10 Things in Life That Aren’t Fair — and What to Do About Them (Part 2 of 2)
“If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.”– Johnny Carson
In Part 1 of this series, I discussed some of the ways that life deals us a bum hand, and some of the ways we can deal with that. In this post, I continue the list, starting with some oddnesses about factors that seem to play as big a role, if not even bigger, as individual merit in determining or life success.
1. Most CEOs are tall.
90% of Fortune 500 CEOs are of above average height. Some 30% – compared with only about 4% in the general population – are 6’2” or taller. Since it’s highly unlikely that a random sample of 500 people would show this great a deviation from the national average, the only explanation is that tallness conveys qualities that are seen as “executive material” even when the tall person might lack those qualities or be merely humdrum. By extension, shorter-than-average people with incredible leadership skills might be passed over in exchange for less-stunning but taller candidates.
What to do about it: This is even tougher than appearance issues, since there’s no good way to increase your height (you can wear lifts, I suppose, but will always risk exposure). Again, confidence is key, and the handful of shorter-than-average CEOs out there (less that 3%) are distinguished by their confidence. Study the behavior of shorter CEOs like Jack Welch or Barry Diller. Think “tall” – be seen, make yourself heard. Shorter CEOs also tend to be those that work their way up in a company, so commit for the long haul; taller CEOs come from executive job searches, where they have less personal history and more “flash” in play. And, of course, you can become an entrepreneur – hopefully you wouldn’t replace yourself with someone taller!
2. People buy brands.
Brand loyalty is one of the major factors influencing people’s buying decisions. Part of this is “following the leader” – if I know the brand, it must be because people are talking about it, thus it must be good.” Part of it is packaging design. And part of it is comfort in previous knowledge – the brand you know and kind of like is a better bet than the one off-brand you don’t know and might love or hate.
What to do about it: Commit yourself to trying something new every so often – maybe every month, replace a favorite brand with a brand you don’t know and see how you like it. You pay a huge premium for branding, often at the expense of quality, so it’s worth it to shed a brand here and there. For durable purchases (as opposed to consumables like food), develop a systematic way of comparing your brand against the competitors – Apple (or Microsoft), Ford (or Chevy), Nike (or Adidas) might not always be the best way for you to go, even if you’ve had good experiences with them in the past.
3. People do, in fact, judge books by their covers.
It’s a publishing industry fact – book covers are what grab and hold attention long enough for a purchase to be made. If it were something about the content, you’d expect authors to have some say, but often they have no contractual right to even see the cover before it’s published, let alone approve or disapprove. (More often, authors can disapprove, but publishers reserve – and usually exercise – the right to ignore the author’s disapproval).
What to do about it: If you’re in the authoring game, let book cover designers do what they do best – they know their domain far better than you do. For buyers, check reviews – lots of handheld software allows you to access Amazon and other sites with reviews while you’re standing in the store. Also, get used to using your library – most libraries have online reservation systems that are nearly as effective as Amazon at getting your chosen books to you in a couple of days. That way, you minimize the risk of blowing money on books that turn out to be less than the cover promises.
4. Most people would rather not choose at all than choose between two equally good options.
This is decision paralysis of a sort – when presented with two equally good options, we freeze. Two options where one is clearly better we handle fine, but not where they are equally good, or for that matter, difficult to compare on the same criteria (the apples v. oranges dilemma).
What to do about it: The standard response to difficult decisions is to list pros and cons, but where things are more or less equal, or where pros and cons aren’t comparable, this isn’t helpful. A better option is to re-frame the decision – the think out a way of looking at the choices in a way that is comparable. One way to do that is to look at goals and objectives – what is the goal you hope to meet by choosing one or the other, and which one is better suited to that goal? This moves you past the immediate characteristics of the objects under consideration – that is, one tastes delicious, the other offers two hours of solid motion picture excitement, so if your goal is to have fun for as long as possible, you might spend your $10 on the movie and not the super-sundae.
5. The best ideas often get lost for lack of funding, competence, or experience.
The people who think up brilliant ideas aren’t always in a position to make them happen. They lack sales skills, people skills, marketing skills, or, quite often, just enough money to bring an innovation to market or the mainstream. Or a start-up gets bought out by a monopolistic corporation simply in order to quash their project.
What to do about it: If you’re in a position to do so, seek out start-ups without the skills to succeed and support them however you can. If you’re an idea person yourself, seek out people with the skills you lack – do not could on your idea to succeed for its greatness.
Well, that about covers it – as before, I’d love to hear what you think is unfair about life, and how you’ve dealt with unfairness in your own life. Let us know about it in the comments.
WRITER'S BIOGRAPHY

Dustin Wax
Dustin M. Wax is a freelance writer and project manager at Stepcase Lifehack. He is also the creator of The Writer's Technology Companion, a site devoted to the tools of the writing trade. When he's not writing, he teaches anthropology and gender studies in Las Vegas, NV. He is the author of Don't Be Stupid: A Guide to Learning, Studying, and Succeeding at College.
