We waste so much of our lives caring about unimportant things, foolish things, and unchangeable things. So much time, energy, and stress unnecessarily squandered. There is so little of us to go around and so much out there that is worth caring about.
Some things you can feel free to stop caring about
Other people’s expectations for your life
This is your life. You are the one who has to live it. You have to live with the consequences of the decisions you make and the actions you take, so you should make them according to what you want for and from your life, not what someone else thinks you “should” do with your life. We care way too much about what other people think about us and far too little about what we think about ourselves.
How much you weigh
It’s just a number people! We live in such a weight-obsessed culture that our weight is often a measure by which we are judged and worse by which we judge ourselves. I’m not saying to stop caring about being healthy, that’s a completely different thing, and one definitely worth worrying about. Just don’t fixate on the number on the scale. Care about healthier food choices, care about how strong you are, how much exercise you’re getting, just stop attaching your value, your success, your confidence, your attractiveness and your health to this one single number.
How other people live
Let other people live their own lives, just as you’d like to be able to live yours. Stop judging what other people do and how they live. That’s their business. If it doesn’t affect you, stop caring about it. Stop comparing what you have, how you look, the money, the status, the possessions, the beauty to what you “think” others have. Don’t measure yourself against other people, measure yourself against your own yardstick.
How many Facebook friends you have
Same goes for Twitter followers. The number of social connections you have is not a good indicator of either the strength of your network or your true popularity. True connections are measured by the quality of interactions and the people you who actually care about you and what you have to say. How people respond to you and share with you is a far better indicator or your social status.
Perfection
We suffer so much anguish caring about being perfect. Perfection is nearly unattainable and our striving for it, costs us so much. Perfect is a waste of time, perfect is unreasonable, perfect is a recipe for stress. Pretty darn good is a better goal. It’s usually more than good enough and far less stressful. (Note: If you’re a brain surgeon or a pilot, please try for close to perfect, but as long as you leave my gray matter in place and get me on the ground safely, I’m good.)
Aging
You can’t stop the clock. It’s a fact, no matter how much you worry about it or how much money you spend trying to hide it, time is going to keep right on ticking and taking you along with it. Stop caring about how old you are. It’s not a good measure of the quality of life anyway. Or maybe it is…Studies have shown that people are actually happier as they age. So stop caring about your biological age and wrinkles (whether you have them or worry about getting them,) and start caring about what how you want to live the years you have left.
Fitting in
We place too much value on conformity. If you like to listen to jazz and wear purple shoes, go for it. If you are the sculptor in a family of accountants, good for you. No make-up, big jewelry, cowboy boots, bow tie, thrift store clothes, dinner on cushions, no TV…it’s all fine. You’re not hurting anyone, and though they may judge you, that’s their problem, not yours.
Star Watching
Why are we so obsessed with celebrities? From reality shows to magazines, entertainment news shows to paparazzi photos, clothing lines to hairstyles, we are so infatuated with the lives of the rich and famous. Why? Are we so unhappy in our own lives that we have to get our excitement and pleasure by watching public figures live theirs? Stop wasting your time caring about what famous people do, good, bad, crazy, sad or fabulous. It has nothing to do with you. It’s only a distraction from your own life.
Being right
We all want to be right. It must be intrinsically bred into our DNA, but more times than not, it’s very destructive. When we’re striving to be right, we’re focused on proving other people wrong. We’re grasping for power by trying to prove our infallibility. Care about finding solutions, collaborating with others to find the best answers, and cultivating relationships. Care about the result, not who is right or wrong.
Anything you can’t control
Stop caring about things you can’t control. If there’s nothing you can do to impact the person or the situation, then don’t waste your energy. There are so many important things in your life, in this world that you can affect. Focus on what you can change, where you can have the most impact, make a difference, and let the rest go.
Featured photo credit: Young happy woman in green field via Shutterstock
True.
Caring about what doesn’t matter is stupidity.
Care what that matters, don’t worry what else you get there consequently.
Anxiety is just the most common problem.
Care, and plan tomorrow. But don’t have anxiety at the meanwhile.
Excellent summation! Now if only we could all actually do that…
Wow! Love it…. seriously sometimes we need to stop caring about those things.
One of the best posts I’ve read on LifeHack in a while! Thank you.
I think #1 is the hardest and easily the most important. It drives everything else. I don’t even want to know how many valuable hours of my life I’ve wasted being overly concerned with what other people thought about my choices.
Right there with you! Doing my best to try to reform…
As an introvert, I could care LESS about star watching. I’ve never been one to use them as a benchmark because I usually cannot relate to them what so ever. Actually, comparing yourself to either someone you see less than or better than you, there is always a loser, so why do it? I love all your tips to worry less. Thanks.
I agree. I don’t get the obsession we have, but it’s so common. I’m with you, I don’t do reality shows or entertainment publications, or social media stalking, but I know many who do.
No more worrying about weight…munch munch munch (as I snack on a Kit Kat bar!) :) Take care of yourself and enjoy what you have.
I reply as I’m munching on my chocolate chip cookie…I think you’ve hit it on the head. I noticed a huge difference personally when I shifted from worrying about wieght and numbers to simply focusing on the intention to take care of myself. It just feels better mentally:)
This is a great post. So much truth. Just on ‘How other people Live’, it’s definitely a great thing to let go of judging people for their beliefs and many of their choices, but i think it’s easy to go too far the other way. I think that actually the defining factor rather than saying ‘if it doesn’t affect me then i wont care about it’, is to say if it doesn’t affect OTHERS then i wont care, because that’s the important thing. If the actions of another person brings injustice, pain and hurt to someone else then we should very much care. What that looks like will always be different but I think that if we stop caring about the consequences of others (and our own) actions on the lives of others then we will be in trouble. I know that’s not the point you were making (you were touching on hypocritical judgement and vacuous jealous bitching), but still worth thinking about! Great post. :)
Thanks, Royale. Great advice, on all counts. I think that the underlying problem of all these unnecessary worries we bring down upon our heads, is mainly an inbuilt, programmed (by our parents, educators, coworkers, you name it) and overpowering insecurity. The cure for which may be simply love. If you love yourself, you accept yourself “as is”, without judging and without looking sideways. You set yourself your goals, and work up from there. I believe that you should worry (or care, if you will) about what you can change, and cease being anxious about what you cannot. Difficult to achieve, I admit, but absolutely doable. It only takes exercising our free will, a treasure with which all of us humans have been blessed with.
Couldn’t have said it better!
Pls excuse the delayed response, thanks for your comment and have a great weekend!
this is just brilliant !! i love this