
The Internet has changed the way we relate to each other, as business partners, as clients, as friends, as family, even as lovers. Not only has it become easier to stay in touch with people we already know, it has become easier to find and connect with people we’ve never met before — and might not ever meet at all!
Whether you’re looking for new customers, a new audience, a new business partner, a new vendor, new friends, or a new one night stand, you can maximize your use of the Internet and the wave of social networking sites that have cropped up to help us connect. Doing even a few of these things will set you apart from the vast majority of people who view social network sites as toys and networking as “just for fun” (though it can be fun, too).
- Have a clear purpose: Know what you’re using a social networking site for. While it’s ok to have a profile somewhere that’s just for “hanging out”, you need to know that hanging out is its purpose. If you are using a social networking site to try to build an audience, connect with other professionals, or meet your next wife, it should be focused on achieving that end. Don’t muddy the waters by trying to advertise your dog-walking service, pick up dates for the weekend, post pictures of the company picnic, and build an audience for your homebrew science fiction video series.
- Complete your profile: You’d be surprised how many people never do this. Yet it’s the first thing people want to know about you. Most people check all the boxes (I’m a Virgo, in a relationship… done!) but don’t do much with the real “meat” of their profile, the About Me section. Put some thought into what you want people to know about you and why people should care.
- Don’t follow the leader: It can be tempting to sit back and wait for people to contact you, for people to leave comments, for people to suggest installing some new application — rousing yourself only to respond to whatever prompts come your way. Take the initiative and add people, select a handful of apps you like and stick with them, and update on a semi-regular basis (or a regular basis; schedule 30 minutes a week to update your profile, if it’s an important part of your public image).
- Accept everyone: There are two schools of thought on this: create an inner circle of close colleagues, comrades, or companions; or create a huge body of followers, fans, or ex-girl- and boyfriends. I fall into the second camp — anyone who has taken the effort to “friend” me gets added. Those are the people who are willing to invest their attention in what you’re doing, who have given you permission to “broadcast” your life to them. Welcome them.
- Add everyone you know, no matter how little: Most services these days will scan your address book and tell you if there’s anyone you might already know onboard. Some will also recommend people a on people you already know, places you’ve worked, or interests you’ve highlighted. (LinkedIn is scarily good at this!) If you come across someone you actually know in “real life”, no matter how distantly, add them. That is, after all, the point of social networking — to leverage the often-invisible connections that exist between us and other people. The worst that can happen is that they say “no” — this has never happened to me.
- Pick one or two networks and work them: It can be tempting to sign up for dozens of social networking sites, especially when different contacts turn up on different sites. But it’s nearly impossible to make use of a dozen different sites, unless you figure out how to make a career of it. Instead, pick one or two sites and focus all your energies on creating useful, meaningful connections there.
- Send messages: Find a reason to connect with the people in your network, and send them a message once in a while. Since the main point of this is to keep a channel of communication open, it doesn’t have to be profound — a “happy birthday” is good, if the site reveals birthdays. Don’t, though, make it all about you — that is, don’t post a message to everyone in your list every time you update a picture, go to work, or leave your house. (You laugh — I’ve had friends that did this!)
- Have something to say: Let people know why you’re there, what your purpose is, and what makes you, you. Give people a reason to pay attention to you. Although most people in your circle will stay in your circle indefinitely if you don’t do anything at all, having connections because they’ve forgotten you’re there is hardly the best use of a social network! Post something to your front page, blog, wall, or whatever it is every now and then, so that people learn something about you.
- Avoid clutter: Remember when MySpace pages were awful and Facebook pages were clean and simple. No more — now it takes about 8 minutes for your profile anywhere to get covered with junk. If your page is so full of junk that nobody can tell anything important about you, you might as well not have a page. Limit yourself to only 3 or 4 extras, and either stick with the default theme or try to find one that’s clean and simple.
- Firewall your personal with business lives: This might not apply to everyone, but for most people, once you’ve decided to use a social networking site for business purposes, don’t use it at all for non-business communication — and vice versa. Remember that the story about you, the goat, and the magnum of champagne is going out to everyone you’ve allowed to see your profile. That’s not something you want to share with potential business partners. If necessary, create two profiles on the same site, one for your business persona, the other for your personal life; instead of denying friend requests from friends and family, you can just refer them to the other profile.
Social networking sites have a reputation as being huge time wasters, and for most people, they are. If you can afford that luxury, more power to you; for the rest of you, really think about what social networking can do for you and focus your energies to making that work.
















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Good tips, but for a low yield activity.
For business, for finding friends, and for finding dates there are other activities that return more for the time you spend on them.
Multiply this by ten considering that many people spend enough time surfing to work a part time job.
For business you get more returns on your time by studying to keep your skills sharp, taking classes, joining professional associations and going to LOCAL professional events. More likely to find someone who has a job to offer.
Same thing for finding friends and dates. You get a lot more mileage out of pursuing pursuing interests that have gatherings of people and going to them.
[...] Wax shares these tips in Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites – Lifehack.org [...]
[...] Wax shares these tips in Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites – Lifehack.org [...]
I agree with most of his list, except for Accept everyone and Firewall your personal and business lives. I explain why I’m not an open networker and I mix my personal and business lives on my blog.
I also agree with Steve: social networking sites are low-yield for making good connections. I use them to deepen the connections I have by writing testimonials and checking for updated e-mail addresses and positions.
I don’t use social networking to look for new people. It’s just not good enough. On the other hand, my blog is terrific at helping me find people and have great conversations. Or rather, my blog is terrific at letting those people find me.
Such a difference…
Do we REALLY need a social networking tutorial? Does any business minded person really need to know not to fill out their profile, or keep incriminating personal information out?
If you actually learn something from this article, you’re probably an idiot.
Being an idiot seems to be relative! When it comes to knowing about tourism in Suriname, Brandon may be an idiot, compared to me (according to his own statement).
There’s not much I LEARN from blogs online, but I keep reading them, because they keep reminding me of stuff I may have forgotten/overlooked.
And this article is one of them.
I personally think most of us started using social networks for personal use. Switching over to business use may either mean that you need to get rid of you current profile and friends lists and start anew, or create a new profile. Both options have negatives and I wonder if those negatives can be over weighed by the positives.
Low yield for establishing new contacts maybe, but useful for keeping up with people you already know.
hello
I hope you don’t think me rude, but I wanted to ask if you might pimp this cause and, if you have the time, contribute to it?
http://peacharse.blogspot.com/2008/02/youre-not-only-one_10.html
It’s a book I’m compiling for charity written by bloggers….
Speaking of professional networking sites, does anyone have an extra invite to Virtudex.com? I’m going crazy trying to find one…
I guess I should use these more?
am I REALLY missing out?
seems like with regards to old friends perhaps—but networking not so much.
C.
Keeping separate our personal and business identities online can’t be emphasized enough!
[...] for that embrace easy to spread? The good news is that the web has more muscle than ever for you to tap into. The bad news is it’s radically different (and more difficult) than businesses [...]
[...] Building Relationships – 10 Ways To Get The Most Out of Social Networking Sites – “Have a clear purpose” and “Don’t follow the leader” are among [...]
[...] Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites [...]
[...] Les plate formes sociales ont la réputation de prendre beaucoup de temps, et pour beaucoup de gens, c’est le cas. Si vous pouvez vous le permettre, tant mieux, mais pour la plupart d’entre nous, il faut savoir faire des choix et du tri en la matière afin d’utiliser ces outils avec de vrais objectifs. J’espère avoir pu vous aider en ce sens avec cet article inspiré de celui-ci. [...]
[...] Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites – Lifehack.org Advice on using the social networking approach to raising your profile. Note: You’ll need to be electronically gregarious for these strategies to work for you. [...]
Good simplye steps to get people on the right track… but one thing they failed to add is… perseverance! You will get nowhere without patience and determination.
[...] you’re paying for? The good news is that the web has more muscle than ever for you to tap into. The bad news (for some) is it’s radically different (and more difficult) than [...]
i cant agree with the ‘accept everyone’ part…..remember that a lot of users who use these sites are young, and should be encouraged only to accept people they actually know!
Great post, good list. The easiest point and the one I see many people fudge on is to build your profile as complete as possible.
[...] Building Relationships: 10 Ways to Get the Most Out of Social Networking Sites [...]
Thanks for the wisdom. I especially like the reminder to not leave the “little guys” out of our following as well as having something to say (knowing our purpose). It can get easy to forget these things, and I appreciated what you shared.
#1 Have a clear purpose. Ah! But of course! that is the Key to getting started. Thank you for the article, I will be sharing this one for sure.
~Stacy
@clutterkeeper:twitter
Making The Most Out Of Social Networking Websites at http://www.yellingatme.com/making-the-most-out-of-social-networking-websites/