Follow him on Twitter: @dwax.



Comments
mrbobuk says on September 2nd, 2009 at 3:10 pm
Thanks for this article.
It reminded me of when I was put through a work disciplinary some years back whilst I was operating within IT in local government – it resulted in a protracted dismissal even though the allegation I was suspended for was quashed and I nothing was ever proven. Over time, it chewed at me for months and depressed me to almost the point of suicide but eventually forced me to re-evaluate myself and my life and to regenerate in some respects. Having my wife and my faith in God, held me up during some really long and dark nights. Six years on, I got better job (after doing some pretty dire jobs, effectively in between, which meant starting back at the IT barrel bottom) but you know what, I was thankful for when the current present came around. I’ve since gone from strength to strength. Looking back now, I still do not know why I went through what I did go through but realise that the best response was to fight back. After leaving the company at my displinary meeting, I said verbally to the Chief Exec that I would go on to bigger and better things and that he wouldn’t crush me or my family…and I did.
Mrbobuk.
Erin says on September 2nd, 2009 at 3:28 pm
Few people go into change kicking and screaming louder than me. The further we go along the journey, we realize that closed doors and unfair practices can truly open up the opportunities that fit our talents much better. I have often remained in painful and unfair situations when letting go and pushing though the fear associated with change lead to new and wonderful opportunities.
Richard X. Thripp says on September 3rd, 2009 at 9:25 am
Ideas are worthless. Only implementations matter. You could create a billion-dollar corporation without ever creating a new product. Just improve the products of others and release them as your own.
The first point is very insulting. Did you ever stop to think that maybe tall people ARE generally smarter, better leaders, and more refined? They get that way because they have a genetic boost in confidence from their height. They develop confidence much easily than short people do. Thus, they become more skillful leaders and they get more things done.
Similarly, attractive people are usually smarter, nicer, and more moral than unattractive people. People who are attractive tend to develop their talents further, develop better personal codes, and see the beauty in others. Ugly people often remain bitter, even though their looks may be out of their hands.
Beautiful women are the ones who denounce abortion, while unattractive women who are overweight are the most rabid supporters of infanticide. 90% of the time, attractive people are more moral.
All stereotypes and social biases have an element of truth. Sometimes, they are a very accurate model of reality. They couldn’t become widespread if they were entirely untrue.
Dustin Wax says on September 3rd, 2009 at 1:38 pm
RIchard: All stereotypes do *not* have an element of truth, and none of theones you’ve listed are supported by evidence. Tall people are more confident, in general, asyou say — but that in itself is forthesame reason tall people are more likely to become CEOs — becuase our societyunfairly responds favorably to height. The rest is bunk.
I want you tho think of this next time you’re about to say “All stereotypes have an element of truth.” in the late 1800s through around the 1940s, Jewish men were assumed by scientists (and otehrs) to be like women. Freud had launched hiscareer wit a study of Jewish male hysteria, hysteria being considered at the time an affliction of the uterus. Since having a uterus means you must menstruate, it was only logical (!) to assume that Jewish men menstruated; since they didn’t have vaginas to menstruate through, it was assumed that they menstruated through their most stereotypically notable feature: their noses. WHich is why, it was widely believed, Jewish men had so many nosebleeds.
But Jewish men have an average number of nosebleeds, and obviously don’t menstruate. Not a grain of truth to *any* of the steps along the chain. Just prejudice, ignorance, and meanness. Keep it in mind.
Norman says on September 3rd, 2009 at 11:02 pm
Richard, at first reading I suspect you will find that none of the sweeping statements you made will stand the “real life” test.
Certainly there is some “cause and effect”. Short, heavy, or people considered unattractive might well develop bitter attitudes after being passed over in favor of tall, “attractive”, “air-heads.” But physical size as nothing to do with intelligence, insight or creativity.
A key challenge here is separating assumption and cultural presumptions from measurable reality.
Sarah says on September 4th, 2009 at 12:11 pm
I agree that most people judge a book by its cover. When I browse books in a book shop, I would look at the cover and then decide whether I would open it and check it out. Although we are taught to “not judge a book by its cover”, I guess it is human nature to judge anything by appearance.
Jon Haversham says on September 10th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
This article listed mostly unfair things and what other people can do about them. It was not very informative or useful.
Richard, your comments are absurd. I hope you were trying to incite an argument and do not actually believe what you wrote.
Ibrahim | ZenCollegeLife says on September 28th, 2009 at 10:23 pm
Very cool post. It must have been interesting coming up with it.
Ellen says on October 3rd, 2009 at 1:42 pm
#3 — I never want to read a book that has a cheesy picture!
Jalal HB says on October 7th, 2009 at 11:59 am
I agree with most of the substance – one only gets to know of many things when these are exposed rather than flashy attire or glossy book covers and packings.