In my opinion, it is hard to get a good conversation sometimes, because conversation involves more than yourself – both parties need to be aware of the pitfalls and work together to make the conversation enjoyable.
A way to improve it is to send the following article to your friend. Marcus Vorwaller at Best Tool For the Job has a good article on how to have better conversations. Marcus first analyzes why would people want to converse, what are components that make the conversation unenjoyable. Finally he draws some conclusions from both areas and provides with some advices:
- Don’t be selfish. It sounds harsh, but it’s not as obvious or easy as it seems. Conversation is give and take. There are times when you should listen and times to talk. Doing too much of either is not conducive to good conversation. Listen carefully to the other person then state your opinions after you understand theirs. Even if you are giving advice or teaching someone something, the listening/talking ratio should generally be around 50/50. In the end, the time you feel like you’re “giving up” to listen leads to better conversation. Everyone wins.
- Prepare for good conversation. Read widely. If you know you’ll have a chance for a conversation, learn about the interests of the person you’ll be talking with. Keep up with the news. Broaden your knowledge. This not only will help you have interesting subjects to bring up, but it will help you understand the context of the conversation without interrupting it to ask for a definition. It’s is called cultural literacy.
How to Have Better Conversations – [Best Tool For The Job]