etc.
The trick to growth seems to be to weed out the unhelpful ones (hard). Trusting our gut more rather than testing it (easy) seems a very dangerous strategy.
Tim Brownson says on November 22nd, 2008 at 9:29 am
@ Sam – I’m not sure where you got the universal truth thing from because I never suggested that.
Your unconscious is always infinitely more powerful than the conscious part of you brain. It’s not even close and it’s also not even in any scientific doubt.
It thinks quicker, has more computing ability and it more likely to be right. OTOH, if you aren’t tuned in to it you may very well make a decision at a conscious level based on misunderstanding the signals.
And you unconscious is not just a collection of beliefs, that’s like saying the Grand Canyon is just a hole.
sam says on November 22nd, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Thanks Tim – I’m not wanting to get into a dialogue but still wonder what the basis is for assuming that the unconscious is likely to be right. Yes it has large calculating capacity but where is the evidence that in providing answers for action, as against running the body and dealing with animal instincts, it can be trusted to come up with the right answers? If the computer analogy holds(which it probably doesn’t)it can only be as good as its operating assumptions.
cheers
Sam
Esme Rattigan says on November 25th, 2008 at 2:29 am
It’s really hard to decipher between intuition and anxiety. I often have to stop myself and question whether that split second intuitive feeling that I have is really that? Sometimes if it lasts longer than a split second, and is accompanied by butterflies, it’s anxiety.
Vinnie says on November 30th, 2008 at 9:34 am
Good advice.
I’m curious about where you found out that “15% of people are kinesthetics.” I’ve considered myself a kinesthetic learner from early on and thus have an interest in topics related to kinesthetic learning. I’ve read that kinesthetic learners do exist, don’t exist, are geniuses, universally have learning disabilities and that (according to some modern special education sources) being primarily kinesthetic is inherently a learning disability or developmental “mistake”, but never about it being an advantage in accessing one’s gut feelings. I tend to find it an advantage in that and many other ways. I’d really like to know about your source who also sees being kinesthetic as an advantage and not a drawback.
Tim Brownson says on December 3rd, 2008 at 8:46 am
@ Sam So the computer analogy doesn’t hold, huh? What makes you think that. Look as Esme’s comment because she has described it well. In the final analysis it’s about being in touch with your own feelings and not iognoring them.
@ Vinnie, The best thing you can do is pick up some NLP books on submodalities. Whereas they don’t ‘just’ look’ at kinesthetic learning they will cover it in some detail. Certainly NLP is the only area that seems to take regular and serious looks at the subject.
I for one do not see being kinesthetic as any form of learning disability any more than being auditory is. It is what it is and as long as you can maximize your strengths that’s all that matters.