November 21st, 2007 in Lifestyle

3 doors to instant relaxation

three-doors.jpg

Your mind is racing, your heart is like a time bomb. You can’t think straight and you feel like you will explode if you don’t relax.

Then you remember the standard advice: “Take all of your senses to a grassy meadow. Smell the flowers, listen to the insects, feel the grass, watch the birds flying above you.”

What a load of rubbish.

When I am really under pressure, this sort of method just doesn’t work. How am I supposed to pull together all of my senses to create an image like this. I can’t think straight as it is. I need a quick solution. Something that is reliable, practical and versatile.

I have found that there are 3 quick and reliable doors to relaxation. Try these any time you are stressed to the max and need to relax.

Door 1 is your eyes. Plug your ears (if you have ear plugs, good, if not use fingers). Let your eyes, lazily, slowly drift across any surface near you. Don’t read or identify what you are looking at. Instead, try to just look at the colours and shapes. Is it constant or is there change happening. Can you see definite lines and transitions or are shades blended and fuzzy. If you use only your eyes in this way for a minute or two, you can effectively stop the escalation of stress. You will quickly return to a more normal state of mind and then you can deal with whatever is stressing you.

Door 2 is your ears. Close your eyes. Just listen. Don’t listen for words or recognisable sounds, just listen to the noises around you. Think about what direction they are coming from, and listen to the sounds they are made up of. By isolating your sense of hearing you will cut yourself off from the stream of stress and break the cycle of stress reinforcement. Give it a minute or two and you will be back to a more stable state. Then you can go to work.

Door 3 is your mouth. Close your eyes. Take a small mouthful of food or drink and try to really taste it. Notice the flavours. How many are there? Notice the textures and temperature. What part of your tongue is picking up these sensations. What is it like to chew the food? If you have no food available, just lick your lip and try and taste the subtle flavour of you. Concentrate entirely on your taste sensation and quickly you will be calmed and soothed enough to return to reality with enough peace of mind to be more productive in dealing with your situation.

Think of these exercises as miniature holidays. Sneak away for a minute or 2 with just one of your senses and you will come back a different person. The stressful situation will still be there when you return but you will be in a much better state of mind to deal with it.

Practice it right now, and then when you really need it, you will be ready to use one of your 3 doors to relaxation.

WRITER'S BIOGRAPHY

Tomoleary

Tom O’Leary nearly drowned in an ocean of personal development theory. He lived to tell the tale, dispel the myths and explain what really works. Read about it at LifeGoalAction

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Comments

  • Advice Network says on November 21st, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    #2 can be done as a sleep aid if it is noisy. I tried this once at a really loud hotel. I could not sleep because of all of the noise, but instead of fighting it, I closed my eyes, laid still, and paid as much attention to the noise as I could. I let paid special attention to the feeling of depth and distance. It felt like my awareness was expanding out to the farthest sound, and then I was asleep.

  • oak says on November 21st, 2007 at 11:05 pm

    Very useful Thanks
    They are similar to budism technique. There are the forth door too. Your nose. Close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. In and out. Is it hard or soft, short or long, hot or cold, stable or not.
    If your mind go to think of something else, pull it back to your breathing. Do this everyday, then you will be able to control your mind.

  • michael mckee says on November 22nd, 2007 at 12:15 am

    And can you feel the chair beneath you? That’s right just noticing. Is it soft? Is it hard? And can you notice yourself sinking just a bit more into it. Settling down into your seat. Softly, relaxing into your seat. Nothing to do, for just right now, nowhere to go. Settling down into your seat as you feel the gentle touch of the air on your face. Is it just a bit cool? Are you breathing through your nose or your mouth? And how does it feel to notice the freshness of the air as it moves in and how the air that you breath out is warmer.

  • Karen says on November 22nd, 2007 at 7:55 am

    This is great!
    I think I will try it straight away!
    Work gets so stressful but I don’t take advantage of the river outside our office. I might go there tomorrow at lunch and try the 3 doors!

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