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Family, Lifestyle, Work

This Is What Happens When You Live With A Nurse

Written by Shereen Mohammed
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Anyone who lives with a nurse knows to be ready for the unexpected. Nursing is more than a job — it’s a way of life, and those who live with (or have lived with) a nurse know that’s true. The following are just a few of the enjoyable and absurd experiences that make living with a nurse so much fun (and a little bit frustrating at times).

1. Think twice before asking “How’s your day?”

When a nurse comes home from work, only the brave asks, “How was your day?” Those who are squeamish probably won’t want to ask this question at all. What you’ll receive is an account of the graphic, funny, sad, weird, gross, and far-from-boring parts of a nurse’s day. If you’re ready to hear about a workday that’s crazier than you can imagine, go ahead and ask.

2. You wonder why they are getting so many calls and text messages.

Nurses receive health questions at all times of day from friends, parents, nieces, aunts, uncles, etc. A nurse is almost always helping a friend, family member, or acquaintance with a medical issues.

3. You never have to go to the store for medication.

Don’t worry, your nurse husband, wife, friend, or roommate is always equipped with medication to take care of your headache, nausea, bloating, cold, diarrhea, or whatever ails you. Check the medicine cabinet and you’ll see that it’s fully stocked.

4. You hear them come home at the oddest hours.

You’ll probably never say “good morning” to a nurse that works a day shift, and a nurse who works at night will rarely be home before you go to bed. Living with a nurse is sometimes like living with no one at all. Although, when a nurse finishes their 12-hour shift, you’re sure to hear some interesting hospital stories.

5. You have a hard time understanding some of their vocabulary.

You may be a little confused when a nurse mentions albumin to globulin ratios, hemoglobin and hematocrit, and other strange medical terms in conversation. The best solution is to keep a search engine or medical book open at all times.

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6. You can rest assured, because they’ve seen it all.

You don’t have to be embarrassed about personal problems, health issues, or moments of craziness when you’re living with a nurse. They’ve always seen something crazier from a patient, and they’ve always been willing to help.

7. You have to give plenty of notice for plans.

Nurses receive their work schedules roughly 3 months in advance, which means you’ll have to be prepared when asking to make plans. Most nurses work every other weekend, so never try to schedule getaways or events two weekends in a row.

8. You never run out of pens or pads of paper.

Pens, pads of paper, refrigerator magnets, and countless other items showcasing the names of pharmaceutical companies float around a nurse’s home at all times. A nurse may despise a particular pharmaceutical rep, but that doesn’t mean they won’t take a free calculator.

9. You hear the strangest phone conversations.

If you’ve ever heard one nurse talk over the phone with another, you know to leave the room immediately. Bodily fluids, surgeries, emergency room occurrences, and patient-bathroom mishaps are common topics of discussion, and if you don’t want to feel a bit nauseous, it’s best to let nurses speak in private.

10. You begin to feel like a doctor.

Listening to a nurse assess your ailments and those of others will lead you to think you’re an expert too. There’s no doubt you’ll start diagnosing your friends with your newfound expertise. Just be sure you send them to a real doctor or nurse after you’re finished giving your not-so-expert opinion.

11. You get used to seeing constant multitasking.

It seems like nurses can perform 100 tasks at once, and that’s because they do this every day at the hospital. You’ll watch as a nurse mops the floor while speaking on the phone, applying a bandage to a two-year-old’s elbow, and cooking sunnyside-up eggs. Never try to perform these same tasks at once, unless of course, you’re a nurse too.

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Featured photo credit: ResoluteSupportMedia via flickr.com

